• Member Since 13th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 25th, 2019



Vinyl and Octavia are two mares, both eighteen. They have been on the run for four years.

Music was banned by the princesses long ago for its effect on ponies' emotions. Anypony even thought to know how to play a note was taken away, never heard from again. From this a prejudice was born; those with bright, colorful eyes were musicians. Vinyl and Octavia both must hide themselves and never stay in the same place for too long, less their eyes betray their interest for music and rhythm. These two have been searching for a place to call home everyday of their four-year journey. But what will they do if salvation is suddenly offered to them?

Picture by the talented Bunnimation

(First story on Fimfiction, criticism welcome!)

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 49 )

Main thing so far is, I like the concept. The only downside, I can't imagine what it would be like to live in a society without music, but what I do know is it would drive me into a murderous rage. The downside is the horror of the world you've set up, which really isn't much of a downside! So, :yay:! I hope there's more, which is good, because the chapter didn't end in any of the ways that suggest a Oneshot.
You can skip all of that, and read this: I like it!:pinkiehappy:

Well, I don't know. Very well written, but the idea itself is fairly unrealistic. Equestrian society is based mostly upon music. I'll see where this goes; I like your style :twilightsmile:

An unusual concept but I'm willing to give it a shot and see where it goes :yay:
So I'll be tracking this and awaiting the next chapter :rainbowdetermined2:

590898 I don't know. I would kill others, but I doubt I'd ever kill myself, unless I was bringing others with me. I'd like to say I'd initiate Project September, based on Living Tombstone's song, but I suppose if there were no music, I'd have no inspiration for that. And none of the other Projects would work either. Cupcakes, Factory, Telepath, Rubidium, all out, too small-scale. So... I need a new (theoretical, most likely a reference) project for causing mass destruction.:pinkiecrazy:
Wait, did I just write all that? I've said too much...:trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:

Should be fun to see where this goes :pinkiehappy:
OC is on its way :twilightsmile:

A fun read but you need to correct some spelling errors. :twilightsmile:


What? Where??
TELL ME!! #grammarnazi

Well I don't usually do this but since I like this story I'll reread it and pick them out

Edit : Sent a pm with the corrections :twilightsmile:

Great job on this chapter. Loved the lyrics :yay:

Very nice indeed. Can't wait to see what the next lot of chapters are like :) :pinkiehappy::yay::twilightsmile::raritywink::ajsmug::rainbowlaugh::moustache:

Hooray!:yay: Awesome!:pinkiehappy: Spectacular! Uh, :raritystarry: Positive Descriptive Adjective! :derpyderp1:

I read the whole thing along with the music, and I have to say, it fit perfectly. I really enjoyed this chapter-with-music. :pinkiehappy:

Very lovely :) Keep it up :twilightsmile:

It's not sappy at all! It's bucking adorable and I love reading about such a cute couple. :heart:I'll be waiting (im)patiently for the next chapter :scootangel:

In other stories (and watching MLP) I would never say this, but Celestia can suck it!

I don't know what to say... truly amazing...

Interesting, I might just consider sending in my own.
Though for the most part, I am gonna have to modify him to suit the story.

First off typos:
strait = straight
foreword = forward
weather = whether
your a DJ = you're

Since that's out of the way:
Of course it was very entertaining as usual and I have to admit it was a really cool twist to have Vinyl interacting with a version of herself from the past! (I love the 'second-first DJ' title too! :rainbowdetermined2:)
And it was so cute to imagine her and Tavi singing along to the song. :rainbowkiss:
I'm not as interested in the earlier part except the action scene which was very nicely done.
(I'm not amazing at writing any kind of battle scene myself but luckily I don't have to write many in my works :raritywink:)

Keep it up! You better not stop now! :pinkiehappy:


Thank you, even spell check misses stuff sometimes!

Not quite, but yeah, that's the basic premise.

:yay::yay: Tavi x Vinyl FTW! :yay::yay:

I'm always gonna try to do an OC section, if for any reason to give the reader a taste of what's happening outside the Rhythm Underground. And it's really hard to write fighting stuff while keeping it E for Everyone... To me, it always gets a bit repetitive.

And no chance on this stopping any time soon! Heck, this is probably gonna go on...

... I am speechless, not only did you show me a new great song but you also made some fantastic lyrics for it(I tried singing along but I failed miserably xD). Curse my voice cracks!

This went along nicely(the song and all) but I had a hard time finding the timing for when they sang and the song's rhythm but lovely none the less. I'll just try to sing along this time xD
One of my favorites so far and it's interesting but I have 5 chapters ahead of me so... Back to reading for me!

How perfect, now I can practice singing this for fun :D

If this is gonna go on forever then I'll be forever happy

Yush! Love what you did with Ikuze :twilightsmile:

You make me wait so long for such a short chapter!?!? And now you make me wait another month?!?! You win with the super chapter... I hate and love you so much I RAGE!!! :pinkiehappy: :flutterrage:

I'll also say why would you make such a short (but awesome as usual) chapter and then drop the bomb on me that I have to wait a whole month for the next bit. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_cry.png
Ah well :moustache:
Best of luck on your writing competition entry! I'll look forward to read that as well :twilightsmile:

Aye, thanks for the cameo mate! I certainly appreciate it.
Now here we have Luna dancing a happy jig!

The concept, idea of this story is pretty good. Well written, and most importantly - original.
It is quite strange that this 'story' doesn't have more likes. Because it does deserve more of them.

Why you no update? :raritydespair:

I actually expected some kind of musical.

Why do I feel like this is sort of a parody of Fahrenheit 451

Definitely a read when I have time!

3360652 fahrenheit 451, gathering blue and the giver also kinda have an influence from what i see but the most obvious one is the chrysalids in my view.

great song lyrics. i would have liked to listen to the music as well but the account has been deleted or it has according to youtube ... would you be able to say what the song is? if not, don't worry.

... thanks. dont worry about the last comment by me then ...

Is going to be an explanation about why the once benevolent Celestia and Luna decided to pull a 1984 on Equestria?


Well I have read Giver and fahrenheit 451, so... yeah =P

Very good, very very good. I am fully enjoying this story.
I look forward to furthe chapters. Keep up the good work.

I like the story and can't get enough of it! But a couple of things bother me and the fact that they were constant. First, Octavia has a grey coat, not brown. And second, his name is spelled Macintosh. Other than that I saw 1, maybe 2 spelling errors. But I loved it and need more! :twilightsmile:

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