Fic recs, October 23rd! · 4:44pm Oct 23rd, 2014
Did you know I follow 26 people who haven’t written anything? Crazy, right? Some of them are admins who aren’t writers. Some are musicians or VAs who aren’t writers. And then there are the people who I hang around with all the time and tend to forget are not writers. And then I judge them. I am judging them right now because they need to start writing. :|
Pascoite’s begun an interesting conversation about EQD, fic rejection and decreasing numbers of writers seeking help over here.
Neighrator Pony needs more exposure! He’s done a reading of Old Friends by RBDash this time, which is an excellent story. Dude just keeps cranking these out. :D Remember, you can follow him on Fimfic to get the updates, he cross-posts the videos. :B
Lastly, after the my last blog’s impromptu poll, I will be doing a Skywriter edition of fic recs sometime in the future! I chose him out of a three-way tie mostly because he has fewer stories that need vs. posts than Cold in Gardez. <.< (Also damn, it’s amazing how many stories from both of them I read before I started reviewing.) So he can expect to have his entire life’s work shit upon get some analysis of his stuff soon! :B Ish. My next project is reviewing all the writeoff fics, of which there aren’t as many (in the group anyway) as you’d think. (It’s also worth noting that, since he got a number of votes, I have added all of autumnschild’s stories to my RIL, and I added a few stories by other people who were voted for, but who I'm not following. Expect some reviews eventually!)
Anyway, I have no idea how this one got so huge that’s what she said, but hold onto your butts RILs, 'cause it’s about to get bumpy!
H: 0 R: 9 C: 3 V: 3 N: 0
Mr. Lonelyheart Meets Miss Lovestruck by scoots2
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Cheese Sandwich is called upon to throw a wedding party for Braeburn. The only problem is, Braeburn hasn’t exactly met his bride-to-be, and neither is what the other expected. This is fun for a couple of reasons, and the big one is Cheese. He makes a great foil for Braeburn, and he’s characterized really interestingly. In Pinkie Pride, most of what we remember of him is the wacky party pony, but it’s easy to forget that he spent the first and final few minutes of the episode being very serious. It’s suggested, in no small amount of words, that he only gets silly once there’s partying to be had, and because no wedding party is imminent in this piece, he remains stoic. I will say I was a bit put off by the reasons why Braeburn and Cherry Jubilee are disappointed in one another, mostly for Braeburn’s side, though they do balance. Cheese sees her as older than expected, overweight, and very much made-up, while Braeburn is too young and not the rich, middle-aged ranch owner Cherry was expecting. The clincher is that one is meant to stay on an apple farm, and the other on a cherry farm, and they sort of neglected to mention that in their letters. I want to give this points for having a really great punchline, which is something that’s been rather lacking in stories I’ve seen of late. On the whole, if you’re up for a low-key comedy featuring an interesting mix of side characters, check this one out.
Recommended
The Great Ponyville Snowball Fight by 8686
Reading by Goombasa
Genre: Comedy
After Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie declare snowball war on Twilight and Applejack, things begin escalating. This is one of the best slice of life (that is, no-stakes) fics I think I’ve ever read. Central to it is a true understanding of the ethos of Equestria: that it is perfectly reasonable for an entire town, even its leaders, to drop what they’re doing in order to engage in what is essentially a huge game of pretend. Missteps were few. There are a couple spots where the comedy is meant to come from overblown language that doesn’t really fit the tone. I was surprised when, partway in, Twilight was addressed as “Princess”, because given her “what is the point of this frivolous activity, oh wait, now I am experiencing this emotion known as ‘fun’” reaction to the snowball fight, I had this pegged as a season one fic. The Princesses’ arrival was, I felt, wholly contrived, though Luna absolutely steals the fic with a single line. Derpy’s scenes were maudlin and helped drag the story out a little too long, and that is where the major issue lies. There are so many spots where it seemed like the comedic beat of the moment would be the perfect punchline to end the story on, but it kept going and going. For the most part, this worked, but the author got greedy and kept pushing for more, driving up the chance of narrative overreach. Derpy’s scenes were partly to blame for this; the CMCs were another part. I wouldn’t hold this story up as an example of pacing, but as a light, show-tone comedy, it’s really fantastic. I like this 8’s and 6’s man.
