• Member Since 8th Feb, 2015
  • offline last seen Jul 20th, 2016

RTyrant


This is a shadow account for obvious reasons. Enjoy!

Comments ( 19 )

Is this title a reference to Hotel Transylvania?

I did remember! Now I get to read the full finished product :pinkiehappy:

5607033 Eep! You know my true identity. :trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:
Hi Tchernobog! I hope you enjoy it. I know there's still a few issues here and there that snuck through all the editing, but it's about as polished as I can get it without wanting to change things all around again. :twilightblush:

Those are some really fresh ideas, people don't pay enough attention to wings. Loved it.

5607866 Thanks, I'm glad you liked it. Also, I agree. More attention should be paid to wings. :twilightsmile:

Well, this was an interesting story. I'm not normally a fan of AppleDash, but this was pretty good. Good pacing, interesting idea, pretty good all around. Good work :pinkiehappy:

5610632 Thanks! I'm glad you liked it, especially when it's a pairing you aren't fond of. That can be really hard to get past. I see you're a writer with quite a bit of experience. Any ideas or critiques to throw at me by any chance?

5613623 Uhm, I actually don't have too much to critic. The story has a nice flow, very smooth, with the interactions between Dash and Aj very normal and in character. The time change may need a more prominent announcement (perhaps putting the 'Two years later' in the center, text size a little larger?) but otherwise it was still very easy to understand.

Though I was surprise at Fluttershy's daring to peek at their talk. This however was made up when she got back to her house and tried to run away from the others.

Otherwise, this was really well written. I'm not particularly good at grammar, so I can't suggest much there. Everyone was in character and very good. Oh! Though I just remembered an issue. You have Apple Bloom say she was going to Sweetie Belle's sister's place to get Aj's hat back. At that time in the show though, she doesn't know Sweetie Belle. It would have been better if you just said 'Rarity' or described Rarity (prissy-ness or really obsessed with fashion). Other than that, very well done. :pinkiehappy:

5614145 Oh wow, I never realized. You're right, they would have been too young to go to school together. I wonder if anyone else will catch that. XD

Thanks for the input! I'm really critical of my own work, so it's really nice to hear others viewpoints. I will fix it.

5614465 No worries, I understand what you mean. I like to hear general comments of 'this is great' or 'nice chapter' but some critic is just heavenly. Other readers may just have gotten lost so well in the story that they didn't notice. :raritywink: :twilightsmile:

How does this not have more upvotes?
Characters were great, pace was great, premise and concept was great. This story seriously had a delicious welter of emotions going on, you had me going from laughing my ass off, to blushing anticipation of the intimate moments, to heart wrenching pleas that everything would turn out fine, to just about in happy tears and 'd'awwwing'.
I honestly haven't read a better intimate Appledash romance since 'Stuck', your fic needs more promotion!

AWESOME! This has gotta be my second or third favorite AppleDash story ever! :pinkiehappy: I would say first or second, but I know for a fact that 'Treating Her Right' is my favorite AppleDash story :derpytongue2: great job, glad I found this story


5656770 heh, I remember 'Stuck', and I agree, this story needs more up votes, it deserves all the attentions!

5656770 5668493

Wow! Having it compared to Stuck and Treating her right! That's amazin'! Thanks! :pinkiegasp:

It was a challenge and a lot of fun to write. Also, I don't know why it didn't get more attention. Probably because I didn't post it during peak hours, or because I used a shadow account. I wasn't looking for a lot of attention, it just seemed kinda sad to leave it hidden in google docs forever so I posted it. I'm just happy others enjoyed it. :pinkiehappy:

I was actually pondering writing a SFW version and posting it to my main account some day, but I'm really busy at the moment with my two main stories. :applejackunsure:

I love this story it is so sweet. I read it once and just finished reading it again to my friend.

I Fucking love this story so much.
It's sweet, in character, adventurous, naughty... And full of love.

One of the best Appledash!

Note to self,
Story: best appledash proposal, best secret wedding, best pegasi wedding concept, Fluttershy accidental witness
10/10 would recommend

Dash shrugged. “I’ll take my chances, besides you don’t seem like the type of pony to go around breaking hearts.” She nibbled and nipped at Applejack’s neck playfully. “I mean come on, you haven’t raped me yet, and I can’t throw myself at you any harder.”

Sounds like it’d be consensual to me. I’d change that word to “jumped” or something.

By the way, I’m really enjoying this story! It’s quite well written and engaging. The time jumps make for some interesting revelations.

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