Episode 4: Me, Myself, and Crying
Just_another_guy’s Comment: The Beard has to be orange too with Bugzes counterpart. Just saying.
GreyRebl’s Comment
As you watch your human counterpart crying on the ground in front of the cheap inn, you can’t help but feel for the guy. Despite being a hideous abomination in the eyes of Celestia, Luna, and all the old gods, he is still a version of you. Even if he’s got long unkempt orange hair, and a stringy orange beard that would look at home in the Equestrian swamp lands, he IS you.
You can almost hear the multiverse laughing at this turn of events.
Another you from an alternative universe, and he's poor, filthy and homeless, the epitome of the dredges and struggles of a life gone wrong. When you look into his eerily familiar eyes, you can see the defeat, the shell of a dying person. Lost. Alone. Facing something like this again... Even when on the run, you can still never outrun yourself.
You lay a hand over your Inventory, feeling it’s comforting texture. Your daughter has one too, an exact copy in fact. A connection, in a sense... Even when separated, you feel that she's still in there, sleeping in her room as always. With an Inventory of her own, Nightshade is bound to have adventures and a life without regret, without all the pain that accompanied yours...
Isn't that right Nightmare Bugze? You mutter, thinking of the last doppelganger you faced.
But even then, he didn't have a future to look forward to. Neither does this one, who's sobbing into the ground. It's stuff like this that you wonder how in Luna’s name you have the luck to turn out better despite your suffering and circumstances. You sigh, rubbing your neck with your knuckles.
Bugze? Selena asks noticing your mood.
I…I can’t stand this Selly. I’ve got to do something, you mutter to her. She lets out a sigh, knowing exactly what thoughts and feelings just went through your head.
If you must, but whatever it is, make sure it’s somewhere where he’ll stop making a scene. You look around, and thankfully, no one is around, though you do hear the night clerk inside still playing with his toys.
Right. Alright other me, let’s get you somewhere quieter. You clear your throat, hoping the crying human hears before you numbly say,
"Stand up.” Your human self minutely glances up, eyes glinting with tears and confusion.
"H-huh?"
"Come on. Crying into the floor is too low, even for me." You hold out a hand, smiling thinly. "Even for you."
He looks dumbly at the hand with a crooked breath. As if to test if it is even real, he prods a shaky finger to your palm. Your hand twitches from the foreign touch, but you keep it still nonetheless. Then, tentatively, he grasps it. His grip is weak...but it's still warm, alive. To you, that's good enough. He looks up at you.
"W-who are you? Really?"
A pause. Then, you pull him up with a smile. "Let’s just go with BST for now."
And you're going to accomplish what you failed to do last time. You're going to save yourself…as soon as he stops whimpering that is. You take the still shaking human into a nearby alleyway, away from possible prying eyes and ears.
“Alright, easy does it buddy,” you lean him up against the wall where he slides down and tears still stream from your eyes. “It’ll be alright, there’s no reason to cry,” you try to comfort, but he just shakes his head.
“The hell there ain’t. A cleaner version of myself going by an old track of mine is trying to make me feel better. This is it. I’ve finally snapped,” he whimpers.
“No, you haven’t snapped dude. You just need to get a hold of yourself,” you encourage.
“How? How do I do that,” he weeps.
“I uh…” you see him place his head in his hands and shudder, although it’s much quieter than it was in front of the inn. “Actually, why don’t you just get it out of your system. I’ll be here when you’re done.”
He seems to shudder more at that, but you give him his space as he cries into his hands, slumped against the wall.
“Just let it out Me. You have all the time in the world.”
30 Minutes Later
I Didn’t Mean That Literally!!! You mentally anguish as your counterpart still hasn’t looked up from his crying fit.
Falx_of_Lume’s Comment
Puzzling Frosts’ Comment
You stand there looking at the crying alternate version of yourself, not knowing what to do.
"Dear Luna, is this what I'm like when I lose it? How do you guys stand being around me?" You ask aloud with a twitching eye.
I don't exactly have a choice about it Sombra deadpans.
To tell you the truth though, you don't really cry as much as shout out loud what you're thinking, usually because you forget you don't have to talk aloud for us to hear you. Selena says.
"He's been crying for half an hour!" You exclaim.
Like right now. She adds. If you keep speaking aloud like that the locals are going to start thinking you're crazy.
"Oh please, there's noling around except Mr. Cries-a-lot and he's not paying any attention to me right now!" You retort.
"*sniff* Who're you talking to?"
"Ah crud." You mutter.
The alternate you is looking up at you with two-halves fear, another half confusion, and a final half sadness.
Four halves equal two, Bugze. Selena groans out with a facehoof.
Well he is the second version of him-
Shut up, Sombra!
"Yeah, shut up Sombra!" You say.
"Huh? Sombra? He's here?" Human Bugze asks glancing around him.
"Shut up me! I'm talking to the voices in my head! Stay out of it!" You snap at him in irritation. He closes his opened mouth with a click of his teeth behind his lips. You facepalm at your dumbness and try to save face.
“Oh wait no, I didn’t mean it like-“
“No, it figures. My hallucinations would be crazy wouldn’t they?...” he says in melancholy.
“I’m not a…” you try to say but he is already looking down again, though this time in sadness. No whimpering in sight.
