Cherry Pie a simple Earth Pony mare goes to a traveling magic show. Once the show begins she's immediately stricken by the blue unicorn mare. And the same could be said about Trixie.
(Slight scene with Doctor Whooves in last chapter.)
Chapters (4)
- Member Since 13th Sep, 2013
- offline last seen 2 hours ago
bakersong
favorite character is applejack and i have been a brony for a while now
bakersong
Joined 13th Sep, 2013 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- SFaccountant · 176k words · 534 19 · 9.1k views
- Mountainmanmad · 179k words · 1,107 72 · 18k views
- Lack of Tact · 1.1k words · 83 4 · 2.1k views
- Ausbrony · 422k words · 597 50 · 12k views
- Helljumper206 · 67k words · 115 13 · 4.7k views
- Dorath · 42k words · 419 10 · 5.9k views
- Lightning Spear · 79k words · 275 28 · 9k views
- Firesight · 436k words · 1,898 74 · 29k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.088 seconds
Total duration
1,125 users online
2,043,676 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This line read really weird.
3612679 I blame my proof reader for not catching that.
3613948
"and even Equestria itself from Nightmare Moon with her help."
This reads a bit easier.
3614204 okay will do some editing tonight or something, thanks for being an extra eye...
3614334
lol.
I'm sorry, but I didn't really like this fic much. I felt that it didn't have enough relationship building, romance, and internal conflict within the relationship. Those three things are what usually make a good romance fic in my eyes, that and some light bits of comedy thrown in. All in all, i'd say you made a good effort, but I gave a downvote. I would also make the chapters longer, add in some description in the paragraphs, don't just tell the reader whats happening, describe it, make the reader feel as though they are in the story, a part of the story itself so to speak.
That's all I have to say on the matter.
3725592 Ah, trust me this was an attempt at writing a short story when i'm used to writing a bit of a longer story. That and this was more a little fun story I wrote to take a break from my main story for a little bit. But yeah I do agree with you that those are what makes a good romance story a good romance story, but this was just a little fun project I wanted to put down.
3725828 Ok now that makes sense. I'll look in on your other story.
3735337 Well A Beautiful Night is going through some editing so the first few chapters in it might still have more grammar mistakes in them then the later chapters.
3735385 Well, nobodies perfect. haha
3735490 Eh, yeah but unfortunately I've gotten three or five complaints about it so i'm gonna have to fix those mistakes, due to the fact that if at least so many people complain about it my ocd thing kicks in. It's not a major problem just felt compelled to fix them now. Good thing it's been mostly small grammar or spelling mistakes.
3735572 true, and have you by chance read New Land, New Customs, New Life...New Love?
3735747 No not yet. I've been busy for the past week or so and haven't really been on.
3736246 Well Feel free to read it whenever. IT's one of my most popular so far, and the sequel has a few chapters up as well, it won't be finished for a while though, as I am currently working on some of my older fics, rewriting ones I believe suck and adding new chapters to fics long forgotten. The usual stuff. haha
3736480 I'll stop by later. But it'll still take a minute to read since I have over forty other chapters of fan fics I need to catch up on.
3736570 its 32 chapters long and 47,000 words. itll take a while
3736744 Ah, you're talking to a guy who can read a five hundred page book in three days. With distractions of course.
3736799 And your talking to a guy who can read a 700 page book in a day, with less than a few distractions.
3742640 Eh, I have to do other stuff. Unfortunately I can't spend that much time on reading anymore. So in other words life stuff and all that does catch up eventually.
3742685 im in the army. i do a lot more than you think haha
3742741 Okay, and as much as I would love to chat about what we each do my night life is calling right now. So I have to go and write the next chapter to my fanfiction. Which to tell the truth I work in construction with my dad so I have a lot more to do than what people may think because of my schedule that I had of releasing stuff.
3742790 understandable. I'm about to go now, I've got patrol duty to get to in an hour and I need to get all my cold weather gear in order. Trust me, It's fucking cold in alaska.
3742910 Well it may not be as cold as it up there, but in Missouri it's pretty cold. And then see ya around then.
My oc Baker Song