Old Times Sake

by thatonecoffeemachine

Promises Ever Kept

He felt lost.

Scared.

Empty.

Off.

Feelings he had promised himself to desert, feelings that he knew would bring him down if he kept on reaching for them. How long has he suppressed them, for his friends, for his new beginning, his life, himself. Only to be punched in the gut by rural thoughts.

Floating in now a mere void, he sighed as he realized. He was back to the beginning again. No....no town. No fountain. No clouds. No colorful streets. Nothing that even remotely resembles a town at all. Nothing. Not even the bakery. Just him, floating in vast emptiness. His home- well, used to be, was gone.

He felt like breaking at the point. To curl up and cry. To leave behind what he had received and the thoughts and feelings that he had felt and remembered while being a friend and resort back to his methods. They had always served to please him more than any living thing could, anyway. But....

He couldn't.

He felt like laughing, but his throat caught him and before he could even stop himself, he was crying more. Heh, his trsut, friends, what's next? His sanity?

He was never truly sane, he knew that and embraced it. But he never had felt true confusion and befuddledment in his entire life. Well, he didn't think it'll come biting him back again. Twilight.....heh. He truly believed himself to be above of what she had thought of him. But, guess he proved himself wrong, mauling her in front of her own friends. What was he thinking.....

However, he felt no remorse for her specifically, but more guilt towards her friends, who had to see that. See him maul their "friend". They never did anything bad to him- well except that one time they had gladly sent him to stone- but that was the past. They had never really intend to hurt hi at all, and they never did. Yet, he had repaid him with this. A relapse of judgement, possibly. Questions. Because of course Twilight wouldn't tell them the full story of what went on, and he would of course be painted as the baddie as.....usual.

But to be fair, even if she didn't say anything, it would be pretty easy for them to turn sides.

Now he floats alone, miserable, lonely, sobbing at his own misery. Never had he thought he'd end up like that. Never had he thought he would weep for the loss of friends he so despised having to deal with before. Never had he thought he would cry for his own fictional made world that could be recreated again with the mere snap of his talon.

But it wouldn't feel right. It's....not the same. Not the same process as before. Not the same care and attention it would've been given with only him. Without her help, it would never be the same again.....

Fluttershy was perfect in his eyes. So perfect that everything she did was harmonious to his eyes. He wasn't the kind to diss imperfection but.....whatever his friend likes, he should like to. He even managed to convince Fluttershy to help him build up the town. He knew her ideas would be as perfect as her. That's what she is, in his eyes. Perfection.

His ideas had always been over the top, therefore having her input could help him pinpoint exactly what the town needs instead of what he wants. After all, it was built to make him feel homey. Just like how he felt living in Ponyville. And in her cottage. How much more comfortable it felt and not exciting and rambunctious as his ideas were to be.

And trying to recreate the town again with his own talons would be too.....reminding. Reminding of what he had lost. The memories broken with the lost of what he had treasured in his life up till then. He......he couldn't make himself go through that, even if it means just living in a void. He couldn't possibly go back to Equestria, where would he go? What would he do?

He had disappointed her, he knew that all to well. And so were the others, he had definitely disappointed. Besides, what sort of sane pony would befriend such a monsterous traitor? A traitor that not only mauled their friend, but a damn princess? A figure of high authority? If he were to maul Celestia, he knew getting himself off scot-free wouldn't be easy. Hell, he could've even been killed.

Fluttershy.....boy, had he put her through alot. He never forgot the tie where he faced the sad expressions of his friends as they were all locked up, him being foolish to betray them so easily and fall into a trap he had even help to build up. Fluttershy's teary expression, her eyes.....it was all too clear in memory.

Yet she forgave him. This pegasus.......she was unbelievable. Possibly too naive for her own good. Yet.....he was glad she was a forgiver. Even though he betrayed her trust plenty of times, even if he was a known liar, she still trusted him enough to forgive him. And he never understood that.

She had always believed he had something good in him. Something worth noting, something worth defending. He had no worth, no good purpose in life, he was pure chaos in name and soul. Yet she had accepted him so easily. She never believed it when others warned that he might go feral one day, or turn his back against him when he had enough power and authority, or even when he had a smallest of chances. And there he was moments ago, mauling her dear friend to near death of blood lost and watching as the princess bled in pain. His claws were on her throat, deep in her skin, he knew he had no explanation for it.

