• Member Since 20th Oct, 2018
  • offline last seen Yesterday

RainbowThunder


I will try to write good stories. I hope I can do it.

T
Source

After his mother's death, Thunderlane ponders how to tell his younger brother Rumble about this. And Rumble doesn't even know what death is. Will Rumble be able to understand the older brother? Will Thunderlane be able to find a common language with Rumble?

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 8 )

You should really take the 'in' out of the title. "Thunderlane, I need in you" sounds like a clop fic title.

9263127
Really? O God! Sure I will change.

Good start and so sad. I used that background too. Makes me wonder what happened to their father.

9263323
Well, about father ... I think he just didn't like his kids and his wife. He didn't care. But in principle, Thunderlane and Rumble are not too worried about it, because their mother was more expensive. Mom raised them and took care of them. And father ... wasn't with them, when Thunderlane and Rumble grew.

9263580
Makes sense. In that case I'd suggest he's mentioned in the first chapter, so people aren't confused about him

9263587
I just don't know how to describe it. I mentioned him a little at the beginning. What else do you think is missing?

9263596
Ah, sorry I overlooked the mentioning of their father, thus wondering why he wasn't mentioned.

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