Stinky Pie

by NocturneD85

Chapter 1

Another beautiful day in Ponyville. The birds were chirping, wind was blowing, flowers blossoming. All the ponies were enjoying their day.

Pinkie Pie woke up to greet the day and rushed off to start making desserts. She made her quota for the morning. Mrs. Cake came into the kitchen to stop at the doorway then sniffed the air, "Pinkie did you take a bath this morning? It stinks awful in here.”

Pinkie sniffed her armpit ignoring the wavy lines coming from it. She smiled, "Nope."

Mrs. Cake bewildered by this, “Pinkie Pie you know hygiene is important.”

"I know. I brushed my teeth this morning." Pinkie smiled.

"How come they're still yellow?" Mrs. Cake frowned.

"I just ate yellow frosting silly." Pinkie bounced and bounced, the wavy lines followed her.

"Pinkie Pie, I'm ordering you to brush your teeth and take a shower!" Mrs. Cake shouted while trying to cover her nose.

Pinkie sighed in defeat and walked slowly out the kitchen, "Alright..." The pink stinky pony walked up the stairs and entered the bathroom. She walked right up to the mirror and pulled out her toothbrush, she accidentally slammed her elbow into the sink and dropped the toothbrush into the toilet.

Pinkie moaned, "I'll just use Mr. Cakes." She took his toothbrush and scrubbed her teeth repeatedly until they looked decent. She banged her elbow again and dropped Mr. Cake's toothbrush into the toilet. She beamed at the toilet angrily and pulled out the toothbrushes then threw them into the sink. She looked for her deodorant but could not find it. She would use Mr. Cakes but she already used his toothbrush. She walked over to the bathtub and turned tried to turn on the water only to find that line was broken.

She found bathroom spray and sprayed it all over her self. "There. Now I smell like flowers!" She clapped happily. More like crappy flowers.

Pinkie Pie went outside and the spray wore off instantly. She bounced happily through out Ponyville unaware that her B.O. is killing the plant life. This pissed Applejack off as her apple trees died once Pinkie set foot on her property. Applejack sniffed the pink pony and wretched in disgust. "Pinkie Pie you smell worse than my cows! Worse than granny Smith’s perfume!”

"Oh don't be like that silly." Pinkie smiled.

"No seriously you smell!" Applejack protested.

"That's mean!" Pinkie argued.

"Just get the hell out of here!" Apple Jack fumed.

"Okay..." Pinkie put up no fight and bounced the other way.

Then she came across Fluttershy's cottage to find the yellow Pegasus tending to her animals.

"Hi Fluttershy!” Pinkie waved.

Just then, the singing birds fell over and died.

Fluttershy held her nose closed, "Oh... hey Pinkie."

"What are you doing?" Pinkie asked.

"To bury my animals.” Fluttershy sighed.

"Do you need help?" Pinkie asked.

"Unless you want to go in the ground too." Fluttershy mumbled.

"I'll take that as a no." Pinkie bounced to her next destination.

The boutique where the fashion Etta resided. Pinkie knocked on the door

Rarity answered it and found it was Pinkie and she smelled very bad today. Rarity scrunched her face, “Oh hello Pinkie darling.”

"Do you need any help?" Pinkie asked.

A gust of wind picked up and Rarity got a blast of BO into her nose. She threw up and passed out on the floor.

"I guess no then." Pinkie turned around and looked for Rainbow Dash.

Apparently, the rainbow pony was hiding again. She traveled more and did not notice the disgusted ponies. Then she went to Twilight Sparkle and knocked on her door. Twilight was prepared this time she had stink spray, air fresheners and scented candles at her disposal. She opened the door and found Pinkie. At this time, Pinkie had flies rotating around her.

"Hey Pinkie." Twilight put on a gas mask.

"Every pony is acting weird today. It's like they're insulting me saying I smell." Pinkie pondered.

Twilight beamed, "Really? Don't think it might have to do with your hygiene?"

Pinkie tapped her own chin, "Mmmm... Nope."

"Jesus Christ Pinkie that bum outside smells better than you. And he smells like dead animals." Spike peak his head through the door.

Pinkie then started to cry. "Do I really smell that bad?”

"YES!" Just then, the other friends came along and watched Pinkie bawl all over the ground.

"I'm sorry... I'll take a bath." Pinkie cried.

"The water line is broken in our area Pinkie." Twilight reminded her.

"I got an idea." Rainbow Dash smirked.

In addition, with that Rainbow Dash made Pinkie go through the carriage wash with no carriage. Figuring a light clean should do it. She put in seven bits for the wash to start. Dash and the others watched from the window watching the carriages go by and found Pinkie blasted with high-pressured water and soap.

