A wise man once told me- you should always follow your dreams and become what ever you want. So I became a brony. I wonder if that was a good idea?
During a experiment Twilight made a mistake taking her and the rest of the the elements if Harmony to earth and into a person's apartment. Now Tom and the main 6 needs to find a way back to Equestria and not let anybody find out there here.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Should I put "example" in my stories plz I need feed back
i love it and when will more chapters of this story come out
2995422 yes you should
and then chaos begins hahahaha
update and then theres the magic thats missing maybe... idk just gonna go along
ok and i will not judge you on how short the chapter is
i got a question why is there no words in this chapter
now i can see it and i love it
I get only 3 hours of sleep these days for writing stories and Xbox codbo2 ga gaming so yup
you should write long chapters please and i love it
Yes to the long chapters.
looooong chapters
a bit hastey but its an update anyway
I can see this story grow but your grammar is a bit off and few spelling errors (I think) in the chapter. I only read this chapter but other than that I like this story and I will read more. Grammar should be fixed as well as punctuation. You should look for an editor or a prereader trust me they help alot and if it weren't for my prereader and editor my stories will not be as good. My writing is bad but it has improved a whole lot with them. I like where this story is going and I will read more. If you need more tips or a preread let me know fyi I'm not the best prereader but I can point out the defaults before you post a new chapter. I wish you luck on this story and on your future stories.
I'm pretty sure its illegal for a civilian to have nukes
Basic life tech not fucking nukes like nano watch robot butler that kind of shit
other then a little bit of punctual errors the plot is solid
(vein pop)
Defiantly needs grammar improvements and maybe smoother timing. Honestly, in one paragraph they're in equestria and by the end of it, they are not.
I think timing may be a bit of a problem. Also, punctuation and grammar may also be a issue with how smooth the story progresses because as of now, it feels blocky when I read it
dam i love this aaaaaaaaa
dam i love this and pleas more
dam i love this aaaaaaaa
oh no my iner grammar nazi is here!WHY DO YOU NOT USE GRAMMAR MARKS! ALSO IMPROVE ON SPELLING!
Nuggetmanu2 why is this story On Hiatus and i got a question when will more chapters for this story come out
Oh man I just read this story and... gah. Obviously you have a lot of potential, and you also very obviously put a lot of effort into this but I can't say this story is good. Here click here to go to the official FIMFiction writing guide, it will help you solve all the problems in this story.
Those problems being bad pacing, unnatural dialogue, really silly stuff (such as pressing a button and having broken stuff replaced instantly), boring characters (our Human protagonist's only character trait here is that he is rich), and the grammar. Seriously just read the writing guide, watch YouTube tutorials, and just in general study on how to write. Now by all means don't stop writing this, there are people who love it! That is more then enough to keep going! However just remember to keep studying the art of writing on the sidelines, and over time incorporate that into your chapters as they come. That way you can not only study on how to be a better author but also get experience at the same time.
Now, I will follow you because I am convinced that you will one day write amazing front page worthy stories, and I want to know when that day comes.
I will leave you with this:
Bad English
Balls
Balls 2
Blt balls 3
3180946
https://youtu.be/p_eYizPJggs
10843706
https://youtu.be/p_eYizPJggs
imposter
10843714
https://youtu.be/p_eYizPJggs
3042885
don't worry he's rich