Days Gone By

by Nightwatcher

Days Gone By

Author's Note:

Just a little thing I had saved in my PC that I fixed up a bit and thought to put up here. Hope you like it.

Twilight sat a short distance away from a small collection of headstones. No tears rolled down her face like they had in days gone by, no sobs, no hugs from Celestia who stood vigil next to her. She couldn’t say she was sad, not any more at least, she hadn’t been sad here in a very long time. That feeling had long since been replaced by a... blankness, she couldn’t even say she missed them anymore, their names and faces haze at the back of her mind; the names on the tombstones having little effect on her.

It had been years since she’d even seen this place, her reasons for her daily visits in those days gone by lost to her. She’d long since found herself much to busy to make time to come; eventually she’d just... forgotten.

That scared her.

The headstones sat as they always had, neat in a row with not a blemish on them along with gifts she’d forgotten she’d gave next to each. Everything was as it always had been for as long as she could remember, save for one thing, a new addition to the collection.

It was a simple thing, the headstone was made of marble and the top half had a recreation of a star shaped cutiemark and just below that... was a name.

Twilight Sparkle

She sat looking at the stone for a time, thinking about the life that had led to it, a life that was no longer her’s and had not been in a very long time.

“I don’t understand why you insisted on this Twilight.” Celestia softly spoke from behind her.

“It just feels... like the right thing to do.” Twilight replied simply. “It has been for a long time.”

“But... Why?” She asked again.

“I haven’t been Twilight, the same Twilight that spent her life with them at least, in a very long time.” Twilight said. “The only thing I remember about them, about that old life, are these gravestones. She’s dead and gone and It’s time she joined her friends.”

“She?” Celestia asked.

“Twilight, the old one.” Twilight said, offering a sidelong glance at Celestia.

“What do you mean, you’re still the same mare.” Celestia protested.

“No, I’m not, ” She said, looking at the grave. “and I haven’t for a long time.”

Celestia sat in silence, unable to think of what to say.
“I might have the same body, but the mind is different. Her morals aren't mine, her dreams and aspirations aren’t mine. Everything that was her is gone. I don’t even think she would recognize me anymore.” She paused and collected herself before continuing.

“I know that we used to be friends, the best of friends.” She said, her hoof sweeping across the graves. “That we did great things together. Saved the world over and over. But I don’t remember any of it anymore. Like my memories have been replaced with second hoof accounts. Like a dream that fades just after you wake up. That mare, whoever she was, is gone. Replaced with me, like I’m a parasite, stealing her body away... I know I should feel... something, feel angry or sad, but I don’t. Why should I? It hasn’t been my life in a long, long, time.”

Celestia moved to place a wing across her, but stopped when she looked at Twilight’s face. She looked scared, she looked like she was about to fall apart. No, she'd already done that, Celestia could see that now as plain as day.

“I can’t even tell you when it happened. It just... faded away, replaced with the stories we tell to children. A whole life, just... gone, just like that. No matter how hard I try, I can’t make her life mine again, and I can’t live this one forever.” She took a deep, shaking, breath. “How much longer until It’s my grave there, with some new mare in my head saying the same thing to you all over again? The truth of that matter is that I’m not immortal, one day I’ll be gone, replaced with somepony new. Eventually, I’ll just forget everything that I once held so dear. One day my life is no longer mine, now nothing more than stories.”

Twilight looked at Celestia. “I think that’s why they chose to stay the way they were. They didn’t want to forget me, forget each other. Forget what made our friendship special. They wanted to stay together to the end. Not slowly drift away from each other like I did.”

Celestia was at a loss, unable to think of a way to console her. Twilight just sat there, an unreadable look in her face.

Finally, she spoke, but what she said shocked Celestia to her core.

“I want to die.” Twilight spoke, a determined look on her face.

Celestia recoiled in shock, “What?”

“I want to die!” Twilight screamed.

Celestia said nothing.

“I can’t live with this.” Twilight spoke, her voice barely more than a whisper now. “Knowing that I’ll eventually forget everything that I am, just like I did before. Knowing that this will never end, that I’ve got a eternity ahead of me and that I’ll forget all the days I’ve lived. Stuck in some kind of limbo in between life and death, no beginning, no end, just this... middle. A never ending middle.”
Celestia couldn’t believe what she was hearing, “You don’t mean that.”

“Yes... I do. Why do you think I made this?” She said, pointing at the headstone. “I refuse to live like this, I’ll go insane if I try.”

“But the only way to undo making you an Alicorn is if I did it, I’d be the one to.... kill you.” Celestia said, tears growing in her eyes. “Don’t do this to me.”

“Please... I want this.” Twilight beged.

“I won’t!” Celestia snapped.

“You already did!” Twilight yelled back. “I died under your nose and you didn’t even notice!”

The both held their heads down, unable to look at each other.

“I’m sorry.” Twilight said. “That was... wrong of me to say.”

“Don’t be. I can’t begin to imagine what your going through.” Celestia said, bringing Twilight into a tight hug.

She pulled away after a long time, “Is this what you really want?”

“Yes.” Said Twilight.

Celestia pulled Twilight back into her embrace and held her for what seamed like years.

“Ok...” Celestia said, moving back a bit.

Twilight took a deep breath and nodded, signalling that she was ready.

“I love you, Twilight.” Celestia cried, her horn glowing, wrapping Twilight in its golden glow.

“That’s something I could never forget.” Twilight said.Then, with a small flash, she vanished.

Her last words rang in Celestia’s head.

“I wont ever forget you Twilight.” She said, kissing her headstone.

Comments

[Evil Twilight]

Could use a little more explaining, but other than that, well done.

[Northgalus2002]

I agree with the previous reviewer that it could have used a little more explaining, I would have liked to see if Spike (a.k.a. Twi's #1 assistant) was among those buried. But you really captured how Twilight Sparkle would eventually feel literally outliving her friends and mourning her old life as an mortal unicorn instead of an immortal alicorn. Although the concept of Twilcorn (a.k.a. alicorn Twilight) has definitely grown on me since the end of season three, I have truly hoped that it didn't give Twilight immortality. I can imagine Celestia and Luna being immortal since they are not only princesses, they are basically the goddesses of sun and moon respectively. Still, it would really bite for a pony who has learned so much about friendship to lose her friends and knowing she would not see them again in the next world (if there is one).

I've read a number of "Twilcorn realizes immortality isn't all it's cracked up to be" fics and this is definitely among the best. Good show.

It's not that I'm afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens - Woody Allen

[goaway]

That picture was sad enough to begin with, but then I noticed the turtle shell ...

[Scrub-Life]

This is not only sad, it is like, the literal definition of depression.

[JellyMyst]

"Drink with me, to days gone by."

[PiercingSight]

Dude...

I don't think that death is as sad as the forgetfulness that comes with age.

Something about not feeling that same joy as we once had, about not knowing if we ever will again, about having forgotten something that was so important to us then... It's just not something that I want to experience, but perhaps inevitably will with age. Becoming an adult, I already feel that way for some of my childhood. I know there is joy yet ahead, but the joy of then has passed.

This one hit home.

Thank you.
-PiercingSight

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

sorry but Twilight just insulted her friends. Choosing death is NEVER an option.

[ynfiltra]

[josue]

4814274
except living forever violates the very laws of physics as everything dies even the universe because of entropy it was time for her to go let her be happy

[josue]

4814274
alicorn princess I believe are long-lived I believe that by removing the magic Celestia would have killed Twilight Sparkle by causing her to age by acceleration

[Discoris]

Well, i need to start writing journal

Oh wait, my life is extremely boring

Huh, thanks...