Chapter the Second
I continued to look around, taking a moment to realize that there weren’t any watchtowers nearby. Looking around, I noticed that I was right next to an apple orchard, but there was something off about it. “Why is there such a large orchard next to such a small village? The trees aren’t even in straight rows or anything... Not to mention they look more like oak or maple trees instead of regular apple trees...”
Interested, and not to mention more than a little bit hungry, I started roaming the orchard, looking for my favourite kind of apple, the honeycrisp. I saw lots of red delicious and granny smiths, but none of the trees had that red fruit with a bit of yellow to it. “Come on, what’s a dream walker have to do to get some food around here?” I grumbled, looking at the branches high up.
Now, the natural thing to do would be to climb the tree, right? Well, the thing is, being overweight, I’ve never been good at climbing. Big surprise, right? Luckily for me, this was just a dream, so if I concentrated hard enough, I could just make an apple come to me! Brilliant, right? So I just closed my eyes, concentrating on bringing the apples to me. You will come down to me and change into a pizza... You will come down and change into a pizza...
If I had been paying attention, I would have heard the buzzing sound filling the air sooner, and I might have had enough time to move, to hide. As it was, however, I was fated to be knocked unconscious, but not before hearing a young girl with a southern accent shout, “Scoots, look out!”
~=~=~=~=~=~=~
Sweetie Belle groaned as she picked herself up from the grass, complaining. “Aww, colt! Rarity is gonna kill me when she sees these grass stains!”
“Thanks for asking if we’re alright,” Scootaloo grunted as she dusted herself off. She picked up her scooter, checking it over for any damage to her main mode of transportation. “Oh come on! And I just gave Lightning a new paint job!” Scootaloo whimpered, hovering a hoof over the large scratch in the coat of paint.
“Ya named your scooter?” Applebloom asked incredulously, quirking an eye at Scootaloo.
“Hey, don’t judge me! Super Mega Ultra Lightning-Flash Mach 3000 is a totally acceptable name,” Scootaloo shot back, bristling. “Besides, at least I don’t go around painting my dog all orange!”
“Ah didn’t paint Winona orange! If ah wanted an orange dog, ah would have just asked ya to bark!” Applebloom countered, defending herself.
“Oh yeah?” Scootaloo challenged, her head butting against Applebloom’s. “You couldn’t make me bark even if you-”
“Aww... its tail is so fluffy!” Sweetie Belle cooed, hugging the orange creature’s tail to herself. “Can I keep it?! Please please please?!”
“Umm, Sweetie Belle? What the heck is that thing?” Scootaloo questioned, trotting closer to her friend and the unconscious animal.
“Ah don’t know,” Applebloom answered, poking the creature’s torso. “Applejack always told me ta never go near strange animals ah don’t know...”
“But Scoots hit it!” Sweetie Belle protested, moving to show a bruise that was slowly forming on its shoulder. “That makes it our responsibility to heal it back to normal!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed, hugging the fluffy tail to herself once more.
“But what is it?!” Scootaloo asked, poking at the strange animal. It was orange in the body, but it looked like a great deal of its body size was taken up by fur. Its tail was large, and had a fluffy creame color. Around its neck there was a mane the same color as its tail, and on its forehead there was a large tuft of fur as well. Despite being only a tiny bit larger than the Cutie Mark Crusaders, the animal’s ears were twice as long as the fillies at least.
“Strangest dog ah’ve ever seen,” Applebloom admitted, scratching her head.
“I know,” Sweetie said, her eyes brightening. This is two chances to get cutie marks! We could get one in being veterinarians, or on discovering a new species!”
“The second one sounds cooler to me!” Scootaloo said, her eyes bright.
“Yeah, but ah don’t think we’re going ta get our cutie mark in findin’ a new animal if it dies on us,” Applebloom pointed out, nudging the creature, who was still blacked out.
“Psh, come on, it’s not dead! It’s just got a little bruise!” Scootaloo pointed out, rolling her eyes. “See? It’s already healing! All we need is a little ice from the clubhouse, and it’ll be fine!”
“Then come on, girls! Let’s get goin!”
~=~=~=~=~=~=~
Pain... Again. Waking up in pain was starting to get just a little old, but it was only the second time in a row. It’s not like it was a trend... yet.
“Scoots, ah think it’s wakin up!”
Oh great... It’s all coming back to me now... There I was, relaxing under an apple tree, just trying to get an apple to fall from the tree and turn into a pizza... It’s not like I was asking for a miracle! I mean, come on! Turning an apple into a pizza? That should be a piece of cake for a stupid dream to handle, right?!
