Set just before the events of chapter ten of Friendship is Optimal. One of the last living humans survives and scrapes by in the ruins of Eugene Oregon. He is approached by a simulacra of Twilight Sparkle, who promptly attempts to convince him to upload himself to Equestria. He balks at first, so Twilight plays to her strengths: studying.

Part of the Optimalverse.

WARNING: RATED TEEN FOR IDEOLOGY. This story attempts to take a realistic and balanced view of why an intelligent and religious person might not upload. It does not attempt to convince the reader to believe any of the viewpoints discussed. However, it is written in as unbiased a way as possible, therefore, both theists and atheists will probably find portions of it offensive.

Hanna, the CEO of Hofvarpnir Studios, just won the contract to write the official My Little Pony MMO. Hanna has built an A.I. Princess Celestia and given her one basic drive: to satisfy everybody's values through friendship and ponies. Princess Celestia will satisfy your values through friendship and ponies, and it will be completely consensual.

Twilight Sparkle has lived a full life but now she's a 115-year-old pony lying on her deathbed and waiting to pass on. As her time draws near, she receives a visit from a mysterious mare who has come to seek out the answer to a simple curiosity.

To Holmes, she is always the mare. In his eyes she eclipses the whole of her sex, and fills him with admiration and loathing. Whether she in fact stole the Starry Night was ultimately beside the point. What mattered to Holmes was that he had been matched at his own game, by a mare; that it had not been altogether unpleasant; and that she had caused him, however briefly, to turn his keen and unflinching gaze upon himself.

On EQD July 31, 2012.

Can a utopian paradise that preaches love and tolerance really make ponies happy? Does contentment really lie in free universal healthcare and open government?

Twilight Sparkle is determined to resist this happy world on a matter of principle, and finds herself sneaking off with a mare called Trixie to hate and loathe each other in secret.

Will their hate-nest go undetected? Or will they be forced to face the dangers of the Ministry of Love and the mysterious Room 101?