They had accepted him after seeing how Fluttershy accepted him in so easily. It's pretty believable if it's the most shyest of the crowd lending out a hoof to someone like......him. It took him long enough to get accepted by them- not that he wanted them anyway, Fluttershy felt enough for him. But......more friends did make life more exciting. Much like his childhood years of how excited he felt making friends with Luna and Starswirl instead of just plain ole' Celestia.

All that effort was wasted, he supposed. He lost everything in the end.

To think that he cared for them.....and that was what cost him. His care. His pride. His anger towards the one who was using them, yet the one at fault accused their own victim. How easy he had left those sweet memories of them all being together.

He should stop crying. He squeezed his eyes shut as he didn't dare anymore tears fall. He was a grown man....h-he shouldn't......

It was dizzying to keep his emotions cramped down his own throat. And in the end, he gave in and sobbed. Freely, his tears flowed as more memories flooded in, taunting him any way they could.

---

"She.....she really did....."

Celestia clutched the letter towards her chest. It was sent by Twilight a few hours ago and only then did she read it. Oh how much she had regretted letting that much time pass easily. She paced to and fro in the throne room, worrying.

"....I...I need to talk to him. H-he....I need..." she couldn't even process what she was thinking. She was too worried. Concerned for the Lord. What had Twilight done to the Lord to be able to say she's "done it"? Is he alright? She hoped he was. She couldn't fathom holding herself together if she hears news of the Lord.....

No, no she can't think like that. She needed an answer, and she was going to get it.

With haste, she summoned a scroll and a quill. She sat herself in her throne and wrote away, her attention stuck solely onto the draft of paper she was writing on and the words she was producing. She even stated in the letter the urgency of his presence. Knowing him, if there was no benefit for him to come, then he wouldn't. But this time was no ordinary letter, it was no ordinary request. She was worried, and so help her God that she gets an answer or she'll be forced to look for him herself!

She bit her lip as she felt nervous of whether he'd reply or not. If he's gone, that'll shatter her into a million pieces instantly. If he was alright, she hoped that the reason he didn't answer was because he feared her. Whatever Twilight did could've certainly affected him that way. He rarely visited too, which was a change in her time as the old days were usually filled with whatever nonsense he could muster up. She knew that although they were back in speaking terms, he had never forgotten the things and decisions she had made that almost cost them their future. Well, her future. An offer of redemption was her way of asking for forgiveness, although it bothered him immensely. She did regret putting him in stone, but she had to convince herself that it was for their own good. Encasing him in stone like a caged bird.

She never wanted to hurt him. He was one of her good friends, still is hopefully. They've been childhood friends and for millenniums it had been that way. But all it took for them to switch paths was a misunderstanding, a fight, and justice served. She didn't mean for it to be that way. She knew now that he was a good person. He probably never intended to lash out the way he did either. He was just.....misunderstood. With no way to tell. He didn't know how to.

She felt her heart ache at the though of making him relive the period of suffering he had endured before. Whatever Twilight did, she knew it could never be right. With what state Twilight is in now, she could only hope for the best for Discord. He had put i too much effort and even if he wouldn't admit, his heart and soul into paying off his sentence with repentance. And he knew she was too. And just to have it taken away like that, she knew it could never be right.

She started to cry as her thoughts raced, and drops fell onto the parchment.

He doesn't deserve misery. Not now, not before, not ever. Not even for the good of Equestria. No one does.

Her quill suddenly trembled as her magic felt too weak with all the feelings hitting her. She didn't want to lose what they have created since the beginning. Their friendship was too important at this point, and even fragile. What if something happened to him? He had to be alright! Memories of childhood came to play in her mind, with how they laughed, played, and lived together. How they were there for each other through thick and thin, how he helped her with her upcoming title, how he had always trusted her judgments merely because she was his friend.

Her quill dropped unexpectingly as she cried. She had done things in the past that she wasn't proud of, and is trying to make up for it. But now as a new patch is fixed on, a new rip emerges. Her ex-student is walking in her own hoofsteps.

After awhile, she sat up straight, sniffling. She had to stay strong, she can't cry. This was for him. She told herself not to rely on self pity to make herself feel better. Repeating the thought in her head, she slowly tried to calm down as she began to write again. And this time, she focused.

