Sartarus
Joined 22nd Jan, 2012 ·
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- Zap Transfer · 12k words · 18 2 · 1.3k views
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who voted this so low, the writing is good and the author is just getting started.
Geze, some people talk the talk but don't walk the walk. Give the author time to get a chapter or two more out before rating, 'swat i usual do after tracking a new story, you can't get a story's feel from one chapter this short (no offense to the author) 
160924
I know exactly why they voted so low: they saw the sex/gore label and thought I was gonna jump straight into it.... You gotta give time for a story to develop, people!!
160938
exactly, i ain't here for the clop, actually i'll probably end up skipping that, I'm here for a story. If you want quick clop I've been told liquid rainbows has something more along those lines, but if you're here for plot development and storytelling, stick around, this looks like it'll get good.
160945
Well, I... uhh... I've had bad experiences with fics, thats why I'm kind of apprehensive about the sex....
I'll do my best, but you have to know, I'm new to the pony scene, and I'm still learning!
160952
Like i said, It ain't gonna bother me. Besides, I'm here for the story not the plot (pun intended)
160955
Why am I still commenting and not working on chapter 2?!
160958
probably because i'm a very good distraction. Now git to it,,
Um... if that's alright with you.
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/Fluttershy_Kick.gif
160958
DO IT NOW!!
160962
160960
Of course!! now stop distracting me and let me do what i (attempt to) do best!
160975
Got it.
Not bad. This is unusually happy for something that has a very grimdark description and title.
I wonder what will happen down the road. Maybe I just misinterpreted the theme of the story. I really hope I did.
161109
Well, I'm hoping this story will be quite a bit longer... Don't know if I can make it last as long as i want it to though.... Don't worry, it'll turn grimdark soon enough.
161116
My fears have been confirmed. This is not going to be as lubby dubby as I wanted it. Alright... hit me with your best shot in your next update.
161199
No can do, need more buildup before we get to the darker stuff~
161202
I like that. An author with respect for backstory and plot. I like you...
My stars. Take them all.
Hmmm...Happy.
Too happy...
I can feel a storm of Grimdark flowing all over this story. *tracks*
Nice chapter. The intimacy was nice but I still look forward to what Scratch is hiding.
Plot development is best development.
167494
Well, about what Scratch is hiding, she doesn't even know she's hiding it yet. It won't happen for a little while.
not bad
I like dis. The dark tag, however, is frightening.
180267
We're almost done here.
Things will be getting a little hectic from here on out!
Heheh... Looking forward to the future...
It's hard for me to be a fan of Grimdark...usually because it's done in excess
but with your awesome writing i think you can pull it off help yourself to all of my stars.
The Setup is perfect! I find myself wishing the story to accelerate, but yet i enjoy the suspense, and the threat of the storm to come is both nerve-racking and much anticipated. Yet again you prove the fact that you are a very good writer
I'm scared of what's to come..that dark tag terrifies me.
160945
my only remaining question is, where da buck did the alicorn come from?!?!?
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/158/605/129902783169-dat_plot.jpg
just kidding haha, I actually try to avoid clop fics and gore fics but i got here off one of the "if you liked this story then these may interest you:" things and read some of this. It's really good so i'm now tracking
225877
Natural phenomenon??? to be honest, you're the first person to ask that question
Also, i will NOT explain where she came from, but i WILL explain why what happens, happens.... and it wont be pretty..... i feel bad for creating her just to do THAT....
227437 I presume that that is because it takes the well educated to notice these things
jk I was just curious because well you know there are only two other alicorns in the universe and they kinda happen to be like gods
227582
Actually, that kind of plays into why what happens to her happens.
Not_bad.jpg
The only thing I didn't really like so far is that you choose to make her an Alicorn. Alicorn usually means royalty, and while there's people that use them anyways, it's hard to just see them as "normal" ponies regardless
Though not bad at all
-Glassed
235014
Like I told Conventrix, this WILL be resolved in the most humane way that I know possible.....
Again, that depends on your definition of the word "Humane"
...Aaaaaaaaand I think I'm about to find out why there's a dark tag.
Oh, Scratchy, why? You were my favorite...
269292
NOW I FEEL BAD!!! 
269317 No, don't! I'll be fine!
I like this plot. I'm only left to wonder and feel threatened by that scary Dark tag. I await your next chapter.
Great chap sar! For some reason when kiki was yelling i pictured with fluttershys rage face
but now i see what you meant on skype. Sadness D: what makes me feel better is the fact that there both drunk. I think...
Awww, i feel really bad for Kiana...
I hope i'll be able to read the next chap soon! Awesome story!
I posted this comment EARLIER then first
Edit: sar why you make a sad story! Well i feel bad for kiki... I wonder... Will you do a prologue?
That would be awesome. I loved it sar, and i cant wait for you to start updating butterflies. You truly have a lot of talent!
What a way to go. I can honestly say I didn't see THAT coming. I liked this story, it had a scary tone surrounding it, in a good way. Like you kinda never knew what was going to happen.
Like, I thought Kiana would go into a depression and plan to get back at Vinyl. By either killing her and or Octavia(explaining the dark tag), or sleeping around in some way to fill the void. But straight up suicide? Wow. I had a story were Carrot Top was suicidal, and the only one keeping her around was Cheerilee. You sir or madam, are a brilliant author. I just wish this lasted a little bit longer, and Kiana and Derpy got together and have a happy ending.
All in all, favorite, thumbs up, and a waffle (o_o)>#
Wait a minutes... This chapter was tagged with a "Read"-mark... The start to the next chapter confused me a bit, so I came back. Wonder what happened.
Oh well, onto the last chapter
-Glassed
Wow, what a way to go. If this was gonna go on for a bit longer, I would have thought that Kiana and Vinyl got back together, but for it to end on the "Dark"-tag... wow just, wow
Brilliant story Sar, even if it was a bit short!
Having the entire universe against you must be though...
-Glassed
Either way, I type this while eating a delicious honeybun. And I must say... BRAVO! I can honestly say that I loved every bit of what I was reading!
Keep up the brilliant work!
273302>>273498>>274995
Well, the title of the story IS "Scratched Out."
What? You guys thought it would end happy? Psh. Sometimes I wonder about my fans....
275793 The title is pretty self explanatory now that I look at it...
However, one should never judge a story by its' title. Even the worst of situations can have a highlight or silver lining.
Nicely executed, Sartarus. It was a ride from the start and ended just the way I would want from a story like this.
I thought it would be dark...my brain was geared towards some inevitable violence.....SUDDENLY....SAD. blew my mind and hit all that much harder for it. can't say it might have been a little of a sudden ending but it makes it stand out that much more I guess great plot twist great job!
Not really worth the mature tag.
I'm SO depressed right now..
Another writer to make my sad today. Congrats.