• Published 22nd Nov 2011
  • 6,181 Views, 95 Comments

To Feel the Music - Secret Pony



Vinyl is down on her luck, but a date with destiny shows her how insane life really is.

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Return of the Narrator!

Octavia cautiously walked out of Lyra’s house looking like the Band-Aid mummy. Not seeing any sign of her target, she began walking down the street trying to look as casual as possible. Well, as casual as one can look when a famous gray mare walks through town wearing a badly torn white cloak and having the majority of her visible body covered in bright neon pink bandages. Despite this glaring attention draw, the ninja wannabe continued to trot cheerfully down the street, hopefully buying herself some time whilst she formulated herself a plan.

‘Hmm, well I’m definitely in Ponyville, that much is certain,’ she thought to herself as she walked into the town square. Had she been paying attention, she would have noticed a distinct lack of the town residents in the merry square. ‘Now I need to figure out when I am. Let’s see, Lyra was defiantly still completely a pony so I must be before Ponyville got infected...’

“Well well well, Octavia. Judging by your attire you must have been in a fight recently.” The narrator cooed, looking down at her from his perch atop Princess Celestia’s fountain statue. Octavia quickly drew her daggers and jumped headlong at the omnipotent silhouette of a man.

The narrator calmly opened his book and read, “ 'But tripped on a rock and fell into the fountain.', Now now, Octy. We can’t have you attacking me before we finish our lines. After all, it’s in the script. And the fans need to hear the big reveals from the right ponies.” He gave her a devious grin to which Octavia only sneered at.

“Fine then, but I don’t know what’s scarier. The fact that you can smile and I can see it, or that you ruined everything because you forgot your lunch!” Octavia yelled back at the shadowrific being. “And furthermore...”

" 'Octavia started but bit her tongue in her rage and let out a roar of pain.' " The Narrator read. “Tsk, tsk, tsk. No big spoilers yet, my dearest. That comes in the next scene, until then you'll have to just make do with small hints and unnecessary violence. 'The pain finally began to subside once the narrator and his devilishly good looks finished warning her about spoiling the story.' "

Octavia spat out some blood before shooting the narrator another look. “Anger!” She growled and stabbed the concrete with her dagger, thus breaking it. “Look, I do not need this right now. I just wasted a whole lot of band aids,” She looked at the floating mass of pink currently clogging up the fountain’s filter. “My lover is about to go on stage all alone,” She pointed her her hoof in the general direction of Canterlot. “And worst of all, I just broke my antique dagger!” She threw the broken stub at the featureless idiot.

The Narrator dodged the dagger and closed his book, he knew this scene by heart. “Oh boo hoo! Because of you I didn’t get to eat my lunch!” He pouted, dramatically draping himself down Celestia’s side, waiting for Octavia to continue.

Octavia shook her head and facehoofed. “Then how come you’re chasing me around the story and not eating it?”

The narrator rolled over on the statue, facing away from Octavia. “Oh do you even care?”

“No, not really.” She admitted, finally getting up and out of the water.

The narrator chuckled and laid back on the statue, spinning the script above his finger like a basketball before replying. “Well whatever, I’m staying here whether you like it or not!”

Octavia's face became hidden under her hood as she gave a grim chuckle. “Well if that’s the case,” She held up her second dagger. “Then die!” She screamed, as she lunged at the laughing idiot.

The aforementioned idiot simply laughed harder and grabbed the mare’s arm. “Spin Cycle!”

***

Vinyl smiled to herself as she skipped into her apartment. She was quite pleased that she had indeed remembered to lock her front door in her heavily intoxicated state a few nights ago. She was definitely going to have to reward herself with something later, probably something chocolaty. Vinyl’s grin grew much larger at that thought. She loved chocolate.

Octavia, on the other hand, was much worse for wear. As the usually prim and proper earth pony staggered into the doorway of the DJ’s abode, one could not help but notice that her appearance was something reminiscent to that of a low grade adult film star, complete with lipstick kisses covering a vast majority of her flank. With a final grunt, she pulled herself past the doorway, kicking off the last of the groupies that had yet to detach themselves from her leg and acquainted her face with Vinyl’s floor for what could only be considered as the beginning of a long lasting, and almost heartfelt relationship.

