• Member Since 15th Jan, 2023
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

Khampostel


A simple computer professional from unknown lands. Interested in magic and science. (Discord: khampostel#3300)

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"A distant vision. Between midnight and noon, Trixie Lulamoon embarks on a haunting mini-adventure to rescue her friend Starlight, whose fate is trapped beneath dark pyramids of paperwork and a demanding workload."

Chapter index and release schedule

Warning: this fanfic comes from a Spanish version, translation errors may be found, your understanding is expected.

Cover created by Midjourney (AI) and edited by Khampostel.

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 10 )

Nice so far.

Hope you make more of this.

11746122
True, I have a calendar for the publications of the next chapters on my blog:

https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/1025090/the-exordium-under-the-pyramids

I did started reading it, despite a few weird turn of phases and a little lack of context, along with the occasional, mistakes which sort of gives me the impression your are not a English native speaker, you do a good job with creating an expansive atmosphere or wonder. I might suggest you try out a text to speech program like Balabolka(yes it's totally free) and proofread your own context to the minor mistakes and discrepancies.

11790712
Thanks for the comment, I am aware of the errors you mention, unfortunately I am not an English speaker, so I have to resort to other tools for translation. (I'm very bad at English...sad :pinkiesick:)

Regarding the phase changes, I think they give an air of uncertainty to the reader, since the situation can vary from one moment to the next, even so I make an effort to maintain a line of thought in each chapter, concentrating on one or group of characters per part. .

The context, well I wouldn't want to fill my entire story with lore that probably doesn't cause interest, so there is the drop of mystery, as the story progresses more details are explained.

Thanks again for the advice!

I liked this.

You said that you wanted some comments, so here you go.

This one caught my attention, read the prolonged is intense yet interesting. I'll read the rest as I go.

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