Ok, maybe I should start thinking. But at least he’s stopped crying. Now what do I say to cheer him up? Any tips Selena?
I honestly don't know my bug. This situation is jarring even for me.
Oh come on! You’re the one who always knows what to say to cheer me up and keep me motivated.
Bugze, I already have a hard time keeping you, Nightshade, and Smokey in here under control.
Hey!
But two of YOU? That's a lot to ask from anypony. Thou two of you when I have my body… Selena mumbles in thought.
Alright, I guess I have to give you tha-wait, what did you-
Nothing!She cuts you off and continues with another thought. Although by the looks of things, he's homeless, so other humans are more than likely to ignore him if he talks. Especially considering talking about "another version of himself having voices in his head" will also make himself look crazy.
Huh? You lost me with that explanation,you bumble.
What I’m saying is that if he is you, he'll likely believe what you tell him so long as it's believable, and he can’t jeopardize us because others will think he’s insane. Selena says.
Oh, OK…Wa-Hey!' You think indignantly.
You believed your Grandfather’s paranoid delusions about machines being evil, she points out.
Because they ARE evil. I’ve just been able to keep my sociopathic tendencies towards them in check lately!
Regardless, whatever you say, make sure it sounds credible. He already thinks you’re a delusion of his, and if you’re dead set on helping him, then you that thought must be rid.
Alright alright.Something believable…You relent, and start to ponder your next words.
“Hey, buddy, are you done moping?”
“Heh, I guess,” he says moodily. “I’m already crazy, so I guess I might as well give up and start speaking to my hallucinations.”
“I’m not a hallucination. I dragged you into this alley way remember?”
“Oh yeah BST?” he counters. “Which by the way, is my least favorite song, if you’re not my complete mental breakdown, then what the hell are ya?”
Okay, time to put my skills of deception to use here. It'll be easy this time. He's not expecting it, and there's absolutely no reason for him to disbelieve me. It's time to deliver with a completely cool head and confident attitude. You inhale.
"I'm you from an alternate dimension inhabited by ponies and other sapient creatures that has magic and other forces at work in it. My best friend is a reformed powerful demigoddess that is stuck inside my mind and I also have another slightly less reformed villain stuck in there as well. We came here in search of ancient relics sent here over a thousand years ago along with some other bad guys in order to find a way to get them out of my head and create bodies of their own for them." You tell the alternate you with a completely serious look.
WHAT THE ABSOLUTE BUCK WAS THAT?! Selena shrieks with panic.
I DON'T KNOW! I WAS UNDER PRESSURE! THE TRUTH JUST SLIPPED OUT! You answer with just as much panic.
THAT TRUTH COULD HAVE BEEN A FLIPPING BOOK!!! HOW DID YOU EVEN SAY THAT WHOLE THING WITH A STRAIGHT FACE AND-SHUT UP SOMBRA!!!!!
AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sombra laughs hysterically.
Oh Crud, Oh Crud. I was supposed to make it sound believable, now there’s no way I can make him take me seri-
“Okay…” your doppelganger says unsure, giving you a weird look. He sits up from the wall and cautiously walks towards you. He holds out a hand and touches your shoulder before pulling it back.
“Alright, I have no idea what you’re smoking, and I still haven’t ruled out the possibility of you being a hallucination…but what you just said sounds like a little girl’s fantasy gone wrong.”
“Oh it’s been anything BUT a fantasy! The world I come from is cutthroat and brutal. The only saving grace is that the folks look a lot better than yours!” you respond indignantly, causing him to raise an eyebrow.
What are you doing? Selena asks.
Well the cat’s already out of the bag, might as well roll with it, you reason.
“Look, I’m not going to lie to you, it’s the truth. I AM you from another dimension. I have a quest, but I can help you out as well.” He shakes his head and looks at the ground, brushing tears off his beard.
“Yeah, sure. You're me huh? I doubt that,” he dismisses.
"I Am! I'll prove it...Uh...." you think of anything you can say to make him believe you.
Kichi’s Comment
“Well, I mean, surely we have some things in common,” you stutter. “Like, uh…our parents died when we were young, and we were raised by Grandbuggy.”
“Grandbuggy?” he asks at the foreign word. “I was raised by my Grandad sure, but anybody who’s listened to my songs knows my folks beefed it when I was a kid.” He shakes his head and spits. “Crazy old fool, I still miss him.”
“Oh, well…” you stammer, “What about Sombra? You heard me talk about him earlier.”
He grunts at that. “Haven’t seen the bastard in years. Not since it all fell apart. Last I heard, he was really into crystals, if you know what I mean.”
“Oh believe me, I know exactly what you mean,” you say, misinterpreting his words.
Crystals are the life blood of everything. My kind are crystals in a sense, he harrumphs.
Don’t care, you respond before speaking aloud again.
“Ok, well what about our daughter? Nightshade?”
“Nightshade?” he asks in confusion. “Buddy, I ain’t got a daughter…Maybe if I hadn’t screwed everything up, things would be different…” he looks down.
Ah, no human Nightshade? You think in disappointment.
Perhaps that is for the best, your counterpart doesn’t appear to be father material, Selena says.
Yeah. Plus I wouldn’t want to look at a version of my daughter and totally be disgusted by her appearance.