Recommended
Lyra Grows Fingers by Scramblers and Shadows
Reading by Doctor Cobra
Mature: Gore
Genre: Horror
So I went into this expecting a little of this action, and I was so very, very wrong. Lyra grows fingers… from her shoulder. Oh my god this story is creepy. D: Body horror is a really good way to get a reaction from an audience, but few are the ponyfics I've seen that have actually been able to pull off any real kind of horror. It’s not just that fingers are growing from a place they have no business growing, nor that they’re sentient and start attacking her, nor even that they keep fucking growing. What sells the body horror is that Lyra feels through them. And much like Ash in Evil Dead, she’s gotta hack them off herself. The writing is perfect, showcasing Lyra’s obsessions in good order and using the “pop” sound effect to make everything that much creepier. (The innocuous noise Doctor Cobra uses for the onomatopoeia in the reading really helped.) Missteps are few; mostly I was just concerned by how bitchy Bon-Bon is. She wasn’t selling “they’re in a relationship” very well, though she makes up for it by the end. There’s also a good bit of swearing and some other, minor asides that didn’t feel too pony, which surprisingly bothered me more than anything else. I was thrown by the phrase “horn field”, though it’s at least easy to figure out what it means. I did like making Lyra a music teacher, as that’s a rather unusual, but entirely believable step for her as a character. I was absolutely riveted by this story, and fans of Stephen King will find a lot to enjoy. As for the rest of you, ‘tis the season for creepy shit, so turn off your Mature filters (it does get very gory toward the end, and though somewhat gratuitous, I will say this is the one fic where gore actually adds to the narrative) and go check this out! As horror, it’s up there with NIGEB, and as an inversion of fandom tropes, it’s tops.
Recommended
Best Friends Forever by Obselescence
Reading by Scribbler, Ghostly Hamburger and Wish Lotus
Review #1400!
Genre: Psychological
Celestia pays Twilight and her friends a visit. I would love to leave the review with just that non-descript summary and “it’s Obselescence, go read it”, because going into this story blind is so very rewarding. But if that's not enough for you, let me give you a taste of what to expect. It’s obvious that something is wrong early on because Celestia is flying over an abandoned Sweet Apple Acres and she has to disable magical wards to get into Twilight’s castle. Most importantly, the castle has a nursery, and its cribs are filled with… Twilight’s friends. The rest, you get to find out yourself. Suffice to say this is one of the best “Crazy Twilight” fics I’ve ever read, and the ending is fantastic. It carries a really weird idea all the way through. I will say that there were a couple spots where I wished the narrative wasn’t telling us what was going on, but in the end, this one’s totally worth reading. And in season!
Recommended
Fluttershy’s Night Out by Bad Horse
Reading (part 1) by Hero541
Genre: Real Issues
Fluttershy goes out to a bar and meets someone. This is a story about a lot of things, but I’m not sure I can figure out what it’s about about, and I fault myself. I feel like all the parts are there and I’m just not putting them together. If I had to sum it up, I would say “sex doesn’t make you a whole person”, but I think that would be missing something. There’s Fluttershy, pre-show, trying to find her place in Ponyville, conquer her fears and grow up all at once. There’s the ponies vs. animals thread, which I couldn’t figure out at all. Then there’s the fact that this was written by Bad Horse and I spent the whole time reading it in a tizzy, waiting for the big R to drop. But while you could read consent or lack thereof into this story, it’s plainly obvious that that isn’t the point. The point, as I think is more clearly stated by the epilogue (added in after a year), is kindness, and forgiveness, and quite possibly that forgiveness is more about the forgiver than the forgiven. Definitely worth a read.
Recommended
To Be a Mule by archonix
Reading by Scribbler, Dusk Spade and Glacier36
Genre: Politics
A young mule in love with a unicorn has a lot to learn about the rules of life. I like this because it focuses on Equestria’s institutionalized racism without having that be the entire reason for the protagonist’s problems. It’d be a little pat if it had. Added to this is Dal’s father’s views on romance, which are wholly realistic and entirely appreciated. This is a short piece, but in it we get a lengthy view of Equestrian society from those on the bottom of it, not to mention a rundown of one man’s regret. It’s really worth the read.
