• Member Since 8th Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen Apr 12th, 2018

QuilliamPenn


I AM ALIVE ONCE MORE

T

Fed up with the constant fighting of his parents; who are all but split up, a Pegasus named Sketchbook decides to move to Ponyville, However Mere hours after he moves into his new home, Sketch meets a unicorn named Lyra whom he finds the ability to talk to and share his opinions with, and not be judged or ridiculed; an entirely new experience for him.


Proofreading done by the wonderful CanoLathra.

(This is where it all started! The very first story i ever really wrote, featuring a very early, Self-Ripped-Off version of my own OC! Don't expect anything exceptional, but if you wanna know where i started with writing; Ponies or otherwise, start here!)

Chapters (11)
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Comments ( 95 )

Well that was ....Okay? Not bad but it could use a few tweaks. And that LAYOUT! :pinkiesick: Pinkie's face says it all.

2273938
Thank you for the feedback.
It's my first attempt at something like this, so i tried my best.
I will see what to do about that layout...
Would you happen to have any suggestions as what to do with said layout......?

2273956 Just look at the layout that's used by stories in the feature box!

Lyra's Personalitiy is intriguing, please hurry and make more

2274044 That's what i was going for! I am glad you like it. I hope to have the next chapter out soon!:ajsmug:

Not bad! As has been said- a few details/smoothing would REALLY solidify the overall feel of the story.....
(breaking up Sketch's backstory-dialogue with Lyra, more 'show' less 'tell' that sort of thing!

but I like it! I shall watch this with interest.... =)

2276586
I completely understand what you mean.
Thank you for the feedback!

Just thought I'd let you know that a young FEMALE horse is a fillv, and a young MALE horse is a colt.s

PS. PM me if you need any help with editing or poofreading, I'd be glad to help

2278620
Thank you for letting me know that because i really had no idea:facehoof:
I will fix this as soon as i get the chance to sit down and do it properly.
And i may take you up on that proofreading offer:ajsmug:

2279547
If you want I can download the text file and email you the corrected document when I'm done.
If you need help with anything, pm or email me.

Only thing I noticed- try to start more sentences without 'Sketch____'
Other than that, not bad at all =)

2300590
Thank you! I will work on this.
You see this is why it is good to have critics :pinkiehappy:

Chapter 3 is at the proofreaders!
Expect it to be uploaded soon :pinkiehappy:
This one's gonna be a good one so get ready!

2337434
I don't know about wonderful... :twilightsmile:
But seriously, this next chapter is great and I know you will all enjoy.

Due to unforseen circumstances, I will not be able to work on chapter three this next week.
My appologies.
The wonderful faithful proofreader,
CanoLathra

I loved the beginning, but at the mid-end it felt a bit rushed and not as good as the beginning. Overall I'd say that it was okay, but could be better.
But, im really interested in this story and I look forward to reading more!

2352539
Glad to know you like it!
Looking back on it i did rush the first chapter a bit, but at least now i know what NOT to do :pinkiehappy:

there was one that sold literally nothing but apples and apple related products.

trolledbot.net/pix/1552.png

Sounds about right. :rainbowlaugh:

Chapter 3 is coming soon !:pinkiehappy:
I promise!

Issues came up and i haven't been able to do much. You know this weird thing called life? Yeah. That.

Uh oh. Don't do something you'll regret Sketch.......

The little cameos I see from the doctor from time to time in different fics kinda gives me a bit of a headcannon idea that his jumping from universe to universe looking for someone or something.

2434624
That......
Is the most fantastic story idea.......

2434739 :pinkiehappy: thanks:pinkiehappy:. It kinda bugs me that I have these great ideas from time to time but I can't do anything with them because I'm a noobish writer:unsuresweetie:

This will be interesting

2434915
Maybe after i finish up this story i will do one on that. (Unless you want to :) )
I feel i could portray the Doctor well enough. And dont feel like a noobish writer, everyone is a noob at some point! Remember this is really my first MLP Fanfic like....ever, and it started off iffy (1st chapter ) and i think i have improved greatly! (3rd chapter) Just practice and take pride in what you write!

2436909 sounds like a plan you can run with the doctor idea and I'll keep working on my writing talent. Someday I hope to write either a doctor who or professor paradox fic but atm I don't think I'm up to capturing their personalitys accurately yet:ajsleepy:

Hello everyone. Sorry I took so long, but chapter 4 is finally proofread and posted! I hope you enjoy.

Yay :yay: I hit over 200 views :yay:
I feel like a kid who just lost his first tooth or something :twilightsheepish:

200 isn't too big of a deal compared to others, but hey, it's something:moustache:

“Doctor who?” Sketch asked; a bit confused.

I see what you did there..... :rainbowlaugh::ajbemused:
Great chapter! Didn't catch any spelling errors or anything...maybe a bit more detail/slower pacing? Dunno, seemed...a bit fast/choppy at points?
Meh. It was a good chapter regardless! :moustache:

2521504
I had to use the "Doctor Who" line......I was writing it and all of a sudden I was like, "Oh my god that is so corny, I must use it.":twilightblush:

Sketch will be destroyed by mom NOOOOOOOOOOOO

Being awhile since i checked back on this Fan-fic, but i'm reading chapter 2 and i like the way you described Ponyville, A lot of detail was put in, almost too much, but i also liked the way that Lyra wasn't in every chapter like every romance Fan-fic, i'm gonna read the rest of the chapters but for now it's 8/10 Big Macs:eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup:

Kudos on the date scene, The Relationship seemed to fit the two perfectly, Awaiting your next chapter but this chapter gets 9/10 Big Macs :eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup::eeyup:

2636957
Chapter 5 is at the proofreaders as we speak, it should be done in the next few days! I'm glad you're liking the story so far :twilightsmile:

Chapter 5 should be done very soon :pinkiehappy:

Chapters 6-7 will be submitted together for.....well you will all see. Just expect it to take a bit longer than normal to get chapters up for a while after this next one.

Chapter 5 is up and chapters 6-7 are being proofread :yay:
So excited to get another chapter up!:yay:

:pinkiehappy:

Surprised this story doesn't have more positive attention. (probably because it's not a lyra/bonbon fic....sigh. I like straight lyra anyhow.)
You and your cliffhangers.....

I can't wait for chapters 6 and 7 to go up, this has to be my favourite fanfic

2658378 Wow:twilightblush:
I'm glad you like it so much :twilightsmile:

Confrontation

*tingles*

2664200 Lots more of that on the way my friend. :moustache:

The next chapters are coming soon....hopefully. I have not abandoned the story and I will finish it!!!!!

I felt like it had been way to long since i put up a chapter, i was originally going to upload chapters 6-7 together, but decided against it as it has been ages since i uploaded anything...so yeah...i hope you guys like chapter 6! :pinkiehappy:

So. Much. Adorableness!
And awesomeness, but mostly adorable! :pinkiehappy:

2849321>>2852164 and here I thought everyone would be getting upset where I had placed that whole scene. Guess you guys liked this one then XD

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