Mmm... Cake... Okay, screw the pizza for now, now I want cake! I closed my eyes tighter, starting to concentrate, when my brain started to talk to me. Yeah, because you can be knocked unconscious in a dream...
Shut up, Brian, I thought back, trying to keep my focus. Stop trying to use logic on me, it won’t work! It’s a dream! Logic doesn’t work in dreams!
“Excuse me, mister cool monster creature thing? Can you wake up already so we can name you and stuff? We want our Monster Discoverer cutie marks already!”
“Cutie what now?” I asked, opening my eyes.
... Yeah, Brian, you can shut the hell up now. There’s no way in hell this is real. I’m still dreaming, so shut up and go away.
Technicolored horses... I was looking at technicolored horses... Yeah, if that doesn’t spell ‘dream’, then I don’t know what does. I mean, one of them had wings like Pegasus from Greek myths! And then there was the white Unicorn. I mean, okay, white, that’s normal, right? Except for the curly pink and purple... Dang, what’s that hair called on a horse? A mane, I think? Anyway, so there was the white unicorn, the... orange pegasus, and the yellow regular horse. Yeah, okay. And they could apparently talk. Sure, why not? Talking horses, I can buy that in a dream. Okay, Alex, I’ll take ‘original ideas’ for 400, please.
“Huh?” The three horses all looked at each other, confused. Oh, did I mention they have huge-ass eyes? Cause they do. And damn if it doesn’t make them look adorable as all get out. Stupid chibi horses. If anyone did something like that on Earth, I’ll bet they could make a mint off of it.
“Flare... Flareon? What the heck is that supposed to mean?” the orange one questioned, looking to the white unicorn.
“Don’t look at me!” the white one squeaked. Quite adorably, I might add. “I know the dictionary, not the encyclopedia!”
I blinked when I realized what the pegasus had said. Flare... Flareon? Oh no... Hell no. I am not a friggin Flareon! Of all of the Pokemon I could have turned into, I had to turn into one of the eeveelutions I hate the most?! Okay, forget this dream! I am now labeling it a nightmare.
Sure, a lot of people think that Flareons are cool. That they’re cute and cuddly. Well they’re not! They’re stupid fire dogs! Fire sucks. It’s hot. I’m fat, okay? I can only take so many layers off before there’s nothing left to take off. At least with cold you can always just add more layers.
Now dogs... I’m sure most of you love dogs. And it’s not so much that I hate dogs so much as I love cats. I grew up around cats, and my own cat, Patches, lived with me from the time I was born until I was sixteen, seventeen years old. Am I prejudiced? Yeah, so? Everyone, if they’re honest, is prejudiced. At least I’m up front about it.
So yay. I couldn’t turn into an Espeon, or a Glaceon, I had to be a stupid Flareon. Still, it’s ‘only’ a dream, so it’s not like I’m stuck like this for a long period of time, right?
Oh, crap, they’re staring at me! They asked me a question! Quick, Brian, gimme something witty to say!
42
“Forty-two!” I blurt out, my eyes going wide.
“Flareon? That’s your name?” the yellow one questioned, tilting her head to the side.
Did I mention that the yellow one had this adorable red bow that’s, like, twice the size of her head? Cause she does. Assuming that they’re intelligent, given from being able to speak, I feel sorry for anybody if she ever learns how to use puppy eyes, if she doesn’t already know. Heck, that white one might be pretty good at it too.
Oh, shoot, my name! Quickly, I shake my head emphatically, looking around for something to write with. I had only tried speaking a few times, but it seemed clear I was stuck speaking Pokemonese, or whatever it’s called. If I was lucky, though, maybe we wrote the same! I mean, I could still understand them, right? So it was a totally logical conclusion!
I thought that logic didn’t work in dreams, Fire Butt, Brian snarked at me.
Shut up Brian, I wasn’t talking to you! I thought back, trying to shut my brain up.
I heard gasps from the horses as I bounded over to a crudely drawn map, where some crayons were laying on the floor. I swiped the map from the wall, and then tried to grab a crayon, frowning when my paw just bounced off it. Crap, I didn’t think about the whole ‘not having opposable thumbs’ thing would prevent me from writing. Processing... Okay, old school time! Babies have to use two hands to grasp stuff, so I’ll just have to use both paws!
Beaming at my own brilliance, I started to write slowly, trying to keep my terrible penmanship from getting worse from using two paws.
~=~=~=~=~=~=~
“Is that thing... writing?” Scootaloo asked, looking to Applebloom.
