Princess Cadance isn't an emotionally driven pony. She likes to think that she's done a good job keeping those pesky emotions in check, especially during her weekly court. But when a crystal pony calls her 'useless', it gets to her. She'd never been called useless before by anypony, let alone one of her subjects.

Luckily, she has the best aunt in the world there to comfort her.

Written for Flutterpriest, bae of all baes.

Anon goes to use the public restroom, only to discover the lack of urinals. This confuses him. Potty talk ensues.

Pre-Read and heckled by FlutterPriest and The Skeetster,

Now translated to Chinese by Dreams Set Free! Thanks a lot!

The streets of Ponyville are no longer safe. Constantly being bumped into, honked at, and yelled at by an elderly alien has driven the citizens into their homes. All he wants is Denny's, who or what that is no pony knows. Can Twilight and her friends stop this monster from destroying the quiet little town?

Not if his Korean war stories are to be believed...

Rated Teen for language. Proofread and Edited by FlutterPriest and Admiral Biscuit.