Sweet Bitter Songs (OLD)

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The sirens have found interest in a local farmer, putting together a plan to make her one of them... things don't go as planned for them.

This is mostly a story I made for fun, I hope thats alright!

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Comments ( 3 )

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Rune Soldier Dan

Rune Soldier Dan #1 · Oct 31st, 2021 · · ·

An interesting Halloween story. Having the sirens be evil, but not 100% evil, and mocking while still somewhat empathetic, was a nice touch. It made for a fun hook, as I legitimately didn't know what their angle was. Adagio's empathy stood as a compelling contrast with their semi-sinister intent.

Proofreading after posting the story into Fimfic but before publishing might be helpful, you have a lot of paragraphs that don't have consistent spacing between them and some inappropriate capitalization. Regarding the story itself, it felt a little off-putting to have threads that were never tied (Like the mysterious "C" and 2/6 of the Rainbooms having apparently tried to kill Applejack, good god), but it works if we just think of this as a spooky lil' ghost story that doesn't need big explanations.

Regardless, good job, this was an interesting read (though I am biased, being a lover of EQG AJ ).

CreativeCreatures

CreativeCreatures #2 · Oct 31st, 2021 · · ·

11034332

I will keep working on the proof reading, also the mysterious C and the rainbooms will be further explained in another story I plan to submit. so keep your eyes out.

thanks for reading!

Edguy0009

Edguy0009 #3 · Sep 16th, 2022 · · ·

I so want to see what happens next.

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