• Member Since 2nd Jan, 2019
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Alicia Van Hammer


Lore-keeper for The Discordian Temple. Nonsense Non-servium. Ave Discord.

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Dude McSmirky, Stallion in the Streets with all the news that's fit to peruse for the colts, fillies and mares out there is on the scene, live, loud, lean and green and he's getting the scoop on the LGBTQ scene! With a live and Fiercer than Faust series of candid interviews with the ponies at Ponyville's annual PRIDE Parade! First up, excuse me, miss... ? "Oh. Hello. Uhm... Octavia. Octavia Philharmonica... this is my... er... "

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 21 )
Comment posted by Reichtangle deleted June 21st

Well, I first thought that this was going to be a silly romp, but then it was genuinely touching. I love it! I can't imagine why it doesn't have more votes.

Not bad, kinda wholesome

Fetch #4 · June 19th · · ·

Why is it labeled Incomplete?

10292533
Bruh. I don’t even know if the author is serious or not because it reads like they wrote it in ten minutes while eating Cheerios.

A very lovely first chapter, although personally I'd recommend perhaps a rewrite, perhaps toning down the hamminess of the reporter and some of the infodumping. I get you're trying to make the reporter sound excited and energetic but it comes more across as being unintentionally obnoxious. Also in a rewrite perhaps splitting this forst chapter into a couple more so it processes better. Other than that it's a great fic! shame that more downvotes are likely to be simply be lgbtqia-phobes than actual critics

Okay, I’ll follow the way of the author and show you where you can improve on this piece. As I don’t believe in the dislike, I’ll go through the story and offer some criticism. But before we can even get to the story we need to talk about the title and description. First of all, the title is very bizarre and very troll fic like, as with the description. I can easily imagine people turning away just from this. Also you seem to have no problem with this judging by your other stories, which is odd.

As for the story there’s no hook. It starts with a crashing of symbols and ends with it. Theirs no plot at all either. And if there is it’s certainly not interesting. I would personally love to see Octavias struggle and all, but here it just came of as cheap for me. Perhaps make that a story? It seems that you created an event for the story and not a story for the event.

Another very troll thing about this is the fact that all nearly characters come off as extremely obnoxious and act as if they are on crack cocain. This whole pride parade, while I’m sure valiant in real life, comes of as an extremely unhealthy obsession with the self.

That’s really it.

Edit: I gave a like for support :3

I love this they stick up for what they believe in great job

Comment posted by Krowthepony deleted June 21st

10292533
I agree with u it was awesome

Comment posted by Reichtangle deleted June 21st
Comment posted by Reichtangle deleted June 21st

10294643
Question do u know how hard it is to come out to ppl u love I love the story the way it's cuz I had that struggle when I first came out as bisexual in 2010 put me through a lot I had to put up with depression cuz of it so I hid my true self for 7 long miserable years and I finally came out the second time I am proud I did I have ppl who love me for me I am bisexual and proud

Comment posted by Reichtangle deleted June 21st

10293173
Thank you for the legit criticism. Seeing the amount of vitriol this fiction received was disheartening for both myself and my wife, in particular. Concern-trolling masquerading as critique is pretty foul and I've already had to block a few ugly individuals.
I was wondering how people would take "The Dude". I did want that kind of over-the-top D.J. feel we used to get in the 70's, starting with Sesame Street's "Guy Smiley, roving reporter" adding a little "WKRP Dr Johnny Fever", some "Kingston Falls Rockin' Ricky" and dialing it up to eleven. I know my manner of writing voices as I hear them in my head comes off as irksome to some, like my southern drawl for the Apple clan. Thank you again for your candour. I'll definitely be taking it into account in the next installment.

10293044
Truthfully, I may not fully understand what the tag means. I'm still a bit new to the site, admittedly. I took "incomplete" as meaning that there were still future chapters to be written and posted?

10294650
Thank you for the support, love. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.
I'm sorry people forced you through those experiences. Coming out and living honestly still seems to be a hard scene for WAY too many people in this world. With the efforts of compassionate, brave people with fierce hearts things have gotten better and I believe that as long as we never give up, they will continue to get better- for ALL of us. We will have a world that doesn't need a Pride Parade one day because EVERY day will be one- one we'll ALL want to hit up for the love and fun.
Congratulations and Big Love to you for finally being able to live your truth. It looks like you're doing all right, standing tall and swinging back against voices of intolerance. Right on! <3

10295837
Yes, that is what it means.
I ask because you put -fin- at the end.
-fin- means Finished. End of story. There is no more.

10293086
She is serious and there's no need to be insulting people or their work. Please find somewhere else to unpleasant and antagonistic.

Dude Mcsmirky is quite lovable to me. I'm big on hammy bombastic folks. *smiles* The moment shared between Twilight and Octavia so wonderfully sweet, too. They are a delightful couple.

Seeing somepony claim that pride parades come across as "an extremely unhealthy obsession with the self" is stunningly insincere when that pony is part of a "humans are superior" group and has a nazi-themed username. They also fail to grasp that not only is that not the point of pride parades, but also that being lgbt doesn't define *who* someone is. It's as much the "self" as is the color of one's eyes. It does not define their character.

We always need more pride, more love. More beauty, more kindness. Drown out the hollering bigots with sunshine and laughter. You rock! <3

10360954
this is an epic bruh moment

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