Her redesign would be fant-
“NO IT WOULDN’T!” you yell startling your counterpart. “*AHEM* Anyway, what about Nightmare Moon?” you pull out the poster, “I know her very well. Also, what’s Queen of the Hive? Is that this world’s Chrysalis? Because let me tell you, the history I had with her was-“
“AAAAUUUGGHHH!!!” He grunts and grabs the poster out of your hand, crumpling it up in his own. He then kicks a nearby trash can, knocking it over as he starts breathing fast in sadness and anger.
“Whoa, whoa, don’t have a cow, just take it-“
“EVERYTHING WAS FINE UNTIL THAT BITCH….Untill…” he trails off.
"Until...?" you ask tentatively.
"Until that concert... I’d known her back in school, she and I used to be friends, so I gave her a shot and her band opened for us, and it was a great show. Then the after party happened and…” he huffs and scrunches his eyes.
“What happened?” you ask.
“I don’t know. I think Chrysalis put something in my drink because the next thing I remember, she was on the same bed as me, trying to get my clothes off. And then Nimmy…Nimmy walked in…and that Hive slut just started laughing!”
“Oh…” you say in understanding.
“I tried to explain, but she left and cut me out of her life. I have no idea what happened to her, or where she is now…but without her, the band couldn’t exist. Sombra got into his crystals, and I, well…I just spent myself into the ground trying to find some way to make me happy…Trying to find her…And spoiler alert, it didn’t work. I’m just a broke bum, and nobody knows or cares who I am anymore…”
“Oh, jeeze man…” you mutter, not quite knowing what to say. He shakes his head and sniffles his nose.
“Ultimately it was my fault, but still I hate that green haired whore for ruining any future I had with...”
8bitmadness’s Comment
"That's really harsh," You respond. "Somehow this world's Chrysalis seems more evil than mine…although, mine technically killed me…"
“Huh? Killed you?” he asks in confusion.
“Yeah, she caught me giving food to a starving mare, and she killed me for it. She brought me back to, but that initial killing, woof. She may have figuratively torn your heart out that night, but she LITERALLY tore mine out.”
“You’re serious aren’t you?” he asks in awe.
“Yup. I’ve had plenty of other near death experiences too,” you lift up your hoodie and show off the scars that have carried over into your human form, causing the other you to gasp.
“Yeah, it ain’t pretty is it?”
“I was kind of curious why hallucination me had a scar over his eye, but I thought that was just me making you look cool…are…are you really real?” he asks once more. You pause in hesitation noticing that he’s finally looking at you seriously.
Are you sure about this path Bugze? Selena intones.
Sure or not, go with it, this is character development if I've ever seen it, Sombra responds. You swear you can hear the crunching of popcorn.
This isn't your show, Scum! This can have serious real life consequences.
Meh, I really don't care anyways, so long as we don't die. Ignoring the crystal king, you answer Selena’s question as you speak aloud to your doppelganger.
"Yeah… Yeah I’m real. Everything I’ve said before, it's all true. I know it's a bit crazy, but if one of us has gone through worse, it's me, and I came out better for it." You respond.
That's... actually pretty profound. Are you sure you're still the Bugze I know?
"Not only that, But you're not forgotten. Some girl at a fast food place recognized us. You still have fans out there, and I bet you can get out of this rut," You continue, making sure to help your counterpart feel better about himself.
"... You're…You’re right,” he nods. “Hallucination of my broken psyche or not, you’re right. I can’t go on like this. I guess I just have to move on. I haven’t found her in ten years…But I’ll never find her if I’m a worthless bum. I can, and I will get out of this rut!" Your doppelganger responds showing a beaming smile. At least, that's what it would be, had he taken better care of his teeth. “By God, I will get back on top! You hear that world?! Me and my Alternate Universe self are gonna take you down!!!”
“Yeah…let’s keep that kind of talk on the down low. I know the both of us aren’t quite sane, but we kind of gotta hide that a little better,” you implore.
“Oh…right,” he responds.
Okay Bugze, I can tell you're dedicated to this course of action, so I will support you in any way I can.
I won't, but if things get bad, I'll get us out of a bad situation. I have watched every episode of My Little Human after all.
"First things first, we should get you fixed up. If anyone asks, we're long lost twin brothers, separated at birth," You continue, feeling considerably more witty than usual.
“Heh, with Grandad’s reputation, that wouldn’t be too farfetched. God rest his soul….” He says solemnly.
“Well that’s our cue. The first step to fixing you up is getting you happy, and flushing out whatever the heck is in your system. Some food might help, but I only had a few Prench Fries before some fan filly tried to take advantage of me.” He gives you a curious look at that but shrugs.
“Well, I don’t have any money. Kind of spent it all at the bar, till they kicked me out this morning.”
“Don’t worry, I got this,” you say as you pull out several bits from your bag in an awkward manner, still not used to your hands. At least you're getting the hang of them quickly. Your counterpart's jaw immediately drops, and his eyes open as wide as possible.
"Is... Is that gold?" He asks, unable to contain his shock.
"Yeah, why? The burger kid had the same reaction. Is this not the currency here?" You respond with a healthy dose of youthful naiveté.
"No, it's not. Gold is worth a freaking lot!" Your counterpart replies. Even to you it's obvious that he's getting excited.
