Back then it seemed like a good idea, get me some peace and quiet and stay unbothered by the stallions (and mares) that want a piece of me.
I should really have added an expiration date on that stupid part of parchment, or at least made sure i overturned it at some point.
Now here I sit, the old scroll self summoning into my face and the record keepers agreeing, that no amount of overturning will save me from having to follow.
Welp, no helping it, might as well try to make this mess work.
Chapters (1)
Ughhhh... It isn't bad, but you need proofreader so badly.
Lack of capitalised "I", some capitalisated words without sense. And probably more, and this is from guy who english is for sure not strong forte.
Even title have bug
Interesting. Followed.
I look forward to the scene of Luna laughing her plot off. Hopefully. I mean... Only if you want to.
Pretty funny.
Oh man
The writing is a bit clunky
But I love the idea
This is gonna be good.
*sees chrysalis tag* huh, why is that
*amazonian law* oh no...
Living clubs are best weapons. Useful, and demoralize your enemies.
Great concept, good execution, but no offense, you need a pre-reader to help you eliminate the clunky grammar.
Oh, I love these kinds of stories. The stories with situations that come so left field that they are deserving of my "Where did...?" bookshelf. Tracked and I look forward to more, good sir!
So I gave this some thought over the last, what- day? and all I can think about is how Chrysalis would react to the news. She'd obviously be excited that she has an reason, and a legit way, to get back to equestria and Canterlot specifically. However, I always imagine changelings to have issues with intimacy in their true forms. While she may have no issue flirting while wearing the form of another, I can see Chryssie going full-blown panic mode if Tia kisses her in public or even in private with no disguise.
In other words, the changeling would enjoy it for about as long as it takes her to realize just what her 'marriage' will mean. She'd harass Tia for a bit, but then it's going to be turned around, as Tia tries to drive her off with affection
Nice start. I liked the living club post. Wanna read more.
You should fix the capitalisations, though.
Cya
Raziel-chan
Maybe but it is hilarious
Could have been good but there's no indication that chrysalis is even aware of it and the interplay between the two would have been the funniest part.