• Published 11th Dec 2013
  • 602 Views, 25 Comments

A Great And Powerful Feeling - bakersong



Cherry Pie a simple Earth Pony mare goes to a traveling magic show. Once the show begins she's immediately stricken by the blue unicorn mare. And the same could be said for the Trixie.

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The Great Hearth's Warming Eve

They laid down by the fireplace in her house warming up from spending a good part of the day outside making snowponies. Trixie and her had the best time, especially since Trixie was now living with her full time. She didn't give up her job but she stopped traveling and did shows for foals birthday parties now.

But that didn't matter since they now had each other and they were spending Hearths Warming Eve together. Though they never thought it would get here so fast since they both agreed not to take things fast, but one thing lead to another and now they were living together. They were happy just to snuggle up with each other by the fire and contempt to just nuzzle each other.

"So this is our first Hearth's Warming Eve together, what do you want to do?" Cherry asked.

"Well I know that you said we didn't have to get each other anything, but I couldn't help myself." Trixie said with a smile as she levitated a box over. "Well actually I got you two things, but one i'll show you later. This one you can have now."

"Oh, Trixie thank you! Speaking of which hold on, I also got you something." She said with a slight blush and went over to the closet to retrieve the gift. "Here, i'm sorry but I didn't get you anything more."

"it is alright, all I need is your smile. And i'm sure that my other gift will be more than enough a gift for both of us." Trixie said, though there was something to her tone.

"What do you mean?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"You will find out after we open our gifts and drink some hot coco." Trixie answered with a slight smile.

"Alright." She replied, but just as she was about to sit down they heard a loud crash from outside. "What was that?"

"I have no idea let's go check it out." Trixie said standing up going to the door.

When they got outside they couldn't believe what they saw in Cherry's front yard. What looked like some kind of phone booth was sitting there making some kind of weird sound. They both just stared at in shock for a second before three ponies came out, two unicorns and and earth pony.

One unicorn was brown with a darker brown mane and tail, his cutie mark was a spatula bent to what they guess looked like a musical note. The other unicorn was more gray with a black mane and tail his eyes were different colors, one orange, one blue, and they really didn't pay attention to his cutie mark because they didn't know what to make of it. The earth pony was also a brown color and had an hour glass as his cutie mark.

"I told you not to press that switch Onyx." The brown unicorn said to the other one.

"Hey he told me to Song, but hey doc where are we?" The one that they called Onyx asked the earth pony.

"Well we're in Ponyville, a parallel Ponyville to be exact." The earth pony said.

"So we're in another dimension? Great, how long until you can take us back to our own dimension? I want to be back in time for Hearth's Warming Eve." The one called Song said.

"It'll only take me about an hour to fix everything. Oh good evening ladies, we hope we didn't interrupt anything did we?" The one called doc asked turning to the two staring mares.

"Um, uh, who are you all?" Cherry asked.

"Well you can just call me the doctor, and these two are just someponies I picked up recently. The brown one here is named Baker Song, everypony calls him Song for short. The grey one is named Onyx Illusion, though you can just call him Onyx. And we are very sorry if we ruined something." The doctor said and they realized that he had a weird accent.

"Um, we were just about to open our presents." Trixie muttered.

"Oops, sorry about that then." Song said slightly hanging his head as well as Onyx.

"It's no problem, so um do you need any help?" Cherry asked.

"Well do you think you could let these two in while I do some repairs to my phone booth?" The Doctor asked. "I rather not them get in the way and send us to another dimension."

"Um, yeah sure. You did say it'll only take about an hour to repair whatever that thing is?" Cherry asked looking at the two strange stallions.

"Yes, give or take. Hopefully with these two out of the way it'll take less thought." The Doctor answered.

"Hey I told you I could help, I am two hundred years old after all." Song commented.

"Now, not in front of these two wonderful mares. After all they seem to be kind enough to let you in while I fix the Tardis." The Doctor replied.

"Fine, thank you by the way." Song said nodding to the two mares.

"Yeah, thanks." Onyx also said.

"Um, no problem right Trixie?" Cherry asked.

"If it's okay with you, then it's okay with me." Trixie said nuzzling her.

"On second thought if you two are busy, i'm sure the Doctor wouldn't mind if we hung out here." Song said after raising and an eyebrow.

