Writing is surprisingly satisfying.
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Pound is finally ready to make his first Hearts and Hooves Day card. He’s got everything he needs: craft supplies, a caring, supportive sister, and the love of his life.
What do you mean I only needed two of those?
Cover art by Doodlinjaz
Entered into the February’21 Found Out February Contest
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10701785
Thanks, mate! Appreciate the comment.
D'aww, that was cute!
And I think the downvotes are from the combination of "cute, but eww, incest" and "where's the clop?" complainers. "OK with Cakecest even if not clop" is probably a niche audience.
10703022
I never thought about the "I want more clop" faction. I figured there were just a lot of fictional incest haters. Thanks!
This has to be the most adorable Pound & Pumpkin Cake love story I've read!
10703122
Thanks for the support, mate! Hope you enjoyed.
10703138
I did, it cracked me up that the card color scheme didn't tip off Pumpkin Cake when she noticed the the colors.
10703142
Who's to say it wasn't meant for Apple Bloom? That would have been an awkward conversation.
10703175
Kinda forgot about Applebloom
10703222
Oof. Farm mare feels sad now.
10703230
Kinda focused on pumpkin cake and her thinking her brother was going for sweetie belle
10703259
That's fair. I'll give Apple Bloom her time to shine in another story.
Okay, as this story stands at the end of the contest, I don’t consider it all that successful. If there’s a romance element to a story, it has to be sold well. The readers have to be convinced that the characters actually love each other. I really didn’t get any of that here. There’s no explanation for why these two have romantic feelings for each other, they just blatantly state that they do. If anything, I actually liked Pumpkin less and less as the story went on for her ridiculous jealousy and possessiveness. I could have bought that Pound would be interested in Sweetie Belle for her looks alone, since he wouldn’t actually have any experience in romance, but that was just a bait and switch. So it kind of hurts the integrity of the story to base the central premise on a relationship that’s poorly explained. Also, there’s really no “found out” element to this. Their parents discussing that they might have a crush on each other is not the same as someone actually catching them doing the incest. Slight positives… maybe are that I kinda chuckled like once or twice. And I did get thrown off a bit by Pound’s lying, he did a decent job at selling his excuse. But really, this story is just way too short and underdeveloped for what it seems to be trying to go for.
10703353
Thanks for the input! I'll be the first to admit that it's far from perfect, but I ultimately wanted to practice my jealousy scenes since it's such a pivitol aspect of many stories. Also the fact that I spent three days writing this probably didn't help.
Either way, I really appreciate the feedback and will definitely use it to improve. Hope you had fun anyways!
10703367
Practice is definitely good. And I’m glad if my feedback helps at all.
10703385
Are you one of the judges? I'm just getting to know my overlords.
10703352
Funny idea I might try
An Applebloom and Diamond Tiara shipping (Diamond is jealous of Applebloom and it leads to more.)
10703697
I'm not very familiar with Diamond Tiara's character, but I'll keep it in mind.
10703044
"Fictional incest haters?" Those are called normal people, my guy. "It's not real incest, because the incest is between fictional characters!" Get ahold of yourself.
10704535
To each their own. Props to you for helping that girl through her problems, though.
Mad respect for that!
10704558
Which girl?
10704572
The one that came to you for help about her dad a few weeks ago. Have you thought about a career in therapy?
10704587
I have, actually. I'm still not sure which girl in particular you're referring to, because I've helped a lot of people with similar problems and I'm losing track of time. I'm in college at the moment taking classes to become a family therapist. I firmly believe that the instability of the traditional family is the root cause of all the problems in the modern world. So I want to help in the best way I can. And the gradual normalization of incest in culture definitely does not help. I'm supposed to cherish women, not look at my sister like a sexual object. That leads to cases like the woman you mentioned.
(Keep in mind: I should cherish women, not progressive, selfish, High-T, defective Pokemon. And by the same token, men do not deserve to be praised by simply being men. Respect is something you earn, and part of being respectable is rejecting anything portraying incest as something fun, risqué, or acceptable.)
10704663
That's an interesting mindset, but please understand that not everyone shares the same ideals. You can still judge others how you see fit, but please refrain from harming or insulting them as it does nothing but add to the hatred and animosity of the modern world. Therapy is about healing and recovery, not single-minded admonishment.
10704782
Being kind is not always about being nice. And healing doesn't mean doing whatever the patient wants. This isn't about a difference of opinion over what fast food place is best. This is about having sex with your brother and sister, or father and mother, or son and daughter, or any of the extended family. Not everyone shares the same ideals about incest? Fine. I have no sympathy for them. They have a problem, and it needs to be fixed, but not by saying incest is okay.
10704809
I'm glad we both know where each of us stands. If you really feel that strongly about this, I'd recommend checking the story descriptions first and clicking off anything you find unacceptable.
It was fun talking to you!
10704818
I specifically clicked on this story to read the description. Then it turned out to be about incest, and I wanted to try and have you see reason. But I suppose you've talked to people who hate incest before. You probably knew what I would say, but you wouldn't change as a result of anything I can do.
10704826
That's what descriptions are for! I'm glad it helped.
10704828
I really hope I never see you again.
10704663
I agree
10703741 Google search diamond Tiara and you will probably recognize her as the tormentor of the cmc
10705330
I know of her, but I didn't watch many episodes with her in it, so I wouldn't be able to write her personality well.
Well written.
I enjoyed it very much.
10716420
Thanks, mate! Happy reading!
10704809
It's just a story. It's not hurting anybody, is it? Also, I don't remember sex ever being mentioned. That isn't mandatory in a relationship. I certainly enjoyed the interesting dynamic it had.
10704830
I don't... sigh... I don't want to be rude, so I'll just stop myself there...
10760134
I appreciate the support, but it's not worth arguing anymore. Both of us have already said everything that needed to be said.
My Little Reviews & Feedback I did your review.
10764886
Thanks for your thoughts!
A review for YOU.
10830588
Thanks for the review! I definitely could have done better with this one, but it's all part of the learning curve.