Good...quite excellent indeed. I cannot wait to see more, and I wish you luck in your writing endeavors! I'll be watching. I'm already on the edge of my seat waiting to see where this goes.

This is not good at all, I really hope she isn't dead. Good chapter again

4386779
You really shouldn't throw around 'Kkat Approved' ...that's a recipe for disaster, given what happened with Somber. Took a year to get rid of it when Sethisto made that mistake.

Also, that big '2' in the title is terrifying and unnecessary. You'd be better off leaving it out, I think. It's gotten some negative attention already for it- only reason I know of this fic.

I realy don't know what to say, mostly because I don't want to be mean about it, so here is my big three gripes;

first off, having the perspective of the story consonantly switch for first pony to third pony view is just jarring for the immersion, but if that's going to be your style then best copy how it was used in "Pink Eyes" there it did switch for first to third a lot, but did it in a way that didn't brake the flow of the story.

Second, have two different characters talk in the same paragraph is a bit confusing, now it's not like I haven't seen it don in all of the F.E. story's I have read, but it's something that is more rare, with the big five story's keeping it to one character talking for each paragraph. it's not a big problem, but it dose get confusing to know who is talking if there is not adequate descriptions in the paragraph, add in a third or fourth character, and it can be trouble.

third, for such short chapters the grammatical errors are for more apparent. It not a big problem to me, heck read "Murky Number Seven" and in it every now and then it has sentences that are just painful to read, but this is also a story of which that one chapter can take me all day to read, I mean it has hellishly long chapters, so most grammatical problem spots get lost among the sea of words.

now I just want anyone reading this to know that I'm far from any kind of English major, so my criticism come from more being a "Fallout Equestria" fan, then anything elss. So my criticism is more about me wanting this to be good, then wanting to nitpick, if I was being nitpicky I would not have registered here to just type this...

4598117

Hey, keep the criticisms coming, I need them to improve, y'know?

Also, if you read the note I put in, that was a "Sorry about the wait" chapter. To expand on that, I've been dealing with Family, Friends, and personal mental issues as of late. Not only that, but I've also gotten to the point where I criticize everything I write to the degree of fanaticism. I keep chucking out ideas at any little gripe of my own.

I'm trying to stay on board, but with all this going on, it just gets hard. If it comes down to, I may put this and my other story on hiatus.

Before I forget, the 1st Person to 3rd Person is where I picked up from losing all my work. Didn't realize I had actually done that, so it should be handled in the future.

4598394 if you can find someone to edit this for you, it sould make it easier, they can help you keep things more consistent, and you can push for longer chapters.

On a side note, this hole chapter feels more like a chapter two, or the end of a chapter one, I kind of like to have read about Fail actually being at the sky port when it was full of pony's, with it already abandoned it just feels like another part of the wasteland. Like with the mining town and the town with the seer, in "Project Horizons" were we get to see it full of pony's, but when Black Jack returns to them to find them empty, it just screams something is seriously wrong. I'm just saying that we barley know the two characters and their already in a big event, which is not a bad thing, but with the length of the chapter, there is just too much going on. Not to say I would do any better, but I'd like to get to know the two main characters more in a more relaxed setting.

soooo huh? lil pip dead?

mind if I do a reading for youtube?

5104744

OhmygoshOhmygosh!

S-sure! I-I haven't done much on it yet, t-though...

5104744

If you do, please send me a link! I've been meaning to give this story a read for months, but haven't been able to get around to it. An audio reading would be a great help.

5136420
sure I t may take some time though

So, FoE 2 died? If so, that was pretty quick.

5197139

No, just on hiatus due to school, work, and extra-curricular. I haven't forgotten about it, though!

Very good so far. I'm assuming you took inspiration from that series of fanart that got really popular as of late, I forgot they guy's name, but I'd been searching for a fic like this for a while now.

Oh dear, s-so much activity about my story out of nowhere. o-o

I'm still so busy.. I wanna update it though...

5343211 it was 'Jetwave' wasn't it?

5490680

Not sure what you two are talking about, but I just LOVE your profile picture! I read that book earlier last year, it was great!

5490921 thank you, kind sir/madam

5490680 Yeah, I think so.

4598394 Take a chill pill. It's OK if thing aren't perfect. I doubt even Kkat was happy with her first draft.

Also, good story. I think this could be a great new addition to the Fallout Equestria cannon.

5533673

*Grammar Nazi incoming*

...Canon, not cannon.

5535575
I simply meant that I love this story and would like to see copious amounts of chapters get posted. Soon.

5753055

I understand... I'll tell you what. School had been rough, and I need to focus on that first and foremost. After that... I'll See about continuing this gem.

While we're on the subject, it would be a great help if I had an editor or two, possibly even a co-writer or something similar to help spit ball ideas and what not. I haven't quite figured out the plot yet, and that was just what I came up with months ago, so it's bound to have changed or been forgotten.

Well, that's a really interesting story you got there. Truth be told, I didn't expect too much, seeing as how most 'fanmade' sequels of stories I've read so far were average at best, but this one really was a pleasant surprise.

I'd love to write a thorough review for this story, but considering that 4598117 pretty much sums up what little points of criticism I have for it, I'll just cut this short and say: I'm really excited to see where this whole thing is going, even though I suppose that's still quite uncertain.

Now, using the main characters' offspring as new main characters brings you a lot of new possibilities, especially when it comes to Faith, seeing as how there are no implications of Littlepip and Homage having (or trying to have) a child in the main story. I really like what I've read so far, but I think that maybe you should give us some more information about the characters and their, well, characters in the next chapters. What's their backstory, what do they think about the past, the war, about the future, etc.

On a side note, your style really makes the story nice to read. While the changes of perspective tend to be a little confusing, you did good work with the first person perspective, and I like how you made Faith comment on the events in the story every now and then.

Now, I don't know where you're planning to go with this thing or if you have decided to put it on an indefinite hiatus by now, but if you're planning to write more of it and could use some assistance, I think I might be able to lend you a hand. I'm everything but a master when it comes to writing, but I have some experience with editing and I guess I could throw in the one or other suggestion every once in a while if it helps.
Let me know if you're interested and I'll get back to you shortly.
In any case, this is a really promising story and I hope to read more of it at some point.

Wish I could write good stories, but I've been re-learning how to write stories ever since I got to grade ten at September 2015.

Not to be rude or anything but how much longer until the next chapter?

7312043

I'm sorry, this one is on indefinite hiatus until I can get on my feet in IRL.

7324168 Will it eventually be completed?

RIP its Cancelled

Should prove an interesting read one day, if it is still in dev. You needed a idea bouncer/editor?

Ripper Pipper, and rip this story.