"No, no it's fine really. We weren't doing anything." Cherry answered both her and Trixie now weren't blushing because of the cold.

"Are you sure? I mean we can just cast a warming spell on us and we'll be fine." Onyx said with a slight smirk.

"So are you two coming in or what?" Trixie asked pulling Cherry back to the door.

They followed them to the inside of the door and decided to stand rather than sit on one of the couches. The four talked a little bit the two stallions did their best to avoid talking about where they come from and how they met the Doctor. And soon it was time to leave.

"Well it's been a lovely forty minutes, but I guess we'll see you all around in our own way." Song said before giving a nod and walked into the booth.

"Yeah, bye." Onyx said also stepping into the booth.

"Have a lovely evening ladies, and oh and early congratulations to you Ms. Cherry on your pregnancy later." The Doctor said and before they could respond he stepped inside and the booth started to make sound again and before they knew it the thing disappeared.

"Well that was strange, I wonder what he meant by me getting..." She was cut off by a pair of lips.

"You know, I think since they left it's time for your second present. Meet me upstairs in your bedroom." Trixie said with half lidded eyes before she went back into the house.

"Well, looks like tonight is going to be a good night." She said to herself already forgetting what the Doctor told her as she rushed upstairs.

Author's Note:

There we are, tell me if you want it to continue though. And have a happy Hearths Warming Eve, and merry Christmas!

Comments ( 20 )

I'm sorry, but I didn't really like this fic much. I felt that it didn't have enough relationship building, romance, and internal conflict within the relationship. Those three things are what usually make a good romance fic in my eyes, that and some light bits of comedy thrown in. All in all, i'd say you made a good effort, but I gave a downvote. I would also make the chapters longer, add in some description in the paragraphs, don't just tell the reader whats happening, describe it, make the reader feel as though they are in the story, a part of the story itself so to speak.

That's all I have to say on the matter.

3725592 Ah, trust me this was an attempt at writing a short story when i'm used to writing a bit of a longer story. That and this was more a little fun story I wrote to take a break from my main story for a little bit. But yeah I do agree with you that those are what makes a good romance story a good romance story, but this was just a little fun project I wanted to put down.

3725828 Ok now that makes sense. I'll look in on your other story.

3735337 Well A Beautiful Night is going through some editing so the first few chapters in it might still have more grammar mistakes in them then the later chapters.

3735385 Well, nobodies perfect. haha

3735490 Eh, yeah but unfortunately I've gotten three or five complaints about it so i'm gonna have to fix those mistakes, due to the fact that if at least so many people complain about it my ocd thing kicks in. It's not a major problem just felt compelled to fix them now. Good thing it's been mostly small grammar or spelling mistakes.

3735572 true, and have you by chance read New Land, New Customs, New Life...New Love?

3735747 No not yet. I've been busy for the past week or so and haven't really been on.

3736246 Well Feel free to read it whenever. IT's one of my most popular so far, and the sequel has a few chapters up as well, it won't be finished for a while though, as I am currently working on some of my older fics, rewriting ones I believe suck and adding new chapters to fics long forgotten. The usual stuff. haha

3736480 I'll stop by later. But it'll still take a minute to read since I have over forty other chapters of fan fics I need to catch up on.

3736570 its 32 chapters long and 47,000 words. itll take a while

3736744 Ah, you're talking to a guy who can read a five hundred page book in three days. With distractions of course.

3736799 And your talking to a guy who can read a 700 page book in a day, with less than a few distractions.

3742640 Eh, I have to do other stuff. Unfortunately I can't spend that much time on reading anymore. So in other words life stuff and all that does catch up eventually.

3742685 im in the army. i do a lot more than you think haha

3742741 Okay, and as much as I would love to chat about what we each do my night life is calling right now. So I have to go and write the next chapter to my fanfiction. Which to tell the truth I work in construction with my dad so I have a lot more to do than what people may think because of my schedule that I had of releasing stuff.

3742790 understandable. I'm about to go now, I've got patrol duty to get to in an hour and I need to get all my cold weather gear in order. Trust me, It's fucking cold in alaska.

3742910 Well it may not be as cold as it up there, but in Missouri it's pretty cold. And then see ya around then.

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