"You need to keep that hidden until we can exchange it. People would Kill to get that much gold," He continues. You take mental note of this.
"So, are we rich?" You ask cautiously.
“How many coins do you have?” he asks.
“Well I spent four this morning, so 496.”
“Four hundred and…Dude, with this, I don’t have to sleep in this dump tonight, or any night for awhile.”
“Oh…so if I give you these bits, will you be set for life?”
“Well, for awhile at least, but still that’s better than what I’ve had in years!”
Down with Chrysalis’s Comment
Huh...being kind of rich. That's...new
What's the matter? Usually when we come across wealth you start shouting aloud just how rich we are.
As well as saying how he'll buy every last bit of those terrible directors movies and 'cleanse' them with fire.
Ignoring Sombra's comment you answer Selena,
I don't know...usually this is the point when something goes really wrong and we lose all the cash. I feel like if I just don't do anything it won't happen this time.
...
Seriously who are you and what have you done with my bug?
"Oh shut up!" The human you blinks his eyes in confusion at your sudden outburst as he says,
"Are you talking to me or the voices in your head?" You roll your eyes at this before saying,
"The voices in my head B2, obviously." Your human counterpart blinks owlishly before asking,
"B...2? What's that?" You roll your eyes again before saying,
"Well since we both have the same name, I figured I should call you something different to avoid confusion. Since you’re the second me, B2!"
“But my name is @#$%&,” he counters, with your original name.
“Oh…right, in this world you wouldn’t have had Cadence to rename you Bugze.”
“Bugze?” he says suddenly, “I haven’t heard that nickname in…wow, when was the last time I heard that? Who even called me that?” he wonders as he puts a hand to his head in bafflement.
“Well alright then, to avoid confusion, and to make me not have to think about my old name and life, let’s stick with Bugze and B2. Sound good?” You counterpart stares at you as Selena says,
Oh come now Bugze. There's no way the other you would just willing allow you to-
"B2 huh? I like it, has a nice little ring to it, plus it makes me sound like the Bomber Plane!"
...I sometimes forget just how dumb you are my bug. In any world.
The Rutherford’s Comment
"Ok, B2, can we go and get this exchanged now?" you ask holding out your bag of bits.
"Um, well it’s not even noon yet, so the bank should be open.”
"Alright, let's go and do that first, then we’ll get food, then we should go about finding me...um, us jobs. You are looking for a job as well right?" you ask your double.
"Y-yeah." He looks away, a bit downcast. "But who is going to hire a washed up rock star bum like me?” He begins to tear up again. "I am a bu-*SLAP* You slap him before he can get going.
"Oh no, we are not going through this again. We are going to exchange this and then you and I are going shopping. We will get us some more clothes and maybe a mane cut for you, then we will start looking for jobs." You then wrinkle your nose, and realize just how bad he smells.
"But first, why don't you go and take a shower, if you are filthy, they will throw us out of any building before we get a chance to buy anything."
"A-alright, if you think I nee-"
"No thinking, you do! Now where’s the nearest showers?"
“Um…there’s a YMCA a few streets down, but they cost money and-“
“We’re rich now. I don’t know what this Yumkaw is, but you’re getting a wash. After that, we’ll get you stabilized, and in turn, you are going to help me get all the latest technology and find the bodies of ancient giant sea ponies so I can grave rob them of their jewelry! ”
“Huh?” he sputters in confusion.
“I’ll get to that later, but for now, let’s go stinky!”
He nods and then leads you towards the building he indicated. Oddly enough, both of you stumble walk. You because of still learning how to be biped, and him because of alcohol.
Once there, you give him a Bit, and B2 walks off to the showers while you sit down on a bench by the road.
Seriously, who are you and what have you done with my bug? Selena asks suddenly.
"What do you mean?" you ask aloud since noling’s around.
You just took control of that situation and thought with a rationality I thought you would never have.
"Hey! I have my moments. Anyway, while I am having this moment of rationality, what do you think of all this? And do you have any ideas of what kind of jobs we should look for?"
Well that would depend on your skill sets, and on you getting better control of your body.
"I know and I will, and you are right. I doubt catching criminals is viable since I can’t do magic. I know I can do a patch job, and buck apples, but I doubt that they harvest apples like that here," you say looking down at your skiny legs.
They usually either pick them by hand or they use a machine.
"Ugh great, they use machines. Those are evil. EVIL!"
*GONG*Enough Bugze! We are not having that breakdown again. Besides, you said you had a better handle on that.
"The thought of them and humans together drove me over a little! And fine, but that still leaves us with a question? What do we do for a job then?"
8bitmadness’s Comment
PuzzlingFrost’s Comment
Purely by chance, you find a cork board labeled "Job Openings" on the outside of the YMCA.
"Huh, that's really convenient," You mumble to yourself.
You said it. It's kinda creepy how sometimes the exact thing you need is right in front of you the entire time.
"You're right Selena, and it is kinda creepy," you reply. You skim several of the postings, and notice that a large number of them have already been pulled down.
"Let's see, fry cook? Nah. Butler? No, that one requires a three month training course. Stuntman? Not after last time. I’d be dead within the week, and this world’s Applewood would be burnt down as well." Your eye catches a rather new looking one.
