Her Longest Night

Source

This story is a sequel to A Tale of the Sun, Moon, and Stars

The Moon has fallen, reduced to mere shadow of herself after the Nightmare claimed her. With only fragments of herself left, the Moon must find a way to stop the Nightmare, and escape from her lunar prison. Thankfully she won't have to do it alone.

Luna's story, and the final sequel to A Tale of the Sun, Moon, and Stars.

Pre-Readers: Bok, xXWeed_Princess420Xx, Void Chicken

Cover art "Luna Descends" by LeLittleLuna.

Chapters (2)

Comments ( 9 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 9
- Newest First
- Oldest First

Ice Star

Ice Star #1 · Oct 17th, 2017 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

The Moon has fallen, reduced to mere shadow of herself after the Nightmare claimed her. With only fragments of herself left, the Moon must find a way to stop the Nightmare, and escape from her lunar prison. Thankfully she wont have to do it alone.

Oopsie.

DalTRS

DalTRS #2 · Oct 17th, 2017 · · · Epilogue ·

8494045
Thank you!

Pony_Person_123

Pony_Person_123 #3 · Oct 18th, 2017 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

Will the elements regain their memories once they accend back to allicorns? Bucuse Luna and celestia knew rather stars were their sister.

DalTRS

DalTRS #4 · Oct 18th, 2017 · · · Epilogue ·

8494709
I left that up to the reader. I also made their status in Her Happily Ever After ambiguous for the same reason.

What I wanted to show here is that in every one of the Mane Six beats the heart of Princess/Alicorn.

Cross Lament

Cross Lament #5 · Oct 18th, 2017 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

I'm honestly curious about the odd-alicorn-out in this AU: Cadance. I suspect that it must've been a real WTF moment for Celestia to have a previously-unknown immortal embodiment suddenly crop up.

DalTRS

DalTRS #6 · Oct 18th, 2017 · 3 · · Epilogue ·

8495078
I actually wrote a story about it. https://www.fimfiction.net/story/88484/through-ice-and-shadow

Cross Lament

Cross Lament #7 · Oct 18th, 2017 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

8495161
How did I miss this? Thanks!

Blank Scroll

Blank Scroll #8 · Dec 5th, 2019 · 1 · · Her Longest Night ·

Celestia reared up and charged after it. “Come here you tasty little morsel! No cake has crossed my path and lived!”

Why is this so funny to me?

My name is R

My name is R #9 · Apr 3rd, 2023 · · · Her Longest Night ·

"I love you, sister," she screamed with what little strength she had.

The Moon smiled before succumbing to ~~the sleeps~~ siren song.

sleep’s

So much so that if anypony were to see it they would break into song and dance just to show the everypony how much joy the world had to offer.

Either ‘the pony’ or ‘everypony’, not ‘the everypony’, unless they want to share how much joy exists with a strange entity which combines aspects of all the individual ponies.

hopping from shard to the next in search of the just the right one.

‘one shard to the next’, perhaps? Or ‘shard to shard’?

She landed on it and grinned. “Perfect!”
“This is it,” Laughter said, and pointed to the unassuming shard.

You aren’t supposed to close the quotation unless they are done speaking. Unless it’s Moon who says perfect?

~~they full~~ of the many joyous and wonderful times in her life.

they were full

Storm clouds gathered in the distance while a full ~~moon through~~ the ruined ceiling.

moon shone through

What would we she say?

Celestia embraced her again. “Don’t take too long. Equestria has changed much since you've been gone, but they still need their Princess of the Night.”
“Goodbye, sister,” Celestia said.

Another extra closing quotation.

I’ve been looking for you ~~for long~~ time.

for a long

are so full of self doubt you can’t even ~~begin tell~~ where the lies end and the truth begins.

begin to tell

She would use those doubts get under your hide so fast you would probably just let her take you all over again.

To get under your hide? And? I like ‘to’ best, but ‘and’ might work. Or is this a purposeful oddity due to the speaker?

Honesty’s ~~horned~~ glowed and a bag of what looked like seeds popped into existence beside her.

horn

“Oh these little things?” ~~Honest~~ said,

Honesty

The fruits they produce are just a reflections of all the dark thoughts kept under lock and key.

‘a reflection’ or ‘reflections’.

Her midnight coat shimmered with in the moonlight that radiated from her.

The moon above shone brightly as ever, Luna looked to ~~the~~ it and smiled.

Flanking to both of Luna’s sides ~~where~~ the six Elements of Harmony in all their resplendent glory.

were

Her curly locks of her mane and tail, and svelte form would surely reduce the most jaded of pony to tears the mere moment they could no longer gaze upon her.

‘of ponies’ or ‘pony’, not ‘of pony’.

Viewing 1 - 50 of 9
- Newest First
- Oldest First

DalTRS

Featured In11

Stats

FIMFiction

Follow & Support Us

DalTRS

Also LikedSimilarAuthor

Featured In11

Stats

FIMFiction

Follow & Support Us

Also Liked Similar Author