Looks like good old Celly didn't have a medicinal slap on the fetlock in a while. Time to remedy that.

im worryed about both what the spell acctuly did and what will happen with twilight if she does go against celestia as tecnicly if the elements of harmony still respond to twilight and the others after that then celestia would be in the wrong according to harmony?

This is more or less one of the things I was afraid of. Mind magic to make him accept his situation. And it is interesting considering Twilight had considered the same/similar mind spell, but she had the courtesy to ask. Celestia stringing Twilight along is dirty pool and I'm glad Gerry is forcing Twilight to see that she was and is being used to further an agenda that Twilight is strongly against.

I bet Celestia doesn't even consider the fact that she is worse than Sombra. Neither has any qualms about breaking someone's mind for their own benefit. The difference is Sombra was open about what his mind control was. Celestia doesn't think she's done anything wrong, when it is really about a guilty conscience; committing two wrongs to make a right.

She was compassionate in all of the worst ways.

Couldn't say it better myself.

I hate seeing the turmoil Gerry is in, but I'm hoping he can hold on to his identity, even if he can't break this spell or find a counterspell to prevent it from getting worse. The fact that he is still able to get angry, even if it is just being angry about not being able to do so, is a good sign. As long as he can focus on that, he won't lose everything.

God, it is going to be really, really bad when he gets his first heat. That is going to end very, very badly if what naturally happens, happens. Everything Celestia has done to prevent suicide could end right there. Knowing her, the magic would probably stop him. Which makes it even worse because he'd have to go on in agony, being unable to do anything to truly stop the pain.

Well. I'm 110% Mad now. Everything, literally everything has gotten worse and worse, with no hope in sight. It all feels so hopeless. Fuck.

I nodded. Rainbow rolled her eyes, “If this snore fest is going to keep going, I’m outta’ here. Hey Toffee, me and AJ are going out later. You should come with.”

Technically: "AJ and I," But I suspecy Rain isn't much for grammar.

Celestia took Gerry's body, his gender, and his ability to recognize the hurt he is going through, the harm that was done to him. What a lovely Princess.

Twilight, you and Luna are princesses. equal to rank as her. TAKE HER TO TASK. I can not believe there is no law against what she has done

If other ponies don't understand, you can easily explain it by stating Celestia turned him into what he is now and took away q great many thing about himself he valued, and then cast a spell to force him to accept having all the things he loved taken away. So what if AJ was made to abandon her farm and family, or RD flying, or Fluttershy her animals, or Pinkie her parties?

I'll do a lot for a laugh. This? This is neither cute nor funny, it's a cruelty that I could not bring myself to inflict. However, Sombra would be rather proud of this.

Congratulations, Sun-Butt, Sombra and you have something in common.

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Yeah, and the last time Luna tried something like that, even if she was in the wrong then, she ended up on the moon.

You know if you wanted to go even darker with this story. I think i found the perfect new vessal for the return of the "Nightmare" that possessed Luna. It is clear Gerry/Toffee really hates Celestia, she is emotionally and mentally scared by Celestia, and she wants Celestia to know it. Almost all things that drew the "Nightmare" to Luna are being shown here with Gerry/Toffee. I can totally see the "Nightmare" being drawn to her, bargaining/manipulating her making her slowly giving in to the "Nightmare" and eventually agreeing to be possessed with the promise of revenge and bringing Celestia to justice for what she did to Gerry/Toffee. But this is just an idea if you wanted to make this story go darker. I look forward to your next chapter.

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In the nicest way possible, I feel that that is a horrible idea for a direction of the story. By adding in "Nightmare" to make the story more dark, you are stripping the complexity and layers of the conflict. Celestia in this story isn't evil or the bad guy, she is a woman who has lived a very long time and feels that she knows best. Garry isn't the "good guy" he's a man who got caught by circumstance and would have been living in a world where he is not meant for. The point of the conflict is that Garry wanted to make a choice and that right was stripped from him. I feel by adding in Nightmare you not only simplify the narrative by making it about corruption and revenge rather then a "real" and complex issue. As well as you create a very black and white hero villain dichotomy. I feel this story works best when it is about the real and complex issues dealing with Gender Dysphoria, Body Dysmorphia, the the lack of choice you can have regarding these issues.

Thank you for attending my TED talk (also sorry if this is too harsh on your idea)

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No worries. Also i'm not upset or offended.

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there proberbly is but all current other alicorns are in a situation where they are less likly to stand up to her with twilight and cadence its a case of family or close relation and looking up to while with luna she isnt over the nightmare compeltly at this point if im correct so she might be hanging back because of that. i mostly just want a happy endid for him at the end either he gets a body he is comfortable with or gets the option to change the world so something like this canot happen again (either by the depowering of celestia or the empowerment of the mc). either way i hope for a happy ending of everyone exept celestia

Okay this has been bothering me for a while. This is not really a rewrite it's a completely different story. I enjoy it, in a very different way but it's kind of starting to get old. Yeah, Celestia is and has always been a bitch. She treats everyone like puppets that are only good for playing the part she chose for them in her perfect little world. If I were in Gerry's place I'd have truly confronted her by now and at least one of us would be dead.

I know she hasn't been brought into this story yet, but I do wonder how Cadence would factor in if introduced--and I could see Celestia dragging her into this mess. On one hand, she could be as heavy-hoofed as she was once shown in the comics and cast a love spell to push a Big Mac/Toffee romance. Or she could take love seriously and use a more subtle touch to make sure things happen right. Would she feel betrayed by Celestia too if she learned the truth only after being pushed to act?

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This is not really a rewrite it's a completely different story.

Yeah at some point I was complaining to myself about it. I guess I can't take this kind of story as lightly anymore? Like, it's already dark enough as it is - I'd feel bad if I did what I did in the original and just had them have sex as quickly as possible. Gerry is more of a character in this one which makes it harder for me to justify fucking with him, if you know what I mean. I wrote a new second person story where I could just go wild without worrying about it because of this. Is it possible to be too kind to fictional characters?

The first version of this I wrote SEVEN YEARS AGO THIS MONTH. That's completely insane. I'm a completely different person to all the way back then and it shows for better or worse. My writing got a lot better, but I also started to think more about the ethics of being turned into a fictional cartoon horse and having sex. I need to lighten up.

Thanks for sticking with it all this time anyway. And I'm sorry to everyone if there ends up being no fucking - if the demand is there though, you know how it is.

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Sorry about that. I was overly upset at the time. Nothing against you. I do enjoy this story. I just really don't like Celestia. Poor Twilight has been nothing but a tool and a puppet forced to take on Celestia's burden because she has changed her mind over a decision she made. Rather than continue to deal with the results of her choices she takes a filly and shapes her from a young age just so she can transfer that burden to another who isn't even allowed to make a choice.

As for the direction and tone of the story I say do whatever you want I just thought it was worth pointing out how different from the original it was. Not saying that's good or bad just different.