A Fancy Surprise (Prologue)
The evening sun shined through the windowsill as orange overtook the sky. Rarity strolled through her room as she tidied up the place after the days work. She cleared her desk of scrap paper and pinned her designs to be used on the wall above it. Mannequins were lined up in place off to the side with each covered in a different piece in progress. Fabrics were rolled back up and placed neatly on their respective shelves as she turned on the lights and closed the drapes on the windows.
She headed downstairs to her work room to continue her cleanup before fully closing the store. Fabrics, accessories, and designs littered the room. Books stacked messily on one of the desks as slips of paper stick out of multiple spaces of each book. Notes, scraps of paper, and scraps of fabric nearly bursting from the drawer. Designs are pinned up almost everywhere; they're on the bed frame, the mirror, the walls, even the mannequins themselves. "On second thought," she thought to herself, "perhaps I'll clean this room up some other time." Just as she closed the drapes in the work room she is interrupted by a knock at the door.
"Just a minute!" Rarity called out. She made her way to the door and put on a smile as she greeted her customer. "Welcome to Carousel Boutique! How may I help yo-" she opened her eyes "-ooooouuuu?!" Taking a step back from the surprise, she saw Fancy Pants at her door. "Fa-Fa-Fa-Fancy Pants?!" she stammered, " Wha-wha-what are you doing here?!"
"Well," he started, "Its quite nice to see you too, Miss Rarity. Its rather interesting as to why I'm here. Perhaps we could discuss this inside?" As Fancy Pants looked at her establishments surroundings, Rarity took a quick check at the boutique to confirm that was organized, clean, and decent to have Fancy Pants enter without worry.
"Why, yes! Please, come in," she told him as she pulled up her chaise lounge for him to sit in. "Would you like tea? Coffee? Water? Anything I could get you at all?"
"Ah, yes," Fancy Pants said to her as he sat on the lounge, making himself comfortable, "some tea would be rather nice, although not entirely necessary if you don't wish to make any currently."
"Oh, no, no, no. Its perfectly fine," Rarity said to him as she quickly poked her head through the kitchen door way to fill a kettle with water and set it upon the stove. "I was just thinking about making some, it helps relax the nerves and prepares me to wind down for the day" she said giving off a nervous laugh. She swiftly brought down two tea cups, two spoons, and two saucers and set them up on a small table for them as she nervously smiled. "So... what are you doing all the way here in Ponyville... and not in Canterlot?"
"Ah, yes, my little trip here," he started. "I apologize for the intrusion on such short notice. It's rather odd to talk about, honestly. I've been feeling rather... stale, so to speak. Been wanting to get away from it all. Being one of the more well known ponies in Canterlot has its merits, but even the most popular of ponies desire something different once in a while. That, exactly, is what brings me here. I was thinking about it, and I remembered that-" A loud whistling sound cut off Fancy Pants as Rarity hopped up in surprise.
"Oh dear, I'm sorry about the interruption," she apologized. He shook his head slightly as he motioned for her to proceed to the kitchen. The whistling slowly died down back to silence as Rarity brought out the kettle and tea leaves. Setting a cloth down for the kettle to sit on, she filled the cups with the hot water to let the leaves soak. "Sorry for the interruption, you were saying?"
"Yes," he continued, "I was thinking of ways to take somewhat of a vacation away from Canterlot for a while and I remembered meeting your friends at the garden party that they joined mid way through." Rarity looked off to the side in embarrassment, still a little flustered about the whole birthday garden party crashing. "And as I thought about it further, I had somewhat of an idea. Would be quite the experience to have. You and your friends are rather normal ponies, living normal lives not bogged down by the stress of popularity and such. Perhaps if you and your friends would allow it, I wouldn't mind trying out your professions for a day or so, just to see what its like doing something different for a change."
Rarity choked a little on a sip of her tea as she processed what Fancy Pants was asking of her; as he quickly sat up alarmed, thinking she might be troubled. After a few embarrassing coughs and motioning to him that she was fine, she began, "E-excuse me?!" Getting up from her chair, she set down her tea as she levitated a wash cloth to wipe her mouth. "But why here? Why at all, really? You're probably the most important pony to know in Canterlot."
"Exactly," Fancy Pants cut her off. "But here, I'm not anypony special, at least not to anyone but you. As I mentioned, its rather odd to talk about, albeit rather embarrassing to other Canterlot ponies... but you must understand, please. It's a matter of self satisfaction-" he continued with a quick sip of tea "-I desire something different for once. A new experience, something not possible for me to get in Canterlot. Its obvious that you were quite surprised from the instant I even suggested such a thing, you could only imagine how other Canterlot ponies, regardless of popularity status, would react."
After a small moment of silence, Rarity took a deep breath to recuperate herself and her thoughts. "Alright," she continued, "I... I think I understand. I have, maybe once, felt the same way before." Taking a swig of her tea, she finished it off to clear her throat. The warmth of the liquid spread throughout her stomach as she gave a slight sigh of relief. "If that really is your decision, I suppose I could ask my friends if they would be willing to allow you to assist them for a day or so."
"Ah, splendid!" Fancy Pants stated excitedly as he got up from the lounge, "I knew you would understand, Miss Rarity. Ever since I bumped into you in Canterlot I knew you were a pony of popularity, but still one of the comprehending variety, able to think for oneself rather than blindly follow others." Rarity gave off a slightly embarrassed chuckle as she thanked him for the compliment. "Well, now that that is settled, perhaps you could point me to the nearest hotel so that I may get myself situated for a while?"
"Oh, no, please. Allow me to accommodate for you," she insisted as she cut him off from the front door. "I have a guest room you could stay in for the mean time, besides, Ponyville doesn't actually have a hotel... or a motel for that matter."
