• Member Since 13th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen September 13th

Keeper of time RD


I'm a jackoftrades, pilot, hobby engineer, writer, philosopher of the creed: The truth is absolute & unchanging, so seek the truths that change for no one & you'll find the truths worth holding on to.

T

In a nation enthralled by the dawn of engineering, a young courier engineer and her airplane are hired for a simple delivery. But that delivery soon leads her and her friends down the path of adventurers greater than any of them had wanted.

Chapters (25)
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Comments ( 12 )

It could be just me, but I'm getting a Last Exile kind of vibe from this story.

8671518

Mmm... Last Exile, it's been an age since I saw that. I remember it was one of the good ones, even if I can't remember what the major points of that story were. Although remembered or not I did see Last Exile so I can't deny the possibility of influence from it. That said, I suspect Last Exile is probably better than my story.

Regardless I hope this story entertains anyway.

You had my attention with the premise. Now, you have my attention. Might wanna de-ham Shining a bit, or at least add a twirlable moustache.

8692008

you'll have to forgive me, but I don't think I've ever heard the term 'de-ham' before. So what does it mean to you?

Assuming you're referring to Shining talking like a cheep comic book villain, that is intentional. And although the reason isn't directly stated, it should become clearer once the reason for his betrayal is revealed.

8693549
You have the right of it. It was a bit abrupt and went oddly with what happened after.

8693971
You know what? it's not that important of a detail anyway. So if you really feel it's that disruptive of the flow, maybe it is better if I change it.

This story deserves way more views and upvotes. Keep un the good work! :twilightsmile:

8730061

That's kind of you to say, thank you. :scootangel:

Although I can't say I'm surprised, I've noticed a pattern that alternate universe stories tend to get less traffic than non alternate universe stories. And when you think about it it kinda makes sense. Most come here because they like MLP:fim, and an alternate universe story means nothing that you think that makes it an interesting lore universe has to be true.

And seeing as I'm not super popular from elsewhere, I can understand why many would be hesitant to take a gamble on my first true alternate universe story.

8732011 I've noticed that too, but to he honest I think most stories get popular (outside the instant hits that come and go every week) because they use the group system smartly so they can promote their stories. There are some cases outside that pattern and many of the stories in the featured box right now are just in one group , but if you check on others you'll probably see that the stories are featured in many groups, and probably in heavily populated ones.

Give some time, and slowly but surely your story will be more known. It's an original Alternate Universe and a very interesting one at that, and at least you don't mix up your genres while writing (I've seen many slice of life stories that suddenly turn into a dramatic adventure with edgy villains and all the jazz) keeping up the same pace through the story. Really, thank you for sharing it with us :twilightsmile:

WOW just... WOW. wonderful job!

8773311

Thank you, it’s always nice to know when someone thought I did a good job.

Especially in this case, since I hadn’t received any feedback since I posted my completely rewritten chapter/ending.

Even though I was always certain that the version I posted was better, the demons of doubt have a nasty habit of making you wonder if the first version would have been better anyway. That is until someone takes the time to tell you that that what you did end up doing was a good enough story to be worth the time to type out a compliment.

So thank you, I really am grateful for your kind words. :scootangel:

8776613
Glad I made your day! A lot of the time I see half done barely edited work and I feel like the author doesn't even care but then I see works that flow nicely and are never too confusing, without being a list of details. Those works (aka this one) that are made well without just collapsing I love and you ended it with an ending, not just a stopping point that's hard to do. thank you for making something that makes my heart be happy and content in the end.

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