The floor, who had been minding its own business up until moments ago, was caught completely off guard by the classical musician’s accidental advances and attempted to blush madly, only to realize that it had no face on which to portray its emotions and quickly fell into a deep depression. Had Octavia realized that she had caused any of this emotional duress upon the all-important surface which held her above the ground, she would have immediately apologized before offering to go on a date with it, in hopes of easing its suffering. However, seeing that she was unaware of all this, the floor proceeded to seek companionship from the ceiling, who immediately turned it down in hopes of getting a date with the ceiling fan. Oddly enough, upon further investigation, the ceiling fan turned out to not be sentient at all.

A few moments later, Vinyl walked back into the room across the now silently sobbing floor, absent mindedly humming a strange tune and carrying a bowl and spoon in her magic.

“Hey Octy…uh…you okay?” She asked, lightly nudging crumpled shape with her front hoof. At first Vinyl had assumed that her gray companion had passed out. Having that many groupies attack anypony in the sewer like that was bound to be a traumatic and exhausting experience, but Vinyl was soon corrected as an annoyed grumble was heard coming from Octavia’s form.

“Oh good, you’re alive. I just wanted to know what you want for breakfast and then you can go back to making out with the carpeting, mmkay?”

As soon as Vinyl’s words had sunk in, Octavia’s initial reaction was to shoot up and give her a cold stare. “I was doing no such thing!” She stated matter-of-factly.

The DJ grinned. “Oh yes you were, I saw tongue and everything.” Octavia’s face turned bright red as Vinyl’s drapes suddenly became quite interesting.

After a moment, Octavia spoke up. “H-how would that even work?” She had a confused look on her face. Vinyl simply shrugged.

“Dunno, but you somehow made it work, anywho, what do ya want for breakfast? I got cold cereal, cold cereal, whatever’s leftover from last Tuesday’s Chinese takeout, aaaaaand..." she paused for dramatic effect. "...cold cereal.”

“Ugh…I’ll take some cereal please.” Octavia mumbled defeatedly, wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“Filly Flakes it is!” Vinyl yelled, loud enough to wake the neighbors, while walking into the kitchen. Octavia simply shook her head and sat down on the couch.

The apartment was quaint, small, and much neater than Octavia remembered, although it certainly wasn’t perfect, not by a long shot. The orange carpeting looked to be in need of some serious hoovering, as did the orange and brown plaid couch that she was currently sitting on. The old coffee table, which was completely different from the one she remembered, had hoofmarks and scratches all over it, most likely from Vinyl's habit of placing her hind legs in the table when she ate.

Octavia sighed, a few minutes in here was actually bearable compared to the mess she had found when they moved in together in the future. She smiled to herself when she saw Vinyl's equipment. She had known that Vinyl was a DJ from the mission briefing she had received a few days prior, as well as 'past' experiences, but she hadn’t expected Vinyl to be that high-tech. Octavia chuckled. ‘Just like old times, or future times, or...Ah! This is so confusing!’ she thought, before a loud crash was heard from the kitchen.

Without thinking, Octavia leapt to her hooves and galloped to the kitchen.

“Vinyl dear, are you alright?” She instinctively yelled out, before realizing what she had said.

“Uh…yeah I’m alright…. Wait, what did you just say?” Vinyl stopped digging herself out of the pile of wood and canned food and looked right at the gray mare.

“I asked if you required any assistance, Miss Scratch.” Octavia replied in her usual stiff manner, hoping Vinyl hadn’t caught what she had actually said. When Vinyl gave her a look that read ‘do you think I am deaf?’ Octavia gave a sheepish grin while attempting to keep her perspiration rate under control.

“Uhh, yeah. Whatever. Um, can you come over here and give me a hand in digging myself out?” The white pony asked skeptically. Vinyl might have been a bit laid back, but that definitely didn’t mean she was stupid. She heard every word Octavia had said.