Recommended
Gateway to Happiness by Spacecowboy
Genre: Epistolary
I ran into this feller while in the midst of Project Bookshelf, and he basically goaded me into reading one of his fics. :V That said, most of his big ones were pretty long, so the chances of me picking something good out of the short ones were low (as I have found tends to happen). This one, for instance, needs some work, mostly just in the writing. It takes a few paragraphs, for instance, to really sound like Twilight, and there are some spots where sentences could use some ironing out. But at its core, this presents an interesting idea: Twilight telling Celestia what she’s learned about other ponies by looking in their eyes. This is, if anything, a refutation of your standard immortality fic, taking place as it does between seasons 3 and 4, and I appreciate that.
Recommended If You Value Substance Over Style
Magic, and Mayhem, and… Murder? Oh My… by Invictus
Reading (part 1) by Stephen Caroe
Suggested by Blood_rose_doll for being my 468th follower
Genre: Psych Crossover
An Earth-banished Nightmare runs afoul of fake psychic detective Shawn Spencer in her attempts to return to Equestria, and ends up dragging him along with her. I don’t know jack shit about the show this is a crossover with, but from what I can glean through the Wikipedia page, main character Shawn Spencer is a gifted, Sherlock-Holmes-level detective who, for some reason, isn’t really a detective and has to use his deductive powers and eidetic memory to pretend to be a psychic so he can actually help the police. It sounds funny, at least. Needless to say, when I was assigned this story to read, I was dubious. I certainly wouldn’t have read this story on my own, but happily, I’m glad I did, and I’d like to thank Blood_rose_doll for recommending it and being patient while I got around to it. (I might even consider checking out the show now!)
So what worked? For starters, Shawn comes off as your standard snark-fueled protagonist, which may turn off those leery of HiE’s. However, what the author does right by him is A) not make him the only POV character (though the first switch to someone else was rather jarring), and B) not make him the only funny character. (I was impressed, for instance, that Shawn was not the one to make the requisite “only the Shadow knows” joke.) This story has a good Pinkie Pie, and Shawn plays off Rainbow Dash remarkably well. He actually turns out to be an interesting character on his own merits. We get to see him both exercising his detective skills, and putting on his psychic act not only to bamboozle his opponents, but to impress his allies. I particularly enjoyed the running gag of his malapropisms, which was never overused. (Oddly, I found myself comparing him to Harry Dresden a lot; I mean, he even has a tiny car with a name!) Ultimately, the story ends up being about Celestia trying to atone for her mistakes, which is a plotline I always find compelling.
There’s a huge amount of really great world-building in this, as the last half takes place in a lawless city of thieves and smugglers, whose existence is explained quite well. (And in the ballsiest use of canon to justify breaking tone, Pinkie is linked to it just as believably.) The best world-building involves the minotaurs, though I also liked the snatches of Diamond Dog language. And on that note, this is one of those stories that revels in spotlighting all the ‘major’ races of Equestria, yet manages to do so without feeling contrived. There are plenty of great side characters, not all of them ponies. This is also a story an example of a crossover done well. There was only one spot where a reference to Psych lost me and was never explained, but it was a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it sort of thing whose loss didn’t negatively affect the narrative.
The story comes in three acts. The first quarter or so is more or less your standard HiE: Shawn comes to Equestria, has to figure out what’s going on, makes friends with ponies. It’s honestly the weakest part of the story, with only one bit making it interesting: the question of what will happen to the Nightmare in his head. (An aside: I fully expected that Shawn would end up possessed by the Nightmare, or at least unleashing it into the world; that’s not what happened, so I have to assume I read something into the story that wasn’t there. Hopefully that doesn't ruin the first part for you.) The second third or so involves Shawn getting caught up in a murder investigation in Canterlot. Now, while the reasons for this happening are pretty contrived, once you’ve made that transition from HiE to “oh, now he can can show off his detective skills”, things really pick up. Not to mention, the ponies’ reaction to things like crime and death really sells the difference between Earth and Equestria. What follows in the rest is a long adventure piece, with lots of politics and skulduggery and all that world-building I mentioned before, not to mention explosions and some really excellent action scenes. The story pacing isn’t perfect, but on the scene level, nothing ever felt dragging or overly detailed.