“Oh hey here’s one! With no previous experience needed. For fifty dollars a night for five nights, as a security guard! That sounds pretty good. What’s the name of this pllllaaaa…” You read the name of the company posting and your blood runs cold.
Security Guard Wanted for Fazbear’s Fright
“Oh Tartarus the Buck No!” you say, remembering the horrors you went through at the Freddy Fazbear’s in your world.
“I am not dealing with more evil electronic mascots thank you very much...but maybe I should take the address down just in case. I'm assuming buildings still burn the same in this world.”
Agreed. Look at this one, Bugze, a local school is looking for a janitor. Surely that's safer than killer animatronics.
"That could work. I'm good at fixing things, and even if I mess up at the other stuff, I can just fix things up again. And the school is…Crystal Prep Academy?" You rub your eyes and look again, and yes, the school listed is the one you ran away from the day before.
“Hmm, if I was the janitor, I would be able to move around that place without being suspicious, and I’d be able to find this side’s mirror…but then I’d be around Human Twilight and Armor…”
You take your time thinking of the pros and cons of being a janitor at Crystal Prep Academy. Despite the lack of excitement, it should be easy enough, and it's a security net just in case you run out of cash from converting some of your bits, but being around human counterparts of some of your greatest enemy/acquaintances...
"Hey, Bud, you okay there?" comes a familiar voice.
"WhoWhatWhereWhenWhyHow?!" You shriek, turning around to face B2, now much cleaner. His hair and face anyway, his clothes still look and smell funky.
"Oh hey B2, you shower fast," you speak casually.
“I was in the shower for a half hour, and I've been trying to get your attention for the last five minutes."
"Oh, I must have zoned out there. I was thinking."
"Trying to decide on a job to apply for?" Your damp counterpart asks.
"There’s an opening as a janitor at Crystal Prep Academy,” you respond pointing to the bulletin board.
"Oh, that place? It's a rather prestigious school from what I've learned shambling around the area. Pretty much for the rich kids. The cheap public school is clear out in suburbia clear on the other side of Canterlot."
"Canterlot? This whole city is Canterlot?” you ask.
“Yeah, it’s a big city. Probably one of the better ones I’ve been in since wandering the streets,” he muses.
“Huh. Canterlot’s the pony capital in my world. It’s on the side of a giant mountain though. Like literally, it just kind of hangs off the side of it.”
“How the hell could ponies even build a city like that?” he asks trying to imagine said city.
“Magic, Duh!” you say as if it’s obvious.
“…You know, when I sober up, you’re gonna have to tell me everything about this world,” he says with a shake of his head.
“Oh have I got a tale for you. But yeah, let’s go get these bits turned into your damned dirty ape money.” He gives you a quizzical look and you just roll your eyes.
“Don’t give me that look. You and your kind are so gorramned ugly.”
After dismissing the attractiveness of his kind, B2 leads you down the streets towards what is clearly a bank. Even in another world, some things never change.
“Alright B2, you know how your gross hand money works, so you do the exchange, I’ll hang back and stand guard.”
“Stand guard against what?” he asks.
“You know, Random Shenanigans. I lived in a town for a time where crazy stuff happened weekly.”
“Alright, whatever. But I think I should only exchange some of the bits. If I do all of them right off the bat, folks might get suspicious of why some bum has all this gold.”
“Hmmm, good point. Do a reasonable amount then.”
As he nods and walks up to the counter, you keep your eyes peeled at all the humans inside. It’s not the crowded actually. There are humans in business suits, and even one you can tell is a guard of some kind.
You hear a gasp, and see the bank teller human looking at the bits in B2’s hands.
Well that’s a good sign. Now depending on how much he gets, maybe we can get a comfy bed tonight. B2 is then ushered into another room to meet with someone much higher up than the teller.
“Yeesh, what is this world’s economy if Bits brings out the head Fancy Pants?”
“Yes? Did you need something?” comes a male voice beside you.
“Shove off monkey, I’m thinking,” you wave a dismissive hand to the intrusive human.
Said teenaged human just shrugs and walks out.
“Wait a minute, was that…” you turn around and see a white skinned human with blue hair walking out the bank doors. “…Nah, couldn’t be,” you dismiss and turn back to the room B2 went into.
After awhile, he comes back to you with a wide beaming smile.
“So, how much did you get?”
“100 of your gold coins got me 4,500 dollars,” he says as hands you back your bits.
295 Bits Left
4,500 Human Dollars Added to Inventory
“OK, I’m going to guess that’s enough?”
“Oh for sure. With this, I’ll be able to eat steadily, until we get a job. Also, I found a way to save this cash as well.”
Kersey475’s Comment
He then tells you about how when he was in the office, he spotted a few papers on the desk. When the banker wasn’t looking, he ruffled through the papers and found exactly what he needed.
“It was just like in Person of Interest…You ever seen that show?” he asks.
“Umm, there’s a show called Pony of Interest, but I’ve never actually watched,” you admit.
“Oh, well that doesn’t matter. The point is, one of the plot points stuck out to me, and I actually found a document about a building sold to another bank that promptly declared bankruptcy. If that show's logic holds up, then that building should be in a state of limbo." He explains.
"Wait, the buildings are sentient and limber here?" you ask confused.