"O-Of course, Miss Scratch." Octavia lept to the DJ's side and began pulling cans out of the way. She had a feeling this was just the beginning of a long day...

Comments ( 58 )

Just to let everyone know, I do reply to every comment, I just like to reply through Private Messages :twilightsheepish:

This was brilliant on so many accounts. The internal monologue of the floor, the random interludes of narrator vs Octavia, and now apparently a twist considering the mention of a mission briefing? To say I'm intrigued doesn't really cover it.

39848
You people that comment make my day :pinkiesmile:

That poor floor. Nopony ever acknowledges its existence.

Can't imagine what its therapy bill must look like.

Excellent story. Very nice writing, and an almost Hitchhiker's Guide esque spree of tangents (while not detracting from the story at all).

Brilliant to read, can't wait for the next chapter!

Wooohooo! New chapter! :pinkiehappy:

I am intrigued to see what comes of Octavias apparent slip up, and just what past experience she has ever had with Vinyl ^^

And how can Vinyl not remember, does it involve some sort of Men in Black type technology? So many questions to, hopefully, be answered in the future :twilightsheepish:

I look forward to all of it good sir!

WOW. ok this is a twist, mission briefing? past experiences? Vinyl dear? What the Hell is going on? I am lost amd confused.?

Guesses.

Vinyl lost her memory. ?:derpyderp2:
Octavia cheating and her lover and had her mind erased?. :twilightsmile:
Octavia is a secret agent for the Roley Cort, had a fling with the J and fell in love, so after drugging her to clean her memory, Octavia is there to win her love?:moustache:
You sir as a writer need to lay off the drugs.:pinkiesick:
Vinyl is form Mars.:coolphoto:
Octavia is so good at sex she gives other ponies brain damage:pinkiecrazy:
and last one is Octavia is Twilight's real mother. :facehoof:


:twilightblush::rainbowkiss:

40019
Its always funnier to see Fredric get beaten

SO MUCH EPIC WIN!!!! You go good by the floor sir. But really was awasome, beautifuly written wat else can I say expect :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:. You = Win.

So far this story has shown me:
A fourth wall aware Octavia,
a complete jackass of a narrator,
and a full paragraph about the floor.
This is one of the biggest mind screws of a story I've ever read, and I love it.

Do I detect a bit of a Douglas Adams kinda thing going on? I'm Hearing the Narrator with a bit of Discord and the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

And just like that,the floor's hopes and dreams were crushed.Twice.:pinkiesad2:

... What is it with this fandom and their inanimate objects? Sheesh...

Can't wait for chapter 7!!!!:pinkiehappy:

42321
haha Its almost done!

Dude thank the Godz :D

Future memories? Ponyville infection? Jeezus I thought through the looking glass was a mind fuck. Ponyception. Excellent writing btw, Lewis Carol and Christopher Nolan would be proud

45599
Well exellent writing apparently means 3 stars in Equestria Daily >.>

But yeah, 'Time Travel is fun!' has been my motto lately, but don't worry its just a side plot and doesn't change the main story too much.

42925
Actually, I changed my mind from before, I'm pushing the release date back a few days because I just started thinking of ideas again.

#21 · Dec 3rd, 2011 · · ·

When I finished reading this chapter: :pinkiesmile:
When I saw that an ad for flooring had been automatically placed on the page: :pinkiehappy:

48811
:rainbowlaugh: hahahaha That sir, is what we call Win.

Please good Sir. make moar!! :fluttershysad:

71671
She does, don't you worry :pinkiehappy:

Ar:as//:?$28wbk duuuuuudddeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I love your vast imagination with this story, it shows a well rounded personality with both stories

76978
Just wait for the third sub-story. It is going to be the most random, crazy, fun and flat out strangest thing I have ever written. Currently plans include: Earth-bending, Batmare, Colgate: the magical time traveling dentist, Mad science experiments, robotic augmentation, a musical number, and a complete breakdown of the fourth wall. Do you think you can handle it? :rainbowlaugh: But remember, don't let that distract you from the up coming events with Vinyl and Octavia, they will prove to be most strange.