What didn’t work? Well, the humor was kind of hit-and-miss. Shawn does a lot of pop culture referencing, which I have to imagine is true to his show, but wasn’t always appreciated. (Another similarity to Dresden.) Most of what I didn't like was just little things, but there were also a couple of big, sexually-themed “it’s not what you think it sounds like” jokes that I didn’t appreciate. There were a couple spots where the narrative went in a direction I expected and didn’t want; the identity of the noble’s daughter is the big one that comes to mind, though it ultimately was a non-issue. This is one of the few stories I’ve ever seen whose writing is a valley; that is, it starts out fine, gets worse in the middle, and then recovers by the end. I’m not sure what happened there, but having a mostly typo-free ending was appreciated. Also, Shawn thinks Val Kilmer is the best Batman, and that is just not cool. Really, in hindsight, far more worked than didn’t.
Ultimately, whether you read this will come down to two things, and I’ll say this: don’t let the crossover balk you. It’s fine. The HiE stuff at the start is both pat and a bit of a slog, but once you hit the first investigation, it all becomes worth it. I’ll be holding this up as an example of a good crossover for a while.
Recommended
A Bad Plot by Achaian
Reading by Akash the Reader
Genre: Metafic?
After overhearing what she thinks is Rarity and Rainbow Dash deriding her posterior, Twilight goes a little nuts trying to find out the truth. There’s a lot going on in this story, and it’s all baffling; suffice to say, this is an awful lot of work to make a pair of bad jokes. The first is the old fanon standby of “plot = ass”. The second is the book Twilight sharing a name with one of this show’s characters. And that’s more or less all there is to this. You’ve got Twilight acting like an idiot for a few thousand words, a la Lesson Zero. You’ve got a background running gag about Fluttershy that, while humorous in its reveal, is very transparently meant as a red herring/distraction from the main story. Pinkie is admittedly pretty funny in both of her main scenes, and I was amused by Luna’s awkward attempts at the end to be amorous. Oh, and I called this a metafic because I'm pretty sure there's a running thread of comparing the standard story plot -- rising action, climax, all that -- to an orgasm, while both are happening in real time. But honestly, I'm just not sure. Really, I just don’t think this was worth it, though given my opinion on Lesson Zero, I have to imagine the whole fandom will enjoy this story.
Vaguely Recommended
Scootaletter by Poultron
Genre: Flashfic
You know, I had Poultron in my “need to review one story by everyone I follow, but only has incompletes” pile, but he’s also got this story, which I had already read! There’s honestly not much here. It was published before the encoded word limit and doesn’t even hit the minific limit of 400 words, and it’s just a short letter written to Rainbow Dash by Scootaloo. I don’t really get anything out of it, but I’ll say this: he captures the mindset of an excitable six-year-old writing about something she dearly loves. It’s just unfortunate that that mindset is kind of… annoying. You won’t find any deep character reveals or plot twists… or plot at all, really. But if you like slice of life stuff, this won’t take up too much of your time.
Vaguely Recommended
Coming for to Carry Me Home by MillenniumFalsehood
Genre: BiE
I’m reading this piece for the same reason as the last one, though it’s kind of unfair to really critique it since it was apparently a commission. Well, beggars can’t be choosers. This tells the story of Mark Adams, the brony son of a minister, who ends up going through a lot of shit when his parents find out he likes ponies. The approach to bronies here is pretty light; phrases like “He’d watch Rainbow Dash create a Sonic Rainboom later” feel disingenuous in this sort of story, like the author doesn’t really know what MLP fans do in their spare time. Mark’s conversation with his friends likewise feels more like a pastiche than a real discussion. What’s worse, Mark’s dad is pretty much every ultra-religious stereotype rolled into one character: he’s raised his son to be manly, he hates “fags” and of course he won’t stand for any of that sissy, sinful stuff influencing his children. If not for the fact that this purports to be based on real events, it would be comical. And that’s what this really comes down to. The writing isn’t the best and the characters are stereotypes, but real people have gone through real situations like this for the same reasons. I do wish this hadn’t gone the BiE route, because it adds another layer of preposterousness to the whole thing, not to mention cheapening whatever real ills others may have gone through. Then there’s the whole “Celestia as agent of God” thing that just… I really can’t take that seriously. It’s no surprise, though, I knew this wouldn’t appeal to me when I went into it, so I’ve got no one to blame but my own silly OCD.