"No no, that means the building legally doesn't exist so there’s no chance of being bought or inspected. So basically free room and board."
“Whoa, whoa, are you serious?” you ask excitedly.
“Yup. I should have thought of this years ago…though I guess the last time I was in a bank I was kind of being thrown out due to having no cash and all…but still!”
“Awesome, where’s this place at?”
“Oh, not too far away actually. I wrote the address on my hand,” he says showing a bunch of numbers on his disgusting palm.
“Well alright then. Let’s see what this place looks like.”
After more stumble walking from the both of you, you find the building, and it’s not what either of you were expecting.
“A Library? I don’t know. One of my deadliest enemies lives in one of those…”
“Nah man, think about it. Running water, working bathrooms, and plenty of reading sofas to sleep on. Heck, the Wifi might still be working here,” he says enthusiastically.
“I’m going to pretend I know what the last one is and agree with you,” you say as you turn back to the two story tall building who’s front doors are chained shut. “Sooo, any ideas on how to get in?”
“Oh ummm…No actually,” he admits. “I was kind of hoping you had an idea.”
“Well…I do have one, but I don’t know how well it will work,” you say as you reach your hand into your bag.
“And what’s that?” he asks.
You pull out your WD-40, Vice Grips, and a screwdriver.
“Let’s see if handymanning can get a lock open.”
With B2 standing guard, you are able to use your patching tools to surprisingly pick the lock, even with your noodle limbs.
Making sure the coast is clear, the two of you head into the library, and see just how empty everything is.
Just like B2 said, there are couches, and bathrooms, and even bean bag chairs, but all the books have been taken off the shelves. There are some boxes scattered here and there with books inside, but otherwise, this is just a hollowed out husk of a library…and it’s perfect.
“Sweet! No rent for us!” B2 declares happily as he slumps on a couch.
“This will go a long way to helping us save bits, and to store my technology when I find it.”
“What sort of tech you looking for?” he asks.
“Anything I don’t have in my world really. But before that, we need to get you and me some new clothes and food.”
“What, right now?” he whines.
“Yes right now!” you command.
“But I already did something today!” he whines again.
Rolling your eyes, you clumsily grab at him and haul him up. “Come on, if we’re gonna get you back on your hooves- er-Feet, then you gotta put in more effort. Your body may be clean, but these rags absolutely are not.”
“Ugh, Fine,” he groans in defeat.
"That's the spirit you raggedy abomination!"
It’s Now Time to Shop for Supplies.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
Stats
Page generated in 0.028 seconds
Total duration
707 users online
1,123,035 hits today, 2,591,549 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
After getting a home, Bugzee and B2 decided to go shopping and looking for things to buy, as they separated in a big mall, as Bugzee was walking he stopped looking at a part that had cans with gasoline. At the moment he remembered about the pizzeria and how he wanted to burn it, and something that was in her memory, something that he repressed and that was coming again.
"Puzzles... To many puzzles" Muttered Bugzee as he shivered and stared at the can
"Bugzee... No" Say Selena inside his mind
"But... But... fire... and Puzzles... and..." Began to comment Bugzee but was interrupted again by Selena
"I told you... No... Also, this is another world, surely it's not the same" Say Selena
Meanwhile, somewhere else
A figure shivered as it was reading a old newspaper that commented about how a manager of a pizzeria was found guilty of kidnapping kids to try to brainwash them and make them join a strange cult and was discovered when a anonymous employer talked to the police about that.
"I knew I had to put more traps,,, Damn Samus, just because I cut her pay a couple of times, decided to talk to the police... Not sure if I was lucky or not to accept the deal that one offered me" Groaned the figure as he began to think.
"What was his name? T-Rex? Terrier? Tank? Taxes? Ah... Yes... Agent Thorax of the C.I.A" Muttered the figure
Back with Bugzee
"Okay... I will not burn it..." Muttered Bugzee as he continue his search
---------------------
So... I decided to put what happened to the human side of Kichi... I was not really inspired for anything else. Also I put Thorax as a agent of the C.I.A, mainly as a counterpart for the future reformed changelings. Anything and I edit.
HOW THE HELL DO WE HAVE ANOTHERFUCKING 50/50 POLL?!?!?!?!?!!?!/1111111
Oh my god Falx_of_Lume I think your comment was accidental reference to Sword Art online abirgded!!
0:23
8688751
The songs were just that good i guess.
*hisses through teeth* Ooooaaahhh, yeah, I know what that feels like. Flu is never fun to catch, and it gets exponentially worse when you actually have responsibilities you have to go back to after.
8688758
Ha! Yeah, now that I think about it, that might beginning part of that episode might have popped into my head briefly when I made that comment!
Wow... flu... I actually haven't had a more long lived illness like that, but I've had some people who were just barely able to get out of bed some days. I am very glad you got better, this year's flu season has been very terrible for alot of people.
=============
"Hey Bugze," Selenea sounded almost wistful, "Do you remember when you're Human counterpart gave you all of the money?"
"What's gotten int you? Also his name is B2 -- come on we've been over this."
"Well, I'm not sure, but if you're you and you do tend to scheme --"
"Hey! I do not scheme, I have long and well thought out plans!"
"Mhmm."
"Well what about-- or that one time when--"
"Perhaps scheme is a bit much, your plans are more heat of the moment."