65744
Don't worry, more is coming. I just had a roadblock I needed to overcome before I could continue.

Posted 2 hours, 45 minutes ago:
Don't worry, more is coming. I just had a roadblock I needed to overcome before I could continue.

That's a YAY from me :D
I just wanted to ask for an update XD

79943
Lol, that still means I'm not going to have an update ready for a week or so :rainbowlaugh: I'm just gettin back into the writing swing. Its gunna take me a few days to get my mood right, and then about a day to write the chapter and maybe a day or two more to edit it. :scootangel: But don't worry, I am gunna update soon. Hopefully before the new year ^^

I'm looking forward to it, as long as it keeps up the quality ;)

80065
That depends entirely on how much time I have to get my head back on straight >.>

As long as it's possible, to respond to each comment.... I think there's pretty much time for you :derpyderp2: :derpyderp2:

80196
I guess your right ^^ :rainbowlaugh:

85612
Allegrezza XD
I have cameos to so many VinylTavi fics, kind of a homage to them. :pinkiehappy:

24604

I know right. TaviScratch OTP!

85655
Indeed *laughs* I think that almost everyone here agrees with that statement.

Haha, I finally located your account on here!
translation: "oh, hey look, it's Kakashi, how did I not find him sooner?"

Now I wait for Deviantart and FIMFiction updates XD

114425
P.S. I found you from finally reading the Season 2 ending of The Back Room XD

114431
Haha, Nice XD And don't worry, its coming soon. Been taking some time to organize myself and such.

The whole paragraph about the floor was hilarous! This fic is confusing and hard to follow at times, but that's what makes it unique and fun. It doesn't take itself very seriously.

115670
I'm sorry about the confusion, I have actually been spending the past month fixing the storyline so that it makes more sense. Hopefully later on all of this will make sense...(whats sad is that everything makes sense once I explain the plot DX)

The only way to win is to make the narrator say his name backwards and send him back to the 4th dimension where he belongs

I think next meetup we take the little blind bags and we'll act out your whole story with them for the lulz...

132968
*takes off glasses* Mother of Faust...

I actually quite like this good job sir:ajsmug:
...but about 30% of the time all i can think is "What fuq did I just read":derpyderp2:

711168

Heh, thanks. And that Confusion, that was kind of intentional. I'm trying to fix it...it's just....supremely difficult without totally messing up the story. :applejackunsure:

1. this paragraph is awesomely Douglas Adams-esque

The floor, who had been minding its own business up until moments ago, was caught completely off guard by the classical musician’s accidental advances and attempted to blush madly, only to realize that it had no face on which to portray its emotions and quickly fell into a deep depression. Had Octavia realized that she had caused any of this emotional duress upon the all-important surface which held her above the ground, she would have immediately apologized before offering to go on a date with it, in hopes of easing its suffering. However, seeing that she was unaware of all this, the floor proceeded to seek companionship from the ceiling, who immediately turned it down in hopes of getting a date with the ceiling fan. Oddly enough, upon further investigation, the ceiling fan turned out to not be sentient at all.

2. WAHT IS GOING ON!?

2022279
Honestly, I have no idea myself. I have some notes laying around here and a few drafts of rewrite but that makes even less sense than the original, although it is significantly more Douglas Adams-esque than the original.

And yes, that paragraph was indeed a moment of genius. It still makes me laugh every time I read it.

2069224
Seriously dude, that was perhaps the single best paragraph I have ever read in quite a while: it's not exactly and easy style of paragraph to write which made me soooooOOOooo happy!
Unrelatedly I picture the scientists who didn't get invited to those kinds of parties (in the Hitchhickers guide diescription) to be living directly below vinyl scratch XD

Anyways, if you ever need help with editing or anything just PM me. I would be soooo happy to do so seeing as your writing style is so refreshing and I'd love to help someone who's that original.

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