“Ah think so,” Applebloom said slowly, trying to move her head to the side to look around the creature’s neck mane.
“Aww, look at it bobbing up and down as its tail wags back and forth!” Sweetie Belle cooed. “It’s so cute! It’s like it’s listening to music in its head or something!”
“Alright, girls, ah’m back from Canterlot!” Applejack yelled, trotting up the plank to the clubhouse.
“Sis, sis, guess what?” Applebloom exclaimed, running out of the clubhouse excitedly. “We discovered a new animal! He’s super fluffy, and he’s really smart, and he can write!”
“Y’all discovered what now?” Applejack asked, quirking an eyebrow, walking faster. “What have ah told you about strange animals, Applebloom?”
“But ah just wanted mah Animal Discoverer cutie mark!” Applebloom whined in protest, her pupils growing larger. “He’s all friendly and stuff too! He’s not dangerous!”
“He?”
“Well, ah, ah think it’s a he. Can’t really tell, but when it talked it sounded like a stallion!” Applebloom explained, opening the door.
“Dibs!”
“Dibs on what, Sweetie?” Applejack inquired, tilting her head to the side.
“Dibs on Fluffy!” she declared, pointing at the large, orange dog-like animal. “I found him after Scoots crashed into him, I was the first to take care of him, and I love him the most! He’s got different kinds of fur on his body and tail, and that takes different kinds of shampoo, and only Rarity keeps those kinds in stock all the time!”
“Aww, but come on!” Scootaloo protested, her ears falling. “I hit him, and that means it’s up to me to make it better!”
“But now he’d be afraid of ya,” Applebloom pointed out, defending Sweetie’s ‘Dibs’. “So that would leave either Sweetie or ah ta take care of him, and since ah’ve already got a dog, we don’t need need him as badly as Sweetie Belle does. ‘Sides,” she finished, saving her most important piece of debate for last. “She already called Dibs. Everypony knows ‘bout the unversal Dibs Protocol!”
“And the No Take-Backs Accord!” Sweetie chirped, her eyes glowing as she realized she already won the argument.
“But... but... You have to promise that he can be the crusader’s mascot, though!” Scootaloo protested, crossing her forelegs.
“Thank you!” Sweetie Belle cheered, hugging Scootaloo tightly. “You’re the best friend a filly could have, Scoots!”
“Um, girls? Ah think this isn’t a normal animal,” Applejack said slowly, crouching down defensively over the fillies. “Bloom, ah need you ta get Twi as fast as you can. If she doesn’t know what it is, then we should take it to the princess as soon as possible.”
~=~=~=~=~=~=~
Friggin finally! The stupid crayons only broke, like, a dozen times while I tried to write. Do you know how hard it is to write with super brittle crayons when you have to use two paws, and that usually means more pressure? It’s really damn hard, that’s how hard it is! Anyway, so I finally finished. I was so proud of myself, sadly. I had done my best to write eloquently, to help show that I was more intelligent than my now-limited vocabulary reflected.
I grabbed the message with my mouth, so that I could walk normally. I turned around, proud of myself, only to see a larger horse in a defensive stance above two of the three smaller ones. Okay, so the smaller ones are kids. I guess that makes sense. Wait, where did the third one go?
The white one with the horn trotted up to me fearlessly, her eyes wide with curiosity as she read my message. Crap, some of the words might go over her head if she’s not that old...
“Fluffy? Were you trying to write? Silly boy, that’s not how you draw letters! Oh wait, were you drawing a picture? It’s, um, very nice!” she said, trying to be encouraging. To me, however, the fact that our languages were different translated into only one word for me.
Fffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
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2130149 What this guy said.
Really, what's up with this? I've already seen like fifteen Pokemon fictions pop up in the recent stories section. Not that I have a problem with it... oh well. I guess it's just a phase, then. It will die out eventually.
Interesting story you got here.
You're writing style is a bit different at times, almost sounds like a casual conversation with yourself (which it does end up being at times)
A few parts here and there are confusing, and a little more clarification would be nice (provide more detail, ect,.)
Pacing could be slowed down a little more as well.
Hopefully you do actually work on this, and don't just take the cliche stupid path most people do.
Don't let me down!
Also, how can you hate a Flareon?