Recommended Only If You’re Actively Smarting from Your Ultra-Religious Parents Having Found Your Pony Stuff and Thrown the Book at You for It
Hips Don’t Lie by Syeekoh
Genre: Crackfic
Rarity is mesmerized by Adagio Dazzle’s swaying hips. This is actually a pre-Rainbow Rocks fic, written based off the Battle of the Bands promo video, and as such, a few bits of it don’t line up with the movie, which is fine. It’s obviously not meant to be taken seriously, and it’s amusing as-is. I do find it odd that Rarity was picked as the one for the joke to center around; it could have been any of them, honestly. And I kind of feel like the ending joke about Sunset Shimmer eating meat is somewhat funnier than the one all the buildup was for, but that’s just me. This is short and fun, and that’s all I needed.
Recommended If You Like Silly Stuff
Overture by SuperGiantRobot
Reading by Scribbler
Genre: Monologue
Vinyl Scratch tells the story of how she met Octavia. My review shelf is getting me into trouble already. City of Doors reviewed this, and I noted that I had read but not reviewed it myself and had to wonder just why I upvoted a ScratchTavia. (One not tagged Romance, I’ll note.) The draw here is the voicing: it actually sounds like (stereotypical fanon) Vinyl telling the story. Not just being the “I” in something that could just as easily have been third person, but actually relating a tale to an audience sitting right in front of her. Her asides are humorous and she injects a lot of personality into a story that’s basically “I was curious about classical music, went to see it, and it was generally not my scene, except, oh, that cellist was hot”. The buildup makes her getting sappy about everything work even better. And, well, other than the first scene telling us that they got together afterward, this ends up not being a ScratchTavia at all, just an emotional recounting of a musical performance by someone who didn’t expect to get caught up in it. And now I know why I upvoted.
Recommended
Rarity Sprains Her Hoof Applebucking by SuperPinkBrony12
Reading by Goombasa
Genre: Alternate Episode Ending
Story synopsis is right there in the title. I am thoroughly baffled by the existence of this. The “Pony Does X” title, tags, and general setup suggest a crackfic. Instead, we get Rarity spraining her hoof, Applejack taunting her a bit, Applejack taking her to the hospital, and Rarity ending up in a wheelchair for a little while. It’s played completely straight, and I have to wonder what the point is. (That she and Trenderhoof have a sober conversation toward the end of the story might be a clue to the author’s intentions.) I really don’t know who would want to read this, but I suppose it works as a thoroughly realistic “what-if” for Simple Ways. It's certainly not written poorly.
Vaguely Recommended
Spike’s Hoard by Shotoman
Reading by Dr. Wolf
Reading by BigAshRandomVids
Genre: Future Fic
Spike meets the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ newest member ahead of a day filled with crusading. This is the second piece in today’s journal that I would consider a refutation of standard immortality fic tropes. It’s obvious what Spike’s hoard is going to be from the start, but overall the tone is upbeat and the ending happy, if also genuinely touching. I really appreciated the use of fandom characters as descendants of the mane six; I also liked that Pee-Wee shows up, but only as having found Spike centuries after they last parted. The author set out to show that memories of past friends and family make outliving them bearable, and he has done precisely that.
Recommended
I love how "brony son of a minister" sounds like an epithet. :B
Wow, lots of 'R's today. I think I'll hold off for now, though; if I add more to my RiL it'll never forgive me.
2551401
How do you think I feel? D:
I don't understand the reference to SCP 1193
2551403
Overloaded?
Do you know how many of your recommendations are already lingering in my RiL just waiting for me to get to them? You give me a story with a grade of H and I'll add to my collection.
Curses!
My RiL is only just under ~650...
I've gotten yelled at for writing a first person the way you enjoyed the octascratch fic. :c
eeeeeeeeeeeeee
Best Friends Forever was one of my favourites from this time around. Preeetty good, slightly disturbing fic.