"Oh? Not even a motel? What does Ponyville have for tourism then?" he inquired.
"Well... We have an inn," Rarity answered him.
"Whats wrong with the inn, then? Aren't they generally rather homey?" he asked of her.
"Well, generally speaking yes, but the inn here is rather different," she explained to him. "Normally places with inns would probably be more homey than say a motel, perhaps, but the inn here is really suited for travelers that don't tend to stay for more than a day. Its more like a rest stop than an inn, there's no luxuries there really."
"I see," he paused for a minute. He contemplated the offer for no more than a minute, even if he was here to get away from the luxury of popularity and standards of Canterlot, the basics would still be desirable. "I suppose if you're offering and willing to allow me to lodge here, I have no other choice but to accept your generous offer."
"Wonderful!" she exclaimed as she used her magic to move her lounge back to the wall where she kept it. "If you follow me this way, the guest room is just around the corner over here." He followed her from the entrance of the establishment to one of the rooms further in the back of the store. They're immediately greeted by the mess of the work room that is the guest room. "I... um," she stuttered. "On second thought... perhaps you could make yourself at home in the kitchen and make something to eat for yourself while I... tidy up a bit in here."
"Ah, of course. Just enough to sleep comfortably will be fine enough, no real rush. There's still plenty of light, perhaps I'll check out the town as well." He made his way to the front of the store as he looked at the back room by the fitting stage. "This is the kitchen, yes?"
"Yes, through those doors, please, make yourself at home." As Fancy Pants went into the kitchen, Rarity turned around and looked at the mess in the room and gave a heavy sigh. "Well, Rarity, its some other time, now."
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I sense many shenanigans in the far future.
2586692
I hope to deliver it well.
Shame there's no Spike tag, two guys raised in Canterlot, skilled with upper class talents and concepts, and neither of them having any real interest in dealing with the lifestyle, I could only imagine they'd hit it off given the chance, gentledrake and gentlestallion that they are.
2586830
Well, this might be a spoiler alert, depends how you want to look at it.
I didn't put Spike as a tag because he's not a very prominent part of the story. But he will be mentioned during Twilight's Chapter. He's not gonna be in it much, but he'll be there for a small portion. Just wait and see.Hm no comedy or romance tag. This might be an intresting concept. I look forward to seeing where this goes.
I'd love to see some Sparity in here. What would Fancypants think of Rarity having a relationship with a dragon, I wonder.
2587071
Its not really a full comedic thing, so the tag wouldn't really fit. There will be shenanigans, however. Also yes, no romance in this one.
2587122
Sparity might be mentioned, we'll see.
You might want to look around at one of the pre-readers groups to get some help editing. There are some typos that otherwise detract from a story with a lot of potential.
Oooh, I like where this is going. Would love to read more :)
2587191
Cool your jets, there. Unless you want to point them out to me, I just checked and there was nothing I could find.
2587285
As you wish:
Designed are pinned up almost everywhere; they're on the bed frame, the mirror, the walls, on the mannequins themselves.
Design
2587333
Designs*
Also changed it, thanks for the heads up. Although I doubt one or two errors would take away from the entire story and distract the reader.
Is his wife okay with this?
2587416
I don't really go with the concept of Fleur De Lis as his wife since it's not actually set in stone. A lot of people like to go with it, but it doesn't really convince me. She wasn't at the Wonderbolts derby with him, and she wasn't at the garden party either, she was only with him when they bumped into her.
Very well written and a great read. Can't wait for the next part!
A good idea for a story, i do have a question about your tenses in your writing. It feels a bit...off? Everything felt like it was going to happen rather than happening at that moment. (not sure if that is the right choice of wording to explain it)
(If you want examples of what i mean i can send you a PM with an example)
Aside that i look forward to future chapters.
It's interesting that you use the present tense. I don't particularly see a need for it in this story, but to each their own.
This prologue is...passable. Certainly not bad in any form of the word, but it doesn't really stick out to me as "great" writing. Merely passable.
My apologies if I seem rude.
2590296
2589555
It was an experimental process. I've never actually written much to anything in the present tense. I wanted to see if I could do it even somewhat decently. I might go back and switch it to past tense before I even release the next chapter. Thanks for the feedback though.
2590717
That would be preferable if you would do so.
2591597
Can do, will do. I'd like to think I did present tense rather alright, but no, I totally agree with you. Although I managed to do it, present tense does feel weird. So no worries, future chapters will be past tense.
yo where da clop at?
2592572
If you scroll to the top of the page, there's a button called "Browse." Hover your mouse over it and there's a category called "Clopfics" enjoy.
You've cleaned up a lot of it, but there's still some relics of the present tense here and there.
For example:
and
Change those "are"s to "were"s and you'll be fine.
My regards,
Pond
so is this going to be a rarity x fancy pants story like they going to be together at the end
2601747
No, there's no shipping at all. It's merely a slice of live as Fancy Pants gains an insight on what other ponies do for a living, struggling to comprehend how any pony could do what they do, especially on a daily basis.
This should be pretty interesting...lets see where it goes!
Can't wait to see more, since Fancy Pants has intrigued me. He's the kind of celebrity that isn't all that stuck up and can like and understand a lot of people. I was kind of surprised that he didn't call the Mane Six "disgusting" like the hosts of the garden party would have. "Charmingly rustic" yes...
Keep up the good work, can't wait to see the Canterlot unicorn get down and dirty
The Summary needs Paragraphs, for a good starter.
2649182 Wait, wasn't he the Stallion Rarity met in Canterlot? The one ho was actually kind to her and invited her to all kinds of fancy activities?
I think Trender Hoof was coining that expression about Ponyville.