• Member Since 3rd Oct, 2013
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Pr1me Sh0ck


Student, means study, but sometimes I like to just think, and to dream, and that is what I do

T

Foolish enough to wander into the Everfree forest alone, Fluttershy is saved from a Timberwolf attack by a strange bipedal alien. Injured she is taken to the creature's cave. With the help of his changeling friend the alien saves Fluttershy's life and tells her the story of Second Chances.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 14 )

3682971 well it was supposed to be a single chapter story, and I do have another story running, buuuuut, I reckon twenty thumbs up and I'll write an epilogue, 50 thumbs up and ill do a short story on the whole thing.:twilightsmile:

Twenty six thumbs up later and i don't see an epilogue.
seriously dude this is epic there has to be more. It would be a crime not to do more.

3707652 I am terribly sorry, I've been trying to get back in the groove of writing my other story, the two combine a little and I need to make sure they don't screw each other up. Excuses aside there is a second chapter coming along.:twilightsmile:

3707687 thank you I'm looking forward to it :twilightsmile: :pinkiehappy:

Hay, 37 thumbs up and no epilogue are you still out there?

You're missing a ton of commas. It's a bit jarring. That's your main grammatical mistake.

Otherwise, keep it up m8! I would enjoy hearing of the adventures of Kalek/Silence, but if you choose not to continue them, that's up to you.

5029004

In the big block of exposition from the hologram I'm guessing? I'll go back over and re-edit it. And I may have been a bit preemptive ditching Kalek, what I mean to say is that his story will chill for a while so I can work on my other story.

5029397 well, not just there: in any sentence where you go from past to present tense, a comma must divide the two parts. I could toss some examples out there, if you want

My senses of sequels are tingling! :pinkiegasp:

5030013 Yeah look send me a quick PM with some examples. I'm quite amateurish with my grammar at times and I reckon this comma problem might be a bit bigger than just one chapter.

“To friendship and second chances chorused everyone else.”

Them quotes

6322498
Did you even read the A/N at the beginning of this chapter at all?

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