Hue. I'm glad you enjoyed my crackfic. I have developed somewhat of a reputation for them, after all.
Yes, I mainly wrote the fic to share the glory of DEM HIPS with all of FimFiction and the reason I chose Rarity was rather simple: I hadn't written a fic with her in a while, and I think out of all of the humane five she'd be the one able to appreciate the female form - straight or otherwise.
As for the Sunset Shimmer eating meat thing, well... that's a personal headcanon of mine that when Sunset Shimmer ended up in Humania and tried meat for the first time, she absolutely loved it. Because meat is fucking awesome. I didn't expect my headcanon to be so well received.
Or to overshadow the rest of the fic. But hey, what're you gonna do?
2551414
It's a giant arm underground that has tons of elbows. Not that it keeps growing, but the overall effect is the same. :B
2551428
Stop writing long stories. D:
2551438
Not everyone knows what they're talking about all the time, even me. :B
I'm trying, I'm trying! I've got some ideas, but I need to work on them a lot before I'm comfortable posting any. Please don't judge me yet...
Also, are you still open to more featured author journal suggestions? I didn't give one eaelier because I have something like 20 EDIT: actually 35... wow good candidates and I couldn't decide how to make the recommendation.
I think for now I'll nominate Horse Voice, since you could probably finish his not-yet-reviewed stuff in just a couple hours, and then
resume failing wildlycalmly consider what to do with the rest.2551482
Nope, I'm done. :B Though I might also do a Pascoite edition, just because I wanna get all his stories "officially" read.
2551484
Dang.... Well, you should still do HV too anyway - his stuff's excellent. Maybe I can
trickcoerceconvince you to hit some of the others at a later date... hmm...*commences plotting*Wait, no, you didn't see that! Nothing of interest here, move along. *whistle*I hope you do a vs of "Contraptionology!", IMO the best AJ fic ever but i would like to read your take on it.
2551404
2551528
I will. It's been on my to-do for a while now...
I always feel a bit smug when a story I just reviewed shows up in one of your review posts right after. It passes pretty quickly, but it is a nice pick-me-up.
Best Friends Forever by Obselescence is one of my favorite pony stories. Just has the right vibe and the ending actually surprised me.
^ Best 'C' rating tag
2551451
I've had a WRITE reviewer that couldn't parse a metaphor before.
I didn't put too much stock in it. Interaction between the narrator/author and the audience is after all a thing. Patrick Rothfuss and Sir Terry Pratchett write like the way you described, and they're an English professor and fucking Terry Pratchett.
Oh my god, that fingers fic. That sounds hilarious and terrible and I don't think I'll be reading it.
I suppose I'll read that Obselescence Twilight and friends fic, though it does sound like one I'd normally stray away from.
That Psych crossover looks interesting, but it's long enough that the best I can reasonably do is RIL it.
I AR FYAMOOSE!
I RIGHT'S REEL GUD!
Aww, aren't you sweet.
No fak u
I am judging them right now because they need to start writing.
So where's that sequel to Whisk, motherfucker?
2551666
I feel it will appeal to a very niche audience. :B And that's okay.
2551867
no fuk u noodlemouse get writ D:
2551931
lol, it's like you expect me to do things or something :V
2551984
The word "noodlemouse" is way funnier than it has any right to be.
2552188
this is why I said it get with the program :|
2552188 Au contraire, it is exactly as funny as it should be and clearly you need to write about it.
I'm gonna sue you
2553799
I have 12 cents in my Paypal account. :D
That fingers fic is absolutely disgusting. I loved it.
2551745 the Psych crossover is one of my favorite things on this entire site. Pretty wonderful world building and a great Shawn Spencer.
2558908 That's a pretty strong recommendation. I suppose I'll move it from Read It Later to my much more exclusive Read It Next shelf.
2558935 I hope it holds up to your expectations. I read the entire thing in one siting. Tell me how it goes!
2551607 you should hurry up.
2551984
This is what I'm calling ferrets from now on
2558935 so how was it?
4211937 "Next" is a very relative statement, in that I still haven't gotten to it.
4211937
I am very confused, because I posted a review blog two days ago, yet here I am, with lots of notes on journals posted one and two years ago. c.c
4212307 this is the review with the psych crossover I asked you about.