• Member Since 12th Feb, 2018
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

Mindrop


Author, Historian, Living History Enthusiast, Fallout Fan. If I don't know it, I will find out. Check out my Patreon under the same name!

Sequels2

Comments ( 50 )

Keep it going its a good book (im running out of books to read)

8913845
I hate it when I do that. Thanks! And I am glad you are enjoying it. I have written and edited things well ahead of their release dates. A notice if you didn't catch it. I will be releasing Book 2 as a new published book. To help the readers keep track.

That was incredibly short but funny

"Back red green blue yellow sir!" one of these things is not like the other

8928192
I always love weather day.

it said he spent 2 hours in the twister and that entire time he didnt find cardinal???? Is it me or is he blind shes a red and orange figure if you cant see that in a twister your blind

8930059
I always pictured him lower inside than she was. And the speed of the twister isn't like what we have even seen here on earth. So a lot more is happening and making it hard to see. Plus, light doesn't filter in through the clouds.

As to color, most of her is covered in a dark green flight suit. Tail is exposed and so is most of her head and mane. She isn't a flying fireball of color.

Well if the twister is fallowing how air currents work than they should of either both been shot up and out or met in the middle or top

8930217
Well, I guess I made an error in judgement there and need to learn how air flows better. Shadow's armor would weigh him down more. And they are trying to get out, not find each other. Its dark and they both are in dark gear. That's my rational. lol

If the wind is strong enough to make a barrier dont you think it would spit him out like a cannon? Tornadoes in real life cant make a barrier even f5 and f5 can rip buildings from foundations

8930405
I guess I really need to work on my wind dynamics in further research. lol. I don't touch anymore twisters in the series.

That would be a good idea also the wind inside the twister would be faster than the outside sinces there less space to move so it would be moving faster think planets and how close they are to the sun

I ran out of another book it was 187k and i finished it in 2 days.

Huzza i found another one which will last about 2 days

8932139
Well, I am all lined up for Tuesday releases, every evening! So I hope you don't get too involved in other works. Total written is at just under 500k words and 1700 pages. You will have plenty to read, slowly. I am behind on my editing.

Ill run out of books before anything els

In my favorite section alone had around 32 books with around 11million words read

8932294
I need to pick up some of my books again and read. I have at least that load in hard books sitting on my shelf. Let alone online.

8930405
In response to aerodynamics and twisters; refer to, at the very least, Season 2 Episode 22 (Hurricane Fluttershy). Twisters do work differently, and based on that, they were not getting spit out. I knew I was pulling the idea from somewhere in Season 1 or 2, as they are cannon. I stand on my books use of the twister. lol. Not that it really matters or is of great importance.

Also, if you haven't checked out the wiki page for the story, the link is in the description. I love the last, behind the scenes part. I put a lot of fun stuff hidden in the chapters.

Hippity hoppity a chapter is on the property

8941522
As promised, Tuesday Evening!

If the main OCs in this story were voiced, what would they sound like?

9007581
Tough question.
Shadow Flare: A higher pitch voice that is androgynous. The voice I hear in my head is not correct. Unlike a male teen who's voice is changing, Shadow Flare's voice never cracks.
Cardinal Spitfire: An aggressive Rarity. Joyful, but always with an edge of sass. Listening to Lightning Dust speak might help.
Marble Falls: Spitfire.
Deke: Mid range that carries swagger and confidence. He doesn't say anything lightly, not is his voice.
Olive Pit: I don't have a voice for Olive Pit in my head. An assertive Male Fluttershy would be a good example. He is kind, but firmer than she is.

I hope those cover the ones you were wondering about.

9007599
Is this for just this story? Because I was talking about the entire series.

9128699
This is for all 4 books and the Anthology. The series is broken up in a way to make it easier to handle, just like if you were reading a series you purchased in hard copy. Its one big story arc, just different books for readability. So, if the character is in the other books, that is how they sound. Shadow's story, and the others, continues throughout the other three books. With more specifics in the Anthology, like Golden Dawn's beginning.

The was listing through my collection again and found this song. Honestly it could be the them song of the entire first book https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HgzGwKwLmgM it fits near perfectly with the story

9304764
Wow. I have heard that song a few times. Yeah, that is a good one. I just finished updating all of Book 1 from edits. I Think I will add it to the long description. Because its fun!

I am impressed. It is a realy great story. I will definitly read all other books of this. But I have to say there are many errors and there are often two of the same word written in a row. This happens a lot. Nevertheless it is a great book!
But i need help: Should i start now with Book2 or Anthologies?

9517998
Dang it! I've worked to eliminate those. I'll have to go back in and edit it again. Either way it's up to you. The Anthology runs alongside the main books and offers insight into thing. There is a lot I can't put in the book like those stories, so I developed the Anthology for that. So I would do that first. Like you get to know Golden Dawn's background, and meet Derecho. Also Marble Falls mission below. Not necessary, but a whole lot of fun. It might give you a grip on some of the characters for the continued reading in book 2 and definitely book three, where Derecho comes out to play.

9518160
Thank you for your information ^^

I hope i didnt cause to much stress about looking for errors(if so than Im sorry). It is not like it makes a bad story. Its just little things i noticed (and kinda because I am a perfectionist XD). But anyway thanks for the info and for the great book of course! :D

9518591
No worries at all. I know I need to slip back in and read it. It's been a while and I don't have an editor, so I do my best.

9518818
Mmh.... it is difficult to do all the work alone. You have my respect on that. I would like to help you but i got no time either because of school XD

Nevertheless I good luck with future projects ^^

9520150
Thanks. Any feedback is appreciated! Really appreciated!

Hello Mindrop.

