Crusader No More
Scootaloo's POV
I stood looking at Princess Celestia, probably the most royal princess of all, with two guards standing expectantly next to her wondering when she would say something else. It was an awkward moment- but a strange moment at the same time- it felt like I was looking at someone from my distant pass, someone I'd lost and forgotten. I shook the thought off, how could I know Princess Celestia, I've never seen her before.
"Well Princess, do you remember Scootaloo?" One of the guards asked, stomping his hoof on the ground in frustration.
"Of course I don't, we have important matters to attend to now, I can't be doing with silly little fillies like 'Scootaloo', come on." Celestia stomped off towards her carriage ready to leave Ponyville. I cantered away from Sugar Cube Corner, not wanting to return to school or my so called home, just to have some time to myself with my thoughts.
Sobbing to myself, I wandered down one of the many secret alleyways in Ponyville, no idea where I was going and not caring where I would turn up. Running through my head were images of Celestia and the surprised looks on the guards faces when they saw me outside. I let out a huge sob and some fresh new tears poured down my face. When I looked up my vision was corrupted by a pink blob, that was probably Pinkie Pie.
"Awww, now I've got to cheer up yet another sad filly," Pinkie complained. "Come to Sugar Cube Corner, Scoot, I've got yummy cupcakes!" Pinkie Pie draped a hoof over my shoulder and steered me back the way I came. I shrugged her hoof off my shoulder and turned around shoving her out of my way.
"I understand you just want to cheer me up, but I want to be ALONE!" I yelled at the pink party pony, sadness evident in my eyes.
"Apple Bloom told me that you crusaders had a meeting tonight in your clubhouse," she said smoothly, looking at me to see how I would react.
"Oh, darn it. I completely forgot. Sorry, got to dash," I yelled over my shoulder as I galloped of in the direction of the clubhouse.
**********************************************
"Scootaloo dumped us, face it Apple Bloom, she's gone to hang out with cooler kids," I heard Sweetie Belle sob, as I entered the clearing where our clubhouse was based. Panting I clambered up the stairs and into the Cutie Mark Crusaders clubhouse that was based right in the middle of Sweet Apple Acres. As I entered the clubhouse I felt a faint tingle on my flank but thought nothing of it.
"I haven't dumped you guys, just a minor issue at Sugar Cube Corner, nothing for you to worry about," I panted as I laid down next to Sweetie Belle. Apple Bloom took a quick glance at my flank and screamed.
"What is it Apple Bloom?" Sweetie yelled, she then looked at my flank and joined in screaming with Apple Bloom.
"Scoot, Ah didn't know ya was a traitor, ya went crusading without us. AND YA EARNED YA CUTIE MARK, NO FAIR!" Apple Bloom wailed, pointing at my supposedly bare flank. Instead of orange fur on my flank, there was a teardrop cutie mark! I rushed out of the clubhouse, with no regret of leaving as I was no longer a crusader and the other two were probably going to kick me out any way.
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Sparknanator · 1.3k words · 65 1 · 1.9k views
- Safaia Bara · 8.8k words · 63 2 · 3.7k views
- Junster00741 · 9.2k words · 19 2 · 1k views
- yodajax10 · 2.3k words · 118 8 · 6.5k views
- Corey_ · 3.8k words · 71 1 · 2.3k views
- Night Princess · 5k words · 68 8 · 2.7k views
- ImpossibleReflection · 5.9k words · 62 2 · 2.2k views
- VashTheStampede · 4.3k words · 72 7 · 2.9k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.111 seconds
Total duration
1,032 users online
1,628,628 hits today, 2,244,100 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This seems a bit early, but, MORE (slams hands on table)
10/10 c:
What happend? One second she is at Sugar Cube Corner meeting Celestia and now she has her Cutie Mark and everything took a turn for the worse. Seriously, What the Funk happend?
short. needs MORE details, and way more story lines. i like the original idea but you need to rewrite it
2720515
I agree. I think maybe take another day just to think about everything that should happen and explain it more.
Still love the idea but that went WAY too fast. One second she's outside Sugarcube Corner and the next? I suppose that might be her confused point of view but we're all hoping for some more details please.
No idea what happened. One moment she's at Sugar Cube Corner and the next she's running away from it crying. I thought that she was a foal when she was foal-napped. But she's talking like she KNOWS that Celestia is her mother. That makes NO sense. She isn't supposed to know that, that really ruins the story for me, but i'm going to keep reading it.
like the idea when you gonna update the story
...Wat?
The premise is good, but the story itself makes no sense at all. I have no idea what's going on. Not to mention all the run-on sentences... In addition, you've messed up a few names, namely that Sweetie Belle's name is supposed to be two words and Applejack's is just one.
this is confusing.you went way too fast,and if she was foal-napped how does she know celestia is her mom? i hope this gets better later on.
whoa! slow down yer loosing me here, ya might wanna redo this and take it slow this time just an honest opinion
Um... ok first way too fast, two Celestia would not act like that and I would think the Guard if knowing that Scoots was Tia's daughter would have said something about that other wise he would not have said anything. Also... I don't think AB would have kicked Scoots out of the CMC just like that.
Bad idea, worse execution. -1/10 would vomit again.
cant w8 for more this is really good
Um... This chapter... Makes NO SENSE!!
This is a good premise but you do need to work on your issue of pacing and while I imagine the guards trying the subtle approach to jog Celestia memory I can't picture Celestia acting that way towards a filly.
Scootaloo's tAlent is... Crying???!!!
2720515 thanks for the advice I will take a couple of weeks to just edit it and once again thanks
Moar
OH GOD! I NEED MORE OF THIS!
Her cutie mark is crying?
3015914
3432945
I'm going to have to agree with Blaze Song here, at least for a couple points. In the previous chapter, Scootaloo remarks that she hopes the guards remember her, and that it's been a long time, yet in this one, she has no recollection of Celestia, nor why the guards look at her the way they do. And in this one, Scootaloo's mark doesn't make a lot of sense... Teardrop... crying... That's about as far as it goes... Plus, I highly doubt the Crusaders would expel one of their own simply because they received their mark. In fact, I think they'd be more interested in using that pony to help the others obtain theirs.
I think scootaloo's cutie mark is for being emotional
please continue
its been almost 3 years sence a last update. I need more
. Please
Great, but Celestia, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle seem really ooc here. Also, really fast pacing, slow down a little, but otherwise, interesting story premise, I really like it.
Almost 4 years
This story is dead.
8082091
Almost 6.