Alicorn Malign, an up and coming heavy metal band from Manehattan, is stuck in Ponyville for a week after a family of manticores wrecks the train tracks. For two of the members, Ponyville holds a lot of memories, and not all of them are pleasant.
Rated T for slightly suggestive situations and language, obscure and semi-obscure song and band references, and explicit use of pony puns in metal bands.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
In light of a recent Season 3 episode, I'm rewriting this entire story to improve the continuity whilst editing it. I apologize for any disappointment this may cause, but I promise it will be worth it in the end.
Thanks!! Comments and constructive critique are welcomed!
Chapters (6)
Cool! The rewrite is up!
Just two questions:
1. What color coat is the spiky-maned Earth stallion (Strings)?
2. Is Trixie still the singer?
I anxiously await the next chapter.
1811798
Blast it. Good catch, Frankie. Just corrected it.
I'm watching this, albeit guarded. I liked the direction before, my hopes? This is as good as it was. I'll keep watch, but I'm ill amused. It was good once, here's hoping it's good again.
1812170
I will do my best to make sure this is as good, if not better, than it was before.
1812395
I count on it. I liked what I read, I was quite disappointed when it stopped updating, glad you're back and on the grind again. Here's hoping and to the best!
Whoa! That ending was unexpected. I wonder what happened. Can hardly wait to see the band's reaction to what Trixie's did on her last visit to Ponyville. I eagerly await the next chapter.
1817875
You were the one who liked the "twists and turns".
I love how you incorporated 'Magic Duel' into this story. I look forward to seeing what happend next with everypony. Excellent work so far.
Okay! Definitely better than last time. I think you described the characters a bit fast, however. I would, instead of a block of description, do it something like this.
A (color) (race) was (verbing) while a (gender) (race) was (verbing) <insert dialogue>
To introduce two charries. Mix it up a bit more, though. And, once I get school done with for the semester, I'll be up as a full editor. Grammar and punctuation, awkward wording, etc.
1823111
Thanks
I shall do my best. I'll look over the previous chapters and see where I can work on the descriptions. Maybe you can give a few examples to me in private so I can know where to start looking.
In hindsight, I think The Magic Duel wrecking what I originally had for the story was a blessing in disguise.
Love this story. It's got a lot of personality, and the retconning for the band's relationship to the mane 6 isn't obnoxious as it is wont to be. I can't wait for the next chapter, honestly.
I can imagine. It amazes me how some authors can pull it off, though.
In any case, I loved this chapter. I can hardly wait for the next. Are we going to see Thunderwing and Fluttershy have that discussion we know they must have? After helping Trixie, of course.
Yes. Very enlightening. So Thunderwing x Rainbow Dash? Cool! I really hope Thunderwing and Fluttershy are able to talk. They both really need it. I was surprised Luna didn't show up while Cacophony and Twilight were talking in front of Nightmare Moon's statue. I wonder what the rest of the Apple clan will think of 'Strings'?
Anyway, have a Happy Hearth's Warming Eve and Day to you and yours!
great story mate
YEAH!this chaptchers ALRIGHT!
well this chaptcher was awesome are we gonna see any songs by the band
1850652
That's actually on my 'to-do' list once I get a recording set-up. It'll take some time and money, neither of which I have much of at the moment, but yes, I have plans to make the music of Alicorn Malign real.
And of course, once that's set up, it'll take more time to make the music and make it awesome.
1850657 i was just thinking about you writing some lyrics and putting them in the fic. but actual songs?or are you just shitting me.but if yiu actually do make a few songs than good luck mate.here have a few songs you might or might not like
1850695
I'm dead serious. I plan on writing full fledged songs for Alicorn Malign, although help would be most welcome.
The following bands would be the sound I'd be going for:
1850712 They style would fit.Not exactly my cup of tea since im more in the alternative metal and grunge crowds.I like ti listen to theese kind of songs once in a while
.well once again i wish you luck and hope you will archive you're dream
FUCK YEAH MORBID ANGEL \,,/ Finally some good metal in a story. Here a present from me to you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYeG-rTPaVo
Oh haha! Dude. This already deserves to be on EqD. Those previewers are idiots. But seriously, this is really good.
On a second note-
I caught that shed.mov reference XD
Oh then who is Thunderwing gonna be shipped wih then? dats intrestin.
1851594
Thanks! That was pretty awesome
Surprised you haven't mentioned Mercyful Fate.
1855114
STAY OUTTA MY SHED!!!!!!!!!