"Won't that hurt her?" Twilight asked, "Let alone kill her?"

"Nah. She's a tough pony." Dash waved off.

"And yet no pony stopped us from doing this?" Applejack asked.

Pinkie came out the other end was dried by the carriage wash employees. She was all fluffy, clean and smelled like a new carriage. Thanks to Jose putting an air fresher around her neck. Pinkie smiled and bounced happily to her friends. Rarity liked this and wanted to go through the carriage wash as well. She wanted the best wash. Dash put in ten bits for the supreme special wash. The ponies watched Rarity go through the carriage wash as Pinkie did earlier only with some additions. It was all smiles at first until the hot wax come on. The ponies screamed in horror as Rarity came out the other end with barely any fur and hair left just blisters and blood patches.

Pinkie walked up to Spike, "Take a letter Spike. Dear princess Celestia. Today I learned that while outside should not be judged and the inside should. The outside still covers hygiene. Ignoring it, will only affect how your friends and every pony around you will think that you cannot take care of yourself or do not care. Brush twice a day and after every meal. Use deodorant before you go out. Comb your hair. Do not let ponies think you just woke up. Sincerely Pinkie Pie. PS. The car wash is super fun! "

"Was it okay I wrote it on a napkin?" Spiked asked.

"AH I'M A FREAK!" Rarity cried in pain. "CALL AN AMBULANCE!"

"Thanks for choosing Carl's Carriage Wash." Jose put an air freshener around Rarity's horn.

Author's Note:

Yeah just another random story. No real reason for it to exist and me really not giving a damn. So enjoy this mindless dribble and don't forget to give it a thumbs down. Or an up if you're into that sort of thing. Also this story is meant to be stupid, brainless and a just something to waste time on if you are not also disgusted. Spelling and grammar are bad in this and yet I don't care for this one. So if you say grammar/spelling is bad, give yourself a round of applause because I already know.

Comments

[Kalreas]

Well...
images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/2/4/1/7/1/2/3/alrighty-then-92437230886.jpeg

((Insert incomprehensible babbling here.)) - Sorin "Kalreas" Kanire.
Fun.

[NocturneD85]

1865591 that's alright, story had no point

[Kalreas]

1865598
Fun.
Fun.
Fun.
Fun.
Fun.
Fun.
Fu-
it. Whatever it is the Pinkie clones say, this is just for it.
And you did it well.

[404]

You done good Nocturne, you done good.

[Totallyrandomdude]

What did I jus- Why di- This- Wuh- Happened?

[NocturneD85]

1865621 you just read the stupidest thing on my story list. round of applause for our brave reader

[Xcelll]

Why, Nocturne? Why?

[The Princess Rarity]

Stupid enough for me to fave. Good job.

[Aczom]

This is pretty funny, even though it's filled with spelling mistakes and is also pretty stupid. I loved the Fluttershy part!

[The Guy on Your Right]

Awesome. Since pinkie is smelly in this story I must make sure that in my comment she is still smelly. So a barfing pinkie with an awesome mustache should do the trick.

[honeyhoneyhoney]

[NocturneD85]

1866649

[Lazygamer313]

Pinkie Pie leans that good hygiene makes everypony happy.

(Probably the stupidest thing you'll ever read)

snarksquad.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/ohmy.png

HA! Nicely done my friend, never knew you had the power to make some really weird random comedy. Loved the ending, that'll teach Rarity to not be like Pinkie Pie, thinking that one can simply defy the laws of physics as easy as her. For a pony so see another pony being hairless must be like us seeing a bear that is hairless like the pic below....
i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/3513/slide_3513_49627_large.jpg

[NocturneD85]

1867517>>well hot wax was added into Rarity's wash

[theYasha]

you would thunk fluttershy would have a different reaction to her precious birds dying. Something like this maybe:

[Lazygamer313]

1867634
Didn't make her coat shinier, that's for sure

[Kunnka-Kun]

I demand that Jose become a canon character.

[Papillon Rose]

"Unless you want to go in the ground too." Fluttershy mumbled.

[Evil Paladin]

Rarity's go through the carwash was the best part.
Do another chapter where the princesses go through the car wash! (I can already see Luna or Cadence groaning when it begins to rain when they get out of the wash)

[nemryn]

The description promised stupidity, and it delivered

[NocturneD85]

2411392 it delivers what it promises

[Godzillawolf]

Funny little random one shot, nice job!

[NocturneD85]

2690029>>thank you

[strangephantasm]

I'm certain that carriage wash is a front for illegal activities.

derpicdn.net/img/2013/9/29/437351/thumb.jpeg