I may not be a great writer,
Princess Celestia has decided to step down from the throne for a day and mingle with the common folk.
Princess Luna has also decided to step down from the throne for a day and mingle with the common folk.
Princesses Celestia and Luna neglected to inform each other of this decision.
Page generated in 0.112 seconds
Total duration
870 users online
1,701,854 hits today, 2,707,512 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This has amazing potential, I will say that. Your writing style is interesting and fresh, while the story makes more sense than many tics on the site.
.....Well this sounds foreboding as hell.
6199920
Where the heck did you get that notion from? +1 on the idea and all, but the prose is pretty bog-standard (and very tell-y).
Wow.
I can already see the train wreck in motion.
I hope Twilight is in a good mood, at least. Things will get fucked up in short order, but hopefully at least anonymously looking in on Twilight will work. Is Twilight a princess yet? It sounds like this is happening pretty early on, so I think she's at least still in the library.
My guess is that Pinkie Pie will be the one to notice that she's actually Celestia--unless she keeps the mannerisms, I doubt Twilight would recognize her. A mane that's a single color and no longer moving with magic, a pegasus, normal pony proportions, a cutie mark several steps removed from Celestia's own, no regalia... even her face wouldn't look the same with her reduced to the shape of other ponies. Twilight lacks that sort of intuition.
But what happens to the links to the celestial bodies now? Will the sun hunt down Luna and attach to her (and the same with moon/Celestia)? What would that do to their disguises? Will they just attach to random ponies, or perhaps whatever pony is most suited to them (ahaha... Celestia arrives at Ponyville to find Twilight flattened to the floor from the sun and moon's attentions)?
This going to end in hilarity...
>just as she hoped she could dismiss the court before she started to drool, snore, or decompose, whichever came first.
Very nice line!
Nitpick about the photo: it seems unreasonable that they had photos a thousand years previously, yet are still vaguely mid-20th-century tech in the show.
This is a nice set-up, but I think it could be shorter.
7258836 Thanks! I... sort of agree about the photo, but it's hard to really compare Equestrian technology to real-life technology when magic is such an integral part of life there. I figured photography and the like would be reasonable, if incredibly expensive (which royalty would have no issues with).
And eh, yeah, I have a hell of a time trying to get in that sweet spot between bare-bones and too wordy, but I'm generally happier with my writing when it's more on the wordy side.