Spike and Smolder go to the Dragon Lands to celebrate with the other dragons for the Festival of Dragon Lords. While there, Spike meets a young dragon with aspirations to be just like him. Flattered to be a role model, Spike agrees to hang out with him during the festival, unaware of who the young dragon is or the series of events that will follow that could result in the destruction of all of Equestria.
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This will be my November Writing Challenge for 2018. My word count goal is 50,000 words.
Having the story NOT start out in the Dragon Lands and having it focus on a small party with the Young Six was a stroke of genius. It's a really good warm up and a tease for what awaits us in the main story! Any Spike and Smolder moment is a big plus. I also like how Smolder is voicing her concerns in this chapter, about both her old friends and her new dress. You've given all the other characters a presence in this chapter and they add to the anticipation for what our two young dragons will find in the Dragon Lands. Please keep up this excellent quality and flawless characterization. The party scene was cute and fun with the Young Six interacting the way they do.
You've earned a Follow from me! I can't wait for the next chapter. I can't wait to see Smolder's dragon friends. I can't wait to see this mysterious young dragon.
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Glad you enjoyed the first chapter and I appreciate everything you said. Lots more to come soon.
Torch doesn't strike me as the sort of dragon who'd say "please" or "thank you." But, there it is, so...
You did the impossible! You made me feel sympathy for Garble! Incredible!
Uh oh. I think I see where this is going...
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Spike is only trying to be nice and help give his new friend an enjoyable day. Surely nothing bad can come from such good intentions.
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Oh, I know. It's not Spike that's the problem, obviously.
Spike is undeniable helping a terrorist unknowingly
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That's ridiculous. Garble is no threat here. Ember is still Dragonlord. Spike is just helping an angry pathetic grump reconnect with his little brother. That's a good thing. At the very least it will make Garble actually like Spike, or stop hating him, same difference.
Wonder what Thorax would think of this...
Kinda figured that duel between Garble and Spike wouldn't go the way Garble wanted, and that he'd get...carried away. Doesn't mean it was satisfying to see him face that, but...
Mysterious, evil, and presumably powerful guy that likes darkness, has green eyes, and has a grudge against Spike already? Gotta be Sombra.
Chrysalis and Garble. A VERY dangerous combination. luckily, I'm sure that it will be the brotherly love between Spark and Garble that will save the day and bring about Garble's reformation. That's right! Once again, Chrysalis will be ironically foiled by the power of love!
WHAAAAAAAAAAATTT!!!!!!!😨😨😨😭😭😡
Came across your story & have been enjoying it a lot, especially when it features my fave dragon pair! =D
Little worried about next chapter's title though, here's hoping Spike pulls through this!
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Glad you are enjoying it!
As for the next chapter, its title might be very ominous, but surely nothing bad will really happen to Spike. Right?
Oh heck no, no, no , no NO!
At least I can see how the *all-out attack* command will be dealt with, not sure what you have in mind for Spike at this point but I hope it's something awesome.
As for Crag, he can rot in Tartarus for all I care at this point!
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If Crag does somehow lose at this point, he’s built up tons of bad karma in this one chapter alone. As for Spike, guess we’ll have to wait and see.
*big applause* Holy Crap, that was intense & I loved every minute of it!
Really felt so good seeing Crag his just desserts at Torch's fist, very satisfying! Would have loved an epilogue of my fave dragon pair getting a heroes welcome at Ponyville too. Also glad that Garble got something of a second chance here, you made me feel sorry for him & that's no easy task.
I have to agree with Torch here as well.
Great story all around & just in time for the final season to start next week, till your next tale!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it and happy I got it done just in time before the start of season 9.
I definitely enjoyed Torch punching Crag into the ground. A very fitting way for someone who values power over all else to be defeated. Also, Crag did tell Ember, the last time they met that if Spike didn’t return Spark to him, he’d better dig the biggest hole he can and hide in it before he got his claws on him.
I’m glad to give Garble more depth to his character, something he’s been lacking in the show and not sure how much that can be done for him in this final season.
As for the welcome home party, I’ll just leave that for the readers to imagine.
*thinks back to the chapter where Torch bored everybody to sleep with tales of his past exploits*
Altogether, a nice little tale.
I'm amused to see that Spike's plea for leniency on Garble's behalf has come with some unexpected consequences for the little dragon. That's the way this process works in Equestria, Spike. If the villain of the week is remorseful, they can be reformed and spared imprisonment or death, but the one who's willing to take that gamble is personally responsible for keeping them in line until their sentence is up. Unless you have Princess Celestia's massive social standing, then you can pawn that responsibility onto somepony else like she did with Fluttershy and Discord.
Garble and Spike have your classic macho, bro jock and sensitive, thoughtful nerd dynamic, with an added dose of moody teen and precocious pre-teen, so it's interesting to consider what their relationship will be like now that Garble has started to soften and mature a bit. At the very least, Spike can always point to the events of these last few chapters when he needs to keep Garble's hotheadedness in check,
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Glad you enjoyed it. ^^
Yeah, it would be nice to see more of Torch and the lore behind the position of Dragon Lord. From the show, we only got to see him in Dragon Quest and as a cameo in Campfire Tales. I have my head cannon in which he became an honorary buffalo through battle/all night partying, long ago as a great achievement during his time in charge, which is why they respected Spike in Over a Barrel.
Wait. So of the sceptre only works at audible range, then how it summon Spike from all the way in Ponyville?
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While the Dragon Call to summon dragons to gather around it can be used at any range, any other command must be done verbally. At least that’s how it works in the story.
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Ah, okay.
One of my favorite fan fics by far! Top 10 maybe even top 5!
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I’m really glad you enjoyed it.
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Make a sequel. Make a sequel!
This story is so good!
Dragon Lord Critias. Where have I heard that name before?
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Yeah they're big and they breath fire and all, but it's one nation vs recently united nations. Plus, we have Discord as a contingency plan.
I hope Spike can do something awesome next chapter.
<stares in disbelief> …Excuse me for a moment.
(proceeds to grab a pillow, and plant my face deep into said pillow) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!
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He's gone! We've lost!
Anyways, now how could this tragedy continue on, and how will it end!? (dramatic pose)
That was all INCREDIBLE. And I almost got a heart attack from reading his death.
"My death was... greatly exaggerated." Thank goodness for loopholes.
Seeing (or reading) Torch crashing his fist onto Crag, obliterating him down into the ground, was satisfaction undaunted. Everyone agrees Ember is right to remain Dragon Lord. The war ended as soon as it started. Smolder's 2 friend groups finally meet. Hooray, Garble's gonna get a pardon for his crimes, by attending the School of Friendship.
Man, I can already imagine, Epilogue Future, the dragon-friends decide to pay Crag a little visit, and he sees them all grown up and successful-looking, while he's all alone and miserable.
Oh my Celestia, yas! Spike and Smolder is a nice ship indeed.
I didn't like this story very much. It was alright until Chysalis got involved who was not in the Dragonlands for any reason at all. The explanation to stop Discord from solving everything was not a plausible one either.