She continued writing the letter. Do it for him, do it for him, do it for him..... She finished writing the letter after awhile, satisfied as she read it through once more. And all it needed left was her signature. ...do it for me, please.

She rolled the scroll up, and then wiped her eyes with one hoof. She focused as a flame swallowed the letter, sending it to the draconequus.

She knew it'll take time. It'll take him a while to answer. But he was allowed to take his time. All she needed was an answer.

She still felt shaken up however. The letter she received gave her a strong headache and a nauseous feeling due to being filled with sudden worry. To know that her dear ex-student had sent it, it made her chest heavy as she felt fatigue.

She never wanted to meet up with her again. She knew however, that it was her burden to bear. After all, she was her student. Used to be, anyway. She had put all her citizens in a tight position, helpless. She felt her head spin again as the castle suddenly felt stuffy with all these thoughts running through her mind. Without hesitating, she decided to get out for some fresh air or a stroll.

---

She decided to relax on the castle rooftop, looking at the sun in the distance as she prepared herself to lower it after half an hour left. Being on the rooftop, it also reminded her of her old childhood years. She remembered when Discord used to sneakily bring them to the rooftop as the two sisters were still too young to be able to fly with ease, and onto the rooftop was a far distance. Throwing up colored water balloons and watch them explode in the sky and pour down colorful rain was one of the best memories from those years.

Although she smiled at those memories, they couldn't help but make her chest heavier. She hasn't gotten a response yet. Although she had convinced herself to give him time, she was still in shock from the letter and just needed reassurance at that point.

"Sister?" said Luna as she tapped on her sister's shoulder. Celestia was surprised to hear her sister's voice suddenly, but she didn't mind her as the blue alicorn sat herself beside her, leaning against her sister. Actually, she had read the letter left in the throne room then went after Celestia. Despite what others may believe, Celestia was a sensitive mare. Her cool and brave facade was only to the public, but to her loved ones, she shows her emotions fully. "Sister, I tell you solemnly, Twilight will soon see the end to her madness. Whatever that alicorn has in store, it wouldn't last as long as our citizens and we are strong."

Luna only knew about Twilight's letter and nothing about the letter her sister had sent to Discord earlier. Therefore, her only context of this was Twilight probably telling Discord off for something. Celestia however knew much more. Being more closer with Discord, he would constantly tell her about the "flaws" in him that Twilight finds repulsive, in a sense. Although it might possibly not be the case for his absence and sudden incident to occur, she hoped that it wasn't more than that. Hopefully, Twilight isn't a nitpicker and had anything else more to hate about him.

Besides that, she also knew that Luna doesn't really hold the same close relationship to Discord as she did. She still thought of Discord as a traitor from long before. However, she still respected him and his boundaries. Their relationship was more of a brotherly sisterly hatred towards one another, and Luna didn't mind that at all.

Celestia, although knowing of the grudge Luna held against him still, she knew that the alicorn and him at least had one thing they could acknowledge about each other and take in. They were both in a tough situation before, and they both went through redemption. That was one thing they had in common, and that was one of the things that helped them to understand each other.

Luna noted the saddened expression her sister held, and decided to leave her be for awhile. "...I'll be in my room preparing for my shift. Don't stay up too long and have your dinner, it's beginning to go cold," said Luna, bidding her goodbye as she flew off to her room balcony instead.

Celestia sighed as it was the beginning for the sun to set, noon. And the reply hasn't came yet. She still worried.....

Maybe he's tired of the day. Maybe he's still in shock. Maybe he still needs time for himself, maybe he's hurt and is trying to get better beforehand, maybe.......

....maybe he's gone.

She felt as if she would cry again. And the thought made her breathe a shaky breathe. A Princess, a leader, a friend, is she doing something wrong.......

".....Discord....I'm sorry...." she fell onto her stomach as she laid. "I'm sorry I didn't stop her from becoming this way. I-I'm sorry if you're hurt. I didn't know....." she sniffled.

"...hello," said a voice suddenly. A familiar voice. Discord......She turned her head abruptly and faced the draconequus, who stood by the edges of the roof seemingly staring fdown at her. No mischievous grin, no smirk, no laugh, only an empty look of.....confusion. "...why are you crying?" he asked, his tone raspy, although he tried hard to conceal it.