It's adorable!
img-cache.cdn.gaiaonline.com/a2ccf10a4a7cea9e92aaf8ed5ebc90bb/http://i297.photobucket.com/albums/mm220/bea36/Flareon_fla.png
2131841 Except that the difference btw. you and he is that he (from what I could tell) just insta-down voted for what it was, rather than how it was written. I was just wondering what it was about Pokemon in Equestria that was so fascinating, so I'm trying it out, to see if I can work out what it is about it. Is it just that it's Pokemon? The style of narration? So I'm comparing stats between this and other stories, my other fic, stuff like that. There's only one other Pokemon fic I've seen that has tried the whole "Pokemon can't talk to ponies" thing, and even then, I don't know if it's because the character has no mouth yet, or if they're following the Pokeverse. (Beldum don't have mouths, so I don't know how that story is going to do it.)
So I guess this is just an experiment for me. I also have never done a first person style fic before, so I'm trying to expand myself and push myself to be a better writer, you know?
2131889 No, it... that... it's complicated! Just because I would love to HAVE one doesn't mean I would like to BE one. Then again, that's going to be a recurring theme in this fic. Humans popping up as Pokemon that don't match their personality, or not what they wanted, etc.
And yeah, I'm sorry about the details, the pacing, etc. I've always had trouble with details, so that's probably part of it, but I've also never done a first person fic before, so I don't... This is all experimental for me, I guess is the best way to explain it. I am trying hard on this fic, to grow, so if there's something in particular you can say needs better explaining, or description, please don't hesitate to say what. Thanks, and hope you enjoy it!
Wait! Sorry, before I forget again, what exactly are you afraid of happening? What is the 'cliche' path you're afraid of, so I know what to avoid? There's a LOT of cliches for a HiE, and I'm not sure which one(s) you're referring to.
Flareon IS cute, and I'd like to HAVE one, but I'm a cat at heart, and it's even my Japanese Zodiac sign, so that's why I wouldn't like being a Flareon. That, and the excessive hair treatments needed. I like to brush, not BE brushed. XD
Great chapter interesting way to meet the crusaders. Will more people turned into Pokemon be showing up? Will he ever find a way communicate?
2131889
Flareon would be an awesome Pokemon if it had any decent moves. Seriously, it has a massively high attack stat, but doesn't learn Flare Blitz? Bullshit!
2132195 Yes, more people will be showing up as Pokemon. XD 'I' just happened to be one of the first to show up near a populated area. As to the last one... Well, just wait for the next chapter. XD I mean, *I* (Even though it's a self-insert, it's not a perfect self-insert.) am intelligent, and there are other means of communicating with people than with just words and speech. X3
I might have another chapter today, actually, depending on how it goes.
2132219 Yeah, exactly. I'm a Special Attack kind of guy, so I don't like Flareon because of that as well. I MAY be messing with the move sets, though, what with being human and all.
2131911
I understand, mate.
Also, by cliche path, I meant the usual 'Person shows up as pony/human/other thing and is found by pony/human/other thing and is sent to princess/other thing.'
And then after that happens, some pony/other thing is either behind all of it, or causes havoc afterward, and then the new character is considered a hero.
You already made somebody behind all of it, but that doesn't necessarily make it bad. It helps it make more sense actually.
The way you have it right now is nice, and definitely different from some of the other ones I've read, but I feel some things could be improved on in general.
You've done pretty good so far, and I hope you eventually get better at it!
Hm, great story. Hope you're not hating on Eeveelutions there sir... Also, a Brain named Brian. +100 Girth points for imaginative. 2132219 But it can learn Flame Charge which increases speed and Fire Fang which has a chance for flinching the opponent. Combine that with Attack stat and you've got speed, attack, and chance of flinching. You also seem to be forgetting it can learn Giga Impact. Though not a good choice of moves if you ask me...
This should have more views than it does, its amazing.
2132384 XD Are you kidding? Eeveelutions are my favourite! I'm going to include the two fakemons I've designed so far in the Author's Note of the next chapter, and let you guys vote on if they should be allowed in the fic or not.
Brian... XD Lawlz, Brian exists because I have minor Disgraphia, both with writing as well as typing. (It's Dyslexia for writing, if you couldn't figure it out.)
I just don't like Flareon because I'm a Special Attack kind of guy, which is part of why I love Espeon and Glaceon so much. (Personality tests actually tell me I should be a Snow Espeon, which is what my 'real' Pokesona is. Why I'm a Flareon instead will be explained later in the story, but I'm not going to spoil it... X3
2132370 Then I hate to say that, to some extent, this is going to be cliche. Sorry, but do you really think that Pokemon just showing up out of nowhere in increasing numbers is going to be something that the Princesses, or Twilight, are going to ignore? I sure hope not! That would be incredibly ignorant and stupid on their part. The following is story spoilers, though, so don't scroll over the it if you're not interested.
