• Member Since 8th Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

Vicron


Hello My real name is Noah, Vicron is the name of my brother's favorite Bionicle M.O.C that I built.

T

With Teridax's Plan presumably failed and one of their member fallen, the Makuta fear rescue may never arrive. So when presented with a chance to escape their fate they take it. Now they find themselves in a new land, with new rulers and no knowledge of them.

Faced with the six children of Shadow, the Royal Sisters find themselves with a decision to make, and, puzzled by incomplete tales of a world locked in an eternal war between Light and Dark, not much time to make it.

What would any self respecting Makuta do, but push the advantage?

Chapters (11)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 57 )

This shows promise, tracking.

“With that out of the way, would the three of you care for some tea?” Celestia offered, keeping her face and voice a mask of simple friendliness, “the saying is business before pleasure, but I find all parties are more agreeable if their places are switched.” Antroz didn’t react, which in and of itself was enough to tell her he was suspicious of her, but Mutran and Gorast displayed a short burst of confusion, their eyes darting towards Antroz.

“I see no reason why not,” he said carefully after a few moments, his own mask of a smile not shifting. “I apologize, the words escaped me, the language is still new to me.” Celestia hummed her understanding and gestured for one of the guards to go fetch them a pot and some cups.

Due to their current state all Makuta no longer require rest, food or drink.

9062937
No, but Celestia doesn't know that, and there's no real reason for them to shove aside a gesture of goodwill by revealing tactically important information to her.

I was actually quite careful to make sure they revealed as little of what they were capable of as possible while still making it look like they're giving away a lot.

Great start so far cant wait for more

Ah you've just gotta love the Makuta for one simple fact... They make lawyers look honest.

9072900
Makuta "I never lied, per se" Antroz.

Good chapter,i feel you realy captured the character of all that were present

Comment posted by Edguy0009 deleted Aug 5th, 2018

Why do I feel like Vamprah is going to stay in Equestria?

All of my love for a lovingly crafted and correctly spelled and (mostly) punctuated piece of Bionicle fanfiction, thank you.

Antroz was lying about their history right? I don't remember some of that history. Then again it has been awhile since I last read Bionicle, but a check of the wiki does not mention any of Antroz's exposition. What's going on?

I'm gonna guess that the meeting is what went through six revisions.

9101161
I'm filling in a lot of the sizeable gaps in the Bionicle timeline with some headcanon of my own, but the degree to which he's being truthful is up in the air. This information will be important later.

Also you are correct, Twilight's section is the one that gave me trouble.

Fascinating all around, I'll never complain about long chapters. I thought this to be nicely sized, personally, long enough to really enjoy. You're doing a nice job with the makuta, and even better, have kept well away from the idiot ball shenanigans that all too often crop up in stories like this.

Storms, I've not thought about Bionicle in years, this story is bringing back all of the old nostalgia. Keep it up!

9106421
Yeeeeesssssss the nostalgia is good for old boooooness.

I wouldn't worry about chapter length, but the fact that you are thinking about how much you can get done in so many words and whether or not to tarry with them does show a healthy amount of thought in your writing. Keep up the good work.

“Should have figured,” Mutran huffed, “I was looking forwards to him slamming face first against the top of it or something.” Twilight threw him an incredulous look, “he would have been fine,” he assured her, holding up his hands in surrender, “it just would have been funny.” Twilight rolled her eyes, she figured that was it. She glanced over at Chirox to see if he’d been in on that, but he was still stonefaced, almost bored.

He’s right that WOULD HAVE been funny no wait... it IS FUNNY. *starts laughing*

I’m going to call it Vamprah is going to stay behind.

9118393
i should certainly hope so, it would really be better if the all stayed since unless this disrupts the events of bioncle canon then they would be going back only to be slaughtered by a recently freed and quite irate miserex. theres a reason the makuta are functionally extinct by the end of the series

9118492 9118393
Let's just say Vamprah's the one with the most reason to go back.

If the Makuta were voiced, what would they sound like?