"Hmph. Just you wait until I come up with a good example. Anyway, what were you talking about B2 scheming?"
"Well, whether or not he isn't fully convinced you're an illusion is still up for debate, but I find it strange to give a random stranger all of the money. You could just randomly disappear forever afterall."
"Hey that's not true, I wouldn't do that."
"Maybe not on purpose, but every now and again things come up. The strangest thing is that on our way here, I noticed that there were lots of those metal carriages with price tags above 4500. If money works the same way here, that wouldn't be enough to purchase one."
"So? How does that relate to anything?"
"Well, we used about one fifth, so if all of it were converted into the currency here, we would be able to buy one."
"I've seen alot of those metal things, even got almost hit a few times... So why would anyone kill for that amount of money?"
"Exactly. No really, where is my bug, you've never been like this before; it is a nice change of pace... yet foreign."
"I'm not sure. But I'm just going to guess it's because Sombrero is geeking out instead of messing with my train of thoughts. A quick shush and I'm back to where I was before."
"I will confirm nor deny this 'geeking out'. It must be that you're head is smaller so ideas can travel faster in whatever brain you have."
"Shush you! My bug has more of a brain than you ever will. Tho he may ahve a point..."
"What was that?"
"Oh, nothing. We should plan on finding out what is going on. I would rather not be taken advantage of, especially by B2."
"Okay then. You've got me curious. Any plan?"
"Well back in the day when I suspected misinformation, I would confuse my target as much as possible, and ask the same question later. If the responses did not line up, I knew they were lying."
"Sounds complicated... and tedious. Do we have to?"
An annoyed groan and a facehoof escaped Selenea. "Just when I think you're getting it, you manage to lose the idea at the worst time. Just, go around, shopping and the usual. All the events and information will probably be enough confusion."
"Sooooo. Just do what I was going to do today, and then ask again?"
"Yes. Why do I even bother sometimes, I'll never know."
=======
I was thinking because if the bits are solid gold, there's at least an ounce in each one, so several hundred thousand USD, since that is what the currency is based on.
8689069
Yeah, but plot demands that we be given a limited supply of money, and for good reason. That being said, there's two things we can do from here. Get Bugze to accidentally splurge on useless stuff that's actually useful later a la chekov's gun, or just stick with essentials.
okay so obviously B2 and Bugze are gonna have gotten cleaned up and somehow got new clothes before this scene starts. It also implies that Bugze solves food storage issues by just throwing it into his inventory, so no need for a fridge or anything.
You walk into the mall alongside your counterpart, staring in awe at all of the shop signs.
After a minute or so, you decide to break the silence, though it's not so quiet with all the other humans milling about.
"So, this is basically a large multi level market, right?" you ask.
"That's what a mall is, yes," B2 replies.
The both of you begin walking down the main hall of the mall, taking in the sights.
"Okay, so what was the list again? Work boots in my size, phones, and anything else we consider particularly important, right?"
"Well, yeah. Obviously we're both horrible at making a shopping list, so obviously we'll be playing this by ear," B2 responds.
As you walk and talk, you pass by a particularly interesting store.
"Huh, Narnes and Boble," You comment. ((COPYRIGHT AVOIDANCE HOOOO))
"You sure you wanna go into a book store? Don't we have more pressing matters to attend to?" B2 asks inquisitively.
"Yeah, but for the first time in my life, I actually feel the urge to... read." You respond.
Bugze, are you absolutely sure you're okay? you've been acting strange since we got here.
"I'm fine Selena, trust me."
"Talking to one of the voices in your head?" Your counterpart probes.
"Yep. I'm going to browse inside for a bit. Meet me at the fountain at what appears to be a food court. That one over there," You comment, pointing at a particularly nice looking fountain by a generic looking Chineighse takeout place.
"You're the one who has all the money though."
"Right, forgot about that. Here's 500 dollars just in case you need to make any purchases," You state, handing your counterpart some cash.
The two of you split up, and you walk into the book store. The first thing you see catches your eye, a cardboard cutout of some sort of rectangular device.
Nook? What's an e-reader? Stores books digitally and lets you read them easily? No glare in sunlight? This actually might be something nice to get for Nightshade. I'd be able to consolidate any books I get as well, if I can figure out a way to get them on here. Plus, I could bring back some books from this world too.
In the worst case, it will be a nice memento of the trip.
"Okay, so I'm definitely buying it, plus it's not too expensive, only $99," You speak to yourself.
About a half hour later, you manage to extricate yourself from the book store with a brand new device and several dozen books loaded on it.
((Plot note, if anyone wants to make the books relevant, that would be nice. I feel that we could just pull actual human book titles out and have Bugze try things from them in certain situations. Also, I have a weird feeling that it could turn into a sort of spellbook when Bugze gets back to Equestria. another combat tool, definitely, thanks to plot shenanigans.))
Hmmm...I do believe its time for good old Bugze to get a new set of clothes, and I do believe I have the perfect jacket thing in mind!
As you and B2 walk around a clothing shop (you being amazed that so many brands of clothing exist) you can't help but think to Selena,
There are so many clothes to choose from! Oh why couldn't I have a better fashion sense!? This is gonna take all day to just find me some clothes, and B2 even longer since he's me!