"...Discord..." she manage to blurt out. She wiped her eyes as she slowly got up. She edged towards him slowly, but was taken aback as he backed up himself. "You-......do you think I'm going to hurt you?" Discord looked at her with the look of uneasiness and doubt, which hurt her to see. "I- please, I didn't call you here to do anything, I just- want to talk....."

He was still shaken from earlier, and seeing the princess calling for him was either two things. One, she wants to finish the job herself and two.......she wants to finish the job herself. Her hoof extended towards him. He blinked as she reached forward and brushed his face, and he shivered at the touch.

"..I'm sorry, Discord. I should've-"

"It's not your fault," he said. She.....maybe she wanted to help him?

"But I should've known! I know she was unstable but I didn't stop her until she got this far. I feared that one day something like this would happen, and it did! I just-" she choked on her tears "...didn't know when..........you were my best friend, and still is, you know that? You did everything for me. You did everything with me. You helped me to claim the throne. You showed me that there's more in life than just learning to be a princess. You..." she paused and shut her eyes tightly. "You were just being you. You weren't evil. You were misunderstood. I had already regretted putting you in stone. I should've just tried talking you out of it, instead I isolated you because I didn't know what to do. And to think of you going back into that state even though you tried your best to get to this position and make amends....it doesn't feel right. I don't feel right! I just-"

Discord said nothing at first and just brought her in for a hug. He was crying as well, although he hoped she wouldn't notice. "It's.....it's okay. You had no choice, anyway. I deserved imprisonment those years ago......don't blame yourself, please, I feel hopeless enough."

There, the princess and draconequus wept together. In each other's embrace. And as the sun went down, Discord fell into his own mind. He had forgotten about her. And he was his first friend. He felt slightly guilty for that, but it didn't matter then as he savoured the momentn they had then.

"....hey," he said as he broke the embrace. Celestia looked up at him, her face covered in tears. Discord couldn't help but smile at that. ".....so uh, drama and all that, uhm-you don't mind if I stay here right?"

Celestia's ears perked at the sudden question as she sniffled.

"Twilight.....kinda destroyed my pocket world and now it's just a void and a vast land of space ain't that fun to sleep in. Heh, friendship kinda stings....ouch."

Celestia stopped a gasp that escaped her lips, instead just gave a small chuckle. "....stay as long as you like, Discord."

"For old times sake eh?" he joked.

They sat alone. Together. And the sun setted down like normal

When they were kids, they had promised to be friends till the end of time. And the promised stayed even as adults. He still had her. And that was enough for him.

Author's Note:

aight imma head out now bai

Comments

[mugged_pooch]

This was truly tugging at my heartstrings the entire time. Keep up the truly amazing work!

[thatonecoffeemachine]

9255403
Thank you, these kinds of comments truly make my day.

[TheDiscordLover1200]

Now I wanna read the story that came before this.... Because this is a work of ART

[Nerfyy]

wow . . . just wow

At first when i read 'Losing Sight' i wasnt that into it cause it felt like there was an ending and more troughout missing

and now i see this and courious as i am, reading it of course

and holly Chaos this is heartwarming and breaking all the same
just beautiful!
I REALLY loved where this was going and would DIE to see more of how Discord and Celestia deal with things after this

youre really good at writing emotional interactions! More pls <3

that said i also wanted to ask where i can find the original to this coverart (its fantastic <3)

greetings from Germany
Chris aka. Nerfy

[thatonecoffeemachine]

9260273
Hi, Chris! Thanks for your comment, really made my day. I agree, I wasn't really feeling it when I wrote 'Losing Sight', but glad to know that you liked this one!

Also, I found the image on pinterest. I tried looking for the artist's name or maybe deviantart but can't find it. But I have the link to the pinterest page: https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.pinterest.com.au/pin/600878775253296093/&ved=2ahUKEwj6zue5vq3eAhXB6Y8KHeprC2AQFjABegQIARAB&usg=AOvVaw1nlEjJTzDVAP4atVjYYJ-j

I'll tell you when I find the artist's actual page.

[Pete100]

Ok, I’m a little confused.

[PaulAsaran]

You can has review!