Episke Afire
Joined 13th Mar, 2013 ·
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That was seriously good. I hope this gets continues it would be a really interesting take on HIE. I noticed you posted English wasn't your first language in your other story you definently have a solid grasp of it now. Definently liked, followed, and looking forward to more!
This story was very good, and I also hope you (the author) will write more of it. As for your English, it is very good. There are many native English speakers and writers that cannot write English as well as you have here. There are a few phrases that are a bit awkward, but they do not ruin the story at all.
10333319
Thank you for your kind words, I'm not really sure about a sequel about Adam's story or even Thorax, but I could try.
10333424
Thanks for your compliment, but I know that I can do better.
10333813
Remember, just because you feel you can do better does not mean you didn't do a good job.
Just finished reading your story, and I thought I'd drop a line.
I really liked it, you did a good job of keeping the tone and tension going without losing the pacing of the story. Adam's mystery builds as the changeling learns more, leading up to that revelation about Adam.
I'll have to keep an eye out for your future stories.
10333989
Glad you liked my story, I'm not sure if I can make more stories on the future, but hey, this story was created by a whim, so you never know.
From earlier comments, I saw that English is not your first language. I will still give some criticism though, the grammar was good most of the time but there were some points where you could still understand what was happening even with the general grammar being strange. Another thing I noticed was on pretty much every part of the story where you had the word 'on' needed to be 'in' instead. Story-wise though, I liked it. One thing I would suggest for something like this if you don't have it is Grammarly. Amazing, helps me a lot with my hard to notice mistakes in typing. In general though, besides the grammar stuff, good story. 👍
Ok, never mind about the Grammarly thing, I finally got to the authors note at the end XD
10338375
But for only 16.99 dollars per month you can have the premium version were experts will review everything that you write and they will be your editors in real time, judging you every time that you screw up, SUBSCRIBE NOW!!
Seriously, if I could live by only writing that wouldn't be that bad. But I don't trust my creativity with my bills.
10338375
Should I set it at the beginning of the story?
10338399
maybe, I don't know XD
great story