Through trial, error and perseverance Scootaloo endeavors to learn how to fly with help from Rainbow Dash.
Chapters (4)
- Member Since 13th Nov, 2013
- offline last seen Jun 18th, 2019
Keeper of time RD
I'm a jackoftrades, pilot, hobby engineer, writer, philosopher of the creed: The truth is absolute & unchanging, so seek the truths that change for no one & you'll find the truths worth holding on to.
Keeper of time RD
Joined 13th Nov, 2013 ·
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This...story...
This is a REALLY good story.
I can see lots of places for improvement and some spelling errors mixed between the chapters, but this STORY. I love it, even though I've seen the concept a thousand times over. You did a really nice job with this, and you should be happy.
Oh, and if you need an editor, which I highly recommend, I got you covered.
Very nice done! I really liked it - couldn't stop reading
... 
awww!
A good idea, solid world building, and good flow. Yep this is a great story. Well done and keep up the good work.
Stay awesome!
~Lightfox Lowell
Thank you everyone for the kind comments.
Some of the ideas in this story could be something of note in writing a good story... Do you have a sequel to this yet?
4247177
Oh? What caught your eye? And ideas did you want to see expanded on?
Also my stories generally share the same lore universe. And while I wouldn't call them 'sequels' this story plants seeds that can be seen in some of my other stories.
4248234
While flight and mentoring have been somewhat commonplace in the fandom, your explanation as to how the Sonic Rainboom works is unique among stories I've read so far. If you could turn this into an adventure series, I could see Scoots and Dash being a major focus. I'd recommend that you improve certain things like show and tell, grammar and sentence structure before trying to do so, however. Punctuation is another thing you probably need to work on; perhaps the most actually, as you're missing a ton of commas and even using them at inappropriate times.
This is my favorite mechanical explanation of scoots inability to fly that I've read yet. Great story.
MOST... AWESOME...LANDING.... EVER!!!!! LET'S SEE HUMAN EXTREME SPORTS TOP THAT!!!!!
4543633
Oh wow, it's been a while since I've gotten any feedback on this one. I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
As for the no cutie mark. Many of my stories are meant to be self-contained stories that happen to be in the same lore universe, so they often share threads that bind them together into a larger story line.
And judging from your comments you've already seen the cutie mark story I went with for Scoots.
Just found this one; and its going into a certain Private Library listing for when I need an extra-good story to pass the time. I do plan to try some more of your stories soon....
5320930
Thank you. I hope I some of my other stories entertain you as well.
Very exciting scene! I thought Scoots wasn't going to make it!
7301938
Glad I could entertain.
Though in all fairness, I was trying to show Dash being a little reckless/over confident in Scoots there. It just turned out to be a risk that paid off because she just so happened to be right in thinking that Scootaloo could pull it off.
This is a very interesting theiry for why Scoots can't fly. I love the interaction between Dash and Scootaloo.