I see a few problems with your story. Things like dropping a period when using quoted texts, like: "He said loudly"... when it should be: "He said loudly." Also, I see where you did not use a sentence structure checking editor, if you used one at all. Using 'to' instead of 'too', and dropping the 'y' when trying to say 'they', which turns out as 'the'.

Checking for such errors is a time consuming job, but one that an Author absolutely needs to do. Such errors stand out from the text and break the reader's flow as they follow along the story line. Such breaks in the flow of the story keep the reader from becoming fully immersed in the plot.

If you do not wish to spend the time to make such corrections, you should find someone to do it for you. This, is what an Editor is for... at least at the basic level. An Editor also will go over a story and snip sections of text that ramble. Or re-write whole paragraphs to make them easier to read. They also take the long view of things. Looking over a completed text as a unit, as well as subjecting every word and phrase used to near microscopic evaluation. Some Authors absolutely HATE Editors. But, few are the tales that cannot be improved by passing through an Editor's hands.

I know this for a fact, both as an Author myself (not of pony fiction), and as an Editor. I once hired a gal in college to write up a 20 page story, for which I paid her. She would write up to a page or two at a time and email it to me. I would make suggestions, and point out errors, as well as fill in more detailed information as to the background the story was set in to aid her understanding of just why I felt things should be a certain way. Once she had completed the story, She sent me the final take and I sat down and spent the better part of 3 weeks going over those 20 pages. When I was done, the story had grown to 24 pages of text, and I had corrected paragraph sizes, contextualization, spelling, word usage, etc. I then email her a copy of my 'corrections'.

Over the years to follow, I hired her to write 2 more stories using the same characters. Once again, swapping story parts and suggestions, until the stories were complete and turned into me for editing. I edited them and sent copies of each to the writer, even though I 'owned' the stories. She liked my edited versions better than her own, and uses the 3 edited versions on her web site as examples of her work. Yes, she does give me credit for the background world, world details, characters and their traits, and most of all, my editing work.

So, I can say with some authority, that what your tales need is some serious editing. Either by yourself, or by someone with 'fresh' eyes to catch those little errors that break a reader's attention to the tale being told.

Just some thoughts,
the Frank Pony

P.S. Do NOT take the above as criticism. i meant it for constructive use to point out things to make you a better Author. Editing takes time, lots of it, and attention to details that an Author isn't paying attention to as they write. An Editor takes the time and ignores the story told, to look at the fine detail. Things like seeing a sentence being too long and breaking it up, or correcting things by adding periods, commas, colons and semi-colons, etc. A good Editor also will look at how a sentence is structured and perhaps find a better way of saying something the Author means to say, but letting it 'flow' better for the Reader's appreciation and understanding of what's going on and why in the story.

Once again, just my thoughts,
the Frank Pony

Thanks for the input. I welcome the constructive criticism that makes me a better writer.

I will have to dive back in. I first published these chapters by the end of May 2018. Since then, I republished. Every single one after a full shakedown. I want an editor, but can't find one. I can't afford to pay anyone. I have pour at least 32 hours over Each chapter over the span of months to catch these mistakes. I'll run another set of edits soon. I certainly do set the chapters aside for a good few weeks to months before editing them for the final run, to prevent me reading ahead and knowing what I mean to say. I am giving this story every ounce of love I have.

All in all, I do hope that you enjoyed the story and will continue to read it.

Hopefully someone will take the time to read through what i've got cooking once its submitted i'll just say that right now my book is planned to be very graphic and sad but with alot of action its called Soldier Of The Wasteland and it's split up into 2 books here's my summary for the first part

Frozen Snow Blast has no one but himself to rely on his parent's murdered by the Raider's and enclave after a vicious attack on his hometown with nothing but his gear some clothes and a few med-kit’s he flees the city in hope's of finding someone to help him get revenge on the ponies that ruined his life its a battle of survival as one pony rises to lead a resistance and wage war on the gang's that destroyed everything he held dear.

9563734
I've started reading ur Shaping Shadow book's im quite intrigued man keep up the awesome work hope u will take the time to have a look at my stories once they're finished and ready for submission:twilightsmile:😃

9803142
Well, I am following you now, so I'll see the release.

I'm glad you enjoyed the first book. The writing only gets better. It all gets better. I'm still in the process of releasing Book 4: Below. I'll actually be releasong a chapter tonight. I've not missed a week basically since I start releasing Shaping Shadow when it was first published in February 2018. I'm glad you

I look forward to hearing more form you as you read through Shadow's journey!

9803168
Awesome i appreciate that man i will send u a little sneak peak of what i've been working on i myself am doing my best to increase my writing skill's each day and to make some decent steady progress.

Besides not adding the earth pony traits to the alicorns, this is good so far. Xd

9807294
Thanks! I am glad you enjoyed it. It only gets better. I'm currently releasing Book 4.

Rainbow Dash, the wielder of the Element of Loyalty turner her back on the Pegasus Race when the Grand Pegasus Enclave rose up to protect it. She left, abandoning us. Fluttershy too was gone. So the founders did what the had to do to protect our forefathers and us today. The counsel is, mostly, a great system of government.

Turner

“Sounds like it isn't an easy of a job,” Shadow replied.

Easy of a job

“And it probably would raise how the family is viewed,” Early Blossom added. “Highly respected for a reason, but the foals are starting splitting that reputation apart. One of those splits becoming a Enclave Soldier, protecting the Pegasus Race; well it would do wonders for you when you get leave and come home, as well as for the family.”

As annoying As the last line is it’s not grammarly incorrect

“Back, Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, Sir!” Somepony at the front responded.

It’s still not like the others!

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