Darkdemonlucifer
Joined 7th Nov, 2017 ·
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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"I wonder..."
<checks an old story>
"Oh hey it's this guy... wait, I ..."
*checks front page. Confirms it's the story*
Oh cool, has TF in it.
*Sees Mercury Shine*
HMMM. THIS WORLD WE LIVE IN IS VERY SMALL AND CONTAINS MANY COINCIDENCES.
In any case, it's a very interesting story, and it was rather enjoyable, with a creative way of having them be changed, with a rather foreboding ending.
Edit: Hey, someone gave me a thumbs-down. Congrats! You are, as per the state of Rhode Island, Very Special and deserve a gold star. :D
11354780
I've worked with Mercury Shine in the past. They're a fantastic customer to work with. Also I don't know who keeps downvoting my stuff, but it seems to be related to the kinks and not the writing as I get downvotes before I get views normally.
If anyone has any genuine complaints about the writing or wants to tell me I suck, they should do so with a constructive comment. I can't fix writing issues if I don't know what they are.
Anyway I'm glad you enjoyed the story and I hope you will enjoy my future content as well!
11355161
Nah, they're not going to because they're not the brightest light bulb in the stack, otherwise they'd be able to create a reasoning or be able to propose a statement of opposition. Or, they just don't like the fic.
What I can't excuse are people down voting comments that have nothing to do with them aside from "thum down funee hur hur."
Edit: Yeah, I'm friends with them actually. Say hi to them for me!
11355161
How have you written 50 stories and not given up on that. People downvote fuck'em... literally.
This was fun,
I'm downvoting because this is just lazy fetish stuff I've seen 10,000 times before on Furaffinity and Ekas, back when those were places worth commenting on. The narrative descriptiveness alters between obsessive, typical fetishist purple prose, when focused on the sexual aspects, and rather dull droning when dealing with everything else. The tone overall is flat, unexpressive. It feels like it's simply going through the motions of a fetish fic, ticking off the boxes with no real emotional investment in anything.
And then there is the grammar. There are DOZENS of errors, some so jarring it makes the sentences difficult to interpret.
11369301
Ey, fair enough. I do have a lot of emotional investment in buildings and structures, because I've actually worked in the construction industry before and it's something I'm passionate about. I can see how it might sound boring however. I actually spent an extra thousand words just on that.
As for the grammar, this is something I am taking writing classes for at the moment, as I am not happy I am providing the quality expected of me in this regard. Already I have learned the difference between their and there, which drove me mad during the production of this story.
Thank you very much for the comment, hopefully I can improve in future.
We need more similar like this (even if i dont like soul vore 100%) , since this is so unique with the wax tf (maybe a Sequel, where a small group got into the mansion before getting themselved transformed by Mercury)
Also it reminded me of a PnP Tales of Equestria idea for a villian/end boss, which would be a (evil) unicorn mare, that controlls wax and making mindless wax golems/warriors out of other ponys, where their souls would be binded on magical candle. If the wax golems got destroyed or the candle goes out, the pony/soul will be lost forever, so the adventures should need to find a safe way to knock the golems out and the boss.
(I was inspired by the PnP tale "The curse of the Statuettes)
11620187
Thank you very much for the encouragement and kind words. The idea was that the mansion itself isn't evil, it's just there and creatures keep breaking into it. Past a certain point the mansion has to defend itself, because it's not right to break in and damage stuff.
I'd love to do a further expansion upon this idea, but the next story I really need to focus on is A Day In The Life Of Twilight The Slave, as that hasn't had an update in years due to worrying about getting the next part perfect. Once that is done I'm going to write up another part to this.
11620316
no problem and i see, it has the rights to do it (besides what would happen, if something like a thoughtless timberwolf etc. would wander into it for shelter?)
Wish you the best for it and not to put to much pressure on you, hope it will come in the future.