Yeah, 'I' meet the Princess later. No, I'm nothing special compared to anyone else. The cast of characters is actually going to grow quite large, and it will take a combination of Pokemon, and ponies, to face the threat that Equestria will find itself under. Hopefully you'll be fine with how it's handled, but what you're asking me to avoid would be highly out of character and naive of the Princess not to check out. You don't just ignore a new, intelligent species that appears out of nowhere and hope for the best.
2132442 I don't see why you should have a vote when it is your story. Though... I think fakemon may drive some people away. Not entirely sure but I am just saying. Also, hoping to see more of Brian!
2131892 I get it. I forgot to up vote, by the way. Good story!
2132442
Not entirely what I meant, but what you meant is what I was hoping for.
It does make an entire amount of sense, and what I was looking for and really glad about is the fact that you mentioned that the main characters wasn't entirely 'special' to the point where it would muck up the entire story.
And what I meant by being shown to the Princess is some ridiculous thing like she knew it all along, or one single person being sent to her (like if only ONE person became a Pokemon EVER in the whole story)
Since it's really more of a wider amount of people than just a small select few, it definitely makes sense to bring it up.
I don't mean to confuse you or anything, but we are on the same page here. (Trust me- it may not look like I am, but I am. This kinda thing happens to me way more often than it should.)
2132735 No, I get it. I'm bad at explaining some things, so I understand, yeah.
2132818
I feel you, man!
EDIT: I also may be able to make some cover art, I don't think I can though.
Depends, really.
2132849 Well, feel free to try! I just chose that because it was a commission I received, and I knew I had permission to use it. XD (That, and I hoped the neonesque appearance would be interesting.)
I'm interested in seeing what way this develops.
Ya know, I always thought of the eeveelotions as cats, not dogs. I mean look at them, they basically scream "I am a cat!"
2131889 I thought he turned into a Growlith before he specified what species he was to be honest.
2310094 Sorry. Growlithe have black stripes, so I thought my description would be enough, sorry.
Hey, you know that Flareon? Well I called second on it. That means it's mine again!!!
Can honestly say was not expecting a reference from there!! Which reminds me, I need to order Season ten tomorrow.....and season one of FiM!
Thank you Amazon.com!!!
2487761 X3 I'm behind several seasons myself. Things just got so complicated, it seems... But yes, I'm a moderate Blue vs. Red fan. Especially Caboose!
2621583 Good to know my misery is being enjoyed by all!
(Seriously, make fun of my misery. I enjoy people mocking my/his pain. XD At least then I know you're enjoying the story!)
I felt a Sarge reference coming in
“She already called Dibs. Everypony knows ‘bout the unversal Dibs Protocol!”
“And the No Take-Backs Accord!”
Did...did you seriously just make a Red vs Blue referral?!?!?! HAHA! Genius! Well done! xD
3127797 Eeyup! What's the point of a HiE fic if there isn't a gratuitous amount of vague references?
Hope you keep enjoying it!
love the RVB reference!
3127922
Exactly! No HiE is complete without conspicuous amounts of Earthling references.
Ya named your brain?
...I think you meant 'brain' there...not that you needed any meta in this story...
P.S. Eevee and their related evolutions are based on FOXES!
“Ah didn’t paint Winona orange! If ah wanted an orange dog, ah would have just asked ya to bark!” Applebloom countered, defending herself.
OH SHIT! SCOOTALOO JUST GOT BURNED SON! OH NO SHE DIDN'T!
I was literally trying not to laugh so hard that I'd wake up my family. That comeback was da bomb dawg! Seriously! Scootaloo's reaction should have been to tackle Applebloom or something else not calm because she will NEVER come up with a come back half as witty, punchy, and cheeky and only physical violence will let her walk away with some dignity.
I know you snuck a red vs blue joke in with sweetie saying dibs.
5745304 Well, it isn't like I tried very hard to hide it. XD
Frick you, recently-flareon-dude. All eeveelutions rule.
(Eevee is the best though)
Well I'm an idiot I thought the Flareon was a "she"
2621583
Same
,
yeah unfortunately that's not how lucid dreams work in real life :/, Lucid Dreaming is like battling your sub-Consciousness over what is possible and not, if your sub-Consciousness believes something is not realistic then it wont happen regardless how much you want it to happen. you have to use tricks in order to fool your sub-Consciousness into having something happen. concentrating hard enough does not do anything but make you wake up.
if you wanted pizza I would have just made the motion of reaching into my pocket to conjure a phone, then ordered pizza, and opened any door to get the pizza from the delivery person, or i would have just ask any random person on the street and they would have happily pulled one out of their pockets for you.