If diplomacy is an art form, then it's surely the most boring one of the lot. After a full day of fruitless trade negotiations with the Crystal Empire, I'm about ready to give up my royal title if it means avoiding more mind-numbing talks tomorrow. In the meantime, though, at least there's a nightclub in town. And from what I've heard, her Highness Princess Flurry Heart is its most frequent, infamous, and insatiable patron.

On second thought, maybe this trip won't be as tedious as I thought.

My entry for FanOfMostEverything's "Imposing Sovereigns" contest, using the prompt "Partier Flurry Heart. Rated Teen for language, drug use, and suggestive (but non-explicit) content.

Cover image cropped from this piece by Plainoasis. (Sorry, Glim-Glam, but you're not in this story so you had to go.)

Thanks to Themaskedferret for editing/cheerleading assistance.

You know what they say: you haven't really made it as a writer until you take advantage of your fleeting Internet fame to inflict a bunch of micro- and speed-fiction on your followers that wasn't long enough for you to feel clean posting them as individual stories.

If you're wondering who "they" is in this scenario: it's me. "They" is singular now. It's 2019 the entire year that encompassed March 2020 the 2020 decade 2021 [insert current year, time is a social construct], and we live in the future.

Posted in as close to chronological order as I can remember. Story ratings vary from E to T, mostly for bad words and heavy themes here and there.

Yesterday, Dinky Hooves learned a new word. Today, she's going to share that new word with her two best friends at school.

Fluttershy really should've watched her mouth a little more.

[Based on you-all-know-which scene from S6E11: "Flutter Brutter". Thanks to Tayman and themaskedferret for pre-reading.]

Princess Celestia has been planning for this day for years: the return of Nightmare Moon, the restoration of the Elements of Harmony, and the ushering of Equestria into a new age of friendship and love. Now that it's finally arrived, all she has to do is wait for Twilight to get to Ponyville, make some friends, hunt down the Elements, and save the...

Wait, what'd that letter say?

She didn't get on the chariot?

She went to whose party instead?

Oh. Oh, this could be bad. And more importantly, it's gonna need some hooves-on interference from Celestia to get her master plan back on track. But it'll probably all work out in the end. After all, how big a deal could one party be?

Third-place finalist in Aragon's "Comedy (Is Serious Business)" contest

When I was a foal, I despised Apple Bloom more than anypony else in the world. Years later, my feelings have changed, and so have Apple Bloom and I. But some things will always be the same: she will always be honest, and I will always be a liar. To her, to my parents, to the world—and to myself.

2nd Place Finalist (Tied) in the 2019 EFNW Iron Author competition. Set several years after the show, as per the prompt.

One way or another, Buttercup always knew things would end like this for her and Bright Mac. She just wished she’d known well enough to wonder what she might do when that moment finally came.

A very, very overdue reworking and posting of my 2018 Everfree Northwest Iron Author entry.

A few weeks before her college graduation, Sunset Shimmer attends Twilight Sparkle's funeral. She'd rather be anywhere else but here. She'd rather think about anything but what role she played—or didn't play—in her girlfriend's premature death.

We don't always get what we want, though. After the last several months, Sunset knows that better than anyone.

Winner of Oroboro's "Sunset Shipping Contest: Endings." Rated T for language, not-exclusively-adult themes, and brief tobacco use.

Six years ago, the first kaiju emerged from deep within the ocean and rampaged through sixty square miles of the Pacific Northwest, including the town that used to be my home. In the months that followed, we found out we weren't the only ones to be attacked—across the dimensional divide, our friends in Equestria suffered even more cataclysmic losses than we did. Even after our two species came together, we couldn't stop the beasts from coming, nor could we save any city they chose to destroy. We were at war—and we were losing.

But then, two years after the kaiju war started, billions of dollars and millions of wasted lives later, we figured out how to get back on top. We fought back. We started winning. And it was all thanks to six teenage girls, a little bit of magic, and their technicolor talking pony clones.

Okay, yeah, I should clarify: there was a lot of magic involved.

===

A Pacific Rim crossover several years in the making, first published in my printed anthology The Voices Are Telling Me to Hug You.

In the midst of a battle to protect Equestria, Twilight Sparkle falls. For a moment—just a moment—she wonders if she should bother getting back up this time.

A treatise on 2020, written and published 12 days late. Blame it on the Gregorians.

“I’m not making you do anything, Flurry," Cozy murmured. “I’m giving you a choice. Me or your empire. And we both know what the right call is.”

Winner of FanOfMostEverything's "Imposing Sovereigns III" contest, using the prompt "Flurry Heart/Perseverance" (and technically "Cozy Glow/Determination" as well).