You can hear Selena sigh in your head before saying,
Calm down Bugze, surely it won't be that hard. You've managed to pick out sets of clothes relatively fast back in Equestria, what will make this store any different?
Well for one thing I probably won't have to go crazy over a single piece of clothing that belongs to someone else here...probably. Seriously, why was I so obsessed with that red trench coat again?
As you think this you don't notice the sign reading 'cosplay' as you enter a new part of the store.
It appears the author has decided to mend reality to make the plot roll once again by adding a fictional section of clothing to a store. But hey, what can you do?
Selena is quiet for a few moments before saying,
Okay seriously who are you and what have you done to Bugze?
You couldn't help but sigh before thinking,
Oh come one, I wasn't that ba-OH SWEET LUNA LOOK AT THAT!
Your eyes almost pop out of your head as you stare at what you believe is the perfect new coat to wear.
Its a roughly mid-calf-length coat with a standing collar and chains attached. You can't help but stare at it in awe as you think,
It's...perfect!
I don't know Bugze. It seems to be a little too...well-
No it is perfect! Nothing can make this be-OH LOOK AT THAT HAT!
Your eyes sparkle as you see a visored, ornamented cap, torn at the back above the coat (look at link). You practically rip the two articles off their placements and giggle giddily as you head back to find B2. As you do you don't hear Selena chuckle in your head before she says,
Hehehehehe....nevermind, your still the lovable bug I know.
You say something Selena?
Nothing my bug, nothing at all.
Yeah...I sorta kinda binge some JoJo while I was sick. And yes you read that right, not only was BrownDog sick but so was I! Wasn't as bad as BrownDog's, but the amount of homework I have now mat say otherwise hehehehe....
But anyway, I've got some coat and hat options that BrownDog can use or not. If anyone has a better idea for clothes and such make sure to comment it!
8689352
Hmmm, unfortunate. I feel as tho even with an unlimited amount fo money, Bugze would still mess up, like oh I don't know, throwing a hundred thousand paperbacks into a woodchipper, or paper shredder, or a fire, or setting them on fire with the power glove, or accidentally eating it as a salad, or...
Hmm, still tho limited amount of supply, hek, no idea, Chekhov's gun sounds more fun -- like 2000 snow globes or something
You never know when 2000 snow globes will come in handy, trust me.
8689417
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? We're gonna HAVE to coordinate some JJBA posing.
8690211
I mean, we could always have him buy a crap ton of ball bearings and use them as emergency ammo for the Second Law, turning it into what is effectively an air blunderbuss. Just contribute something that we can use later.
8690447
Why kind sir, I do believe this season shall be covered in the best of posses! As well as many of the JoJo references.
Also, if the situation ever araises, I call dibs on making Bugze “Wrrrrrryyyyyyyyy!!!”
8690456
Okay you get that, but I get "You thought it was X, but it was me, Bugze!"
8690464
Hmmm...a fair agreement. Now to wait for the perfect opportunity!
8689417
If Bugze is rocking the Jotaro outfit, I propose that B2 wear the Old Man Joseph get up. It would go well when he gets a haircut and trims his beard.
8690588
sounds good to me, so long as we get some "OH MY GOD" moments.
I would suggest going to good will or a surplus stor it will save money and you never really know what you might find there from week to week.
Luna, was I ever this stupid and lazy? you think in annoyance.
I believe in your early days you were, but fatherhood forced maturity and responsibility on you.
Perhaps you should make this idiot adopt a child of his own.
Oi! Things are complicated enough already!
===================
Wonder what Nightshade and Grandbuggy are up to...
"Do I have to?" Nightshade whines.
"Sorry grandsweetie, but you gotta get some learning in ya." Grandbuggy firmly insists.
"But daddy never gave a buck about homework!"
"And look where that's gotten him." Grandbuggy snarks.
"Fiiiiine." Nightshade groans as he opens up a textbook, "Starswirl the Bearded-"
"Pffft. More like Starswirl the Jackass." Grandbuggy scoffs before he changes into Starswirl with a brief flash of green changeling flame,
"Oh look at me, I know everything just cause I have a long stupid beard and know a few advanced spells so everypony should always listen to me." 'Starswirl' says mockingly.
"Uh, isn't that species-ist against donkeys?" Nightshade asks.
"It was the DONKEYS who gave him that title!"
==========
NOTE: Bonus points if this scene results in a scene like this sometime in a far possible future...
Nightshade: "Nice to meet ya Starswirl the Jackass."
*Mane 6 look mortified while the Pillars of Equestria break down in uproarious laughter at a child bluntly saying Starswirl's insult-nickname*
Starswirl: *annoyed* "You're Quick Fix's kin alright..."
Either he got short-changed hardcore by the bank, those coins were made of really crappy gold, or those coins were the size of a penny (and made of only decent gold)
9271605
with an exchange rate of 45$, it's likely the gold is a gold alloy with something. I mean really how could Equestria be able to use gold as currency. Unless magic can creat metal with is not likely because that would be like printing money but it would be extremely hard to be able to mine out all the gold, refine it, and then use it. Let's say the ponies are about 4 feet tall. If you like back at episodes and compare it we might be able to get size idk. Anyways I think I'm going overboard cause I have no knowledge of gold exchange rates or rarity in either world.