9118540
i'm not suure about the rest, but teridax does have a speaking role in official video media

9118540
Gorast would be pretty hoarse, like someone who's spent most of their life screaming at the top of their lungs.
Chirox has a perpetual sneer, think pompous high class dude without an accent.
Antroz would be kinda gravelly, not quite gargling rocks, but think Chris Hemsworth halfway to a metal growl.
Krika kinda murmurs, like he's trying not to be too noticed.
And Mutran's got the full Mad Scientist Boom going.

I just can't think of a very prosey way of saying those things, so I figured it'd be better to just leave it up to the audience's imagination to fit voices to their personalities rather than do a poor job of filling in the blanks.

9118520
But he seems to have grown on the Sisters (mainly Luna), not mention he’d come in handy in some situations.
9072900
See below
9073473
Radar has picked up a helicopter going soi soi soi.

The tension is getting so thick that you can cut it with a knife. Great work.

Oh storms. Piraka? Of all possible things it just had to be piraka.

9132333
A very specific Piraka, with a very specific person's mask fused to the back of their head.

I actually forgot about gavla's rare situation among shadow matoran, while i;m unsure if anything like this is official, it makes sense with his unusually bestial shape and her atypically strong loyalty, love to see more of this and hopefully she gets to come over since she hardly has a place she belongs at this point.

9132808
I will remember it until the day I die. They will have to pry those two being good for each other from my cold, dead hands.

9132391
Oh yes the one that has more than a few screws loose and enjoys killing a little too much.

9132819
and even then good luck! For I will have glued it to my cold dead hands!

9132391
" who's my favorite engine of destruction you are yes you are!"

Luna supposed how comfortable she was becoming with Vamprah’s presence should have been some cause for alarm, but she could not deny he had been on his best behavior after his initial assault upon Steady Hoof. His moods seemed almost to reflect her own in a way, though it was subtle enough that she didn’t think any of the guards or Celestia had begun to notice yet his ire rose and fell in concert with her own, and the more comfortable she was at any given moment the more like an overgrown cat he behaved. He enjoyed his presence acknowledged, but would turn up his nose if it was directly influenced in manner beyond simple words when she was relaxed.

For some reason I have this image of Vamprah having shapeshifted into a cat. I’m not the only one with this image in their head am I?

Now just how did Vezon get into this universe?

9157252
He got an Olmak fused to the back of his head by an incident involving Energized Protodermis. A very specific Olmak belonging to someone who was building an army.

Things are starting to get VERY interesting.
Also for the final two sentences: https://youtu.be/i066Jm5R1tQ

9118556
What about the Piraka?
9118554
Really? Can I get a link?

9173402
I do so believe that nickle is talking about the first two movies.

As Luna hummed in consideration Twilight saw the other Makuta stepping off the train. Only Gorast showed any reaction to the cold, hesitating and shivering for a moment before her eyes began to swirl with green and yellow. Antroz and Mutran continued without acknowledging it, Antroz’ head high, wings hanging loose and stride sure with Mutran slouched beside him, hands on his hips and wings folded in close.

Rahkshi/Kraata of Ice Resistance are Red and Yellow, and it's TAKANUVA

9202934
I'm going by Kraata colours, also the Makuta are being intentionally disrespectful by refusing to use his Toa name.

9203029
Oh I see on the Takua thing,*checks Rahkshi and Kraata colors* oh you were right the colors of the Kraata and the Rahkshi are different which doesn't make sense IMHO.

9203063
The Kraata thing is weird, but it's a thing that I made sure to take into account specifically to avoid people trying to get an "Aha! Gotcha!" off of me like you just tried to.

9203071
It's honestly impressive how much you've taken what the lore gives you and expanded upon it.

9204157
Thank you very much! I've always had a bit of a love/hate relationship with the way the worldbuilding in Bionicle worked. It showed off how much stuff was in the world without hardly ever showing how it all related to each other; the end result being that it gives you a whole lot to work with and keep track of but not a lot of structure to work within. So over the years I've basically gone Conspiracy Postboard with it trying to tie everything together, which leads to the Aggressive Expansion you see here.

I'm pretty proud of it, to be honest.

9204165
Do you actually have a conspiracy post board? Cause if you do that's pretty sweet

9204350
Hehe, no, sorry, it's all mental. :twilightsheepish:

9204493
Don't worry we're ALL mental here.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!