The Tryst

by Hooves Like Jagger

Operation 3: Don't Get into the Vehicle

"Here we are! This is my little slice of heaven," Tinker announced after throwing the barn doors open. Whatever natural disaster had struck what appeared to be a workshop had left machine parts, blueprints, and various tools strewn about every corner of the room. Every surface had the same sort of clutter piled onto it and every knothole in the walls or support beams had a hammer or wrench protruding from it. The only fixture in the room that wasn't in disarray sat in the center of the barn covered by a white tarp. Based on the outline, Planet Diver only had one guess as to what it could be.

"You think you'll be safe in here?" Sunny laughed as he swooped down into the clutter. He picked up a ratchet and examined it over his sunglasses.

"From Big Lugnut, maybe," Planet Diver grumbled, peering at a blueprint somepony had nailed to a rafter over the barn door. "Don't farms use barns for storing food and tools?"

"Not this one, we retired it a few years back when Uncle Macintosh found the termites," Tinker explained as he rooted through a pile of rolled up papers.

"Termites? So... this place is coming down?" Sunny glanced around as if the roof were already falling on top of them.

"Nah, my dad said I could have the place if I fixed it up. I got rid of the termites, but they did a number on one of the support beams. I replaced the whole thing with some parts I wasn't using." Instead of pointing to the pillar in question like a normal pony, Tinker picked up a tire iron and chucked it towards the back of the barn. The sound of metal slamming against metal rang out, followed by an unsettlingly loud creak. "One day I'll buy a proper garage, if I don't get my own plant up and running before that."

"Do you seriously think that could happen?" Diver asked.

"Of course! The way I see it, it's my destiny!" Tinker proclaimed with an added tap of his flank. Planet Diver took note of the wrench and screwdriver displayed upon it. Tinker continued rooting through his mess while Sunny looked around for the safest place to stand in case the barn decided to come down. Planet Diver was more concerned with the object in the center of the room. He paced around it, running a hoof along the white tarp. Whatever was underneath was no doubt made of metal, just as he'd suspected.

"Tinker? You in here?" All three ponies in the barn turned to the doors. Two more ponies and a dragon stood in the entry. Tinker stuck his head up from behind another pile of blueprints. "Ma said not to let Planet Diver back in the house for at least an hour. Dad might still try to kill him or somethin'." Cogwheel stepped gingerly into the barn, tidying up the mess as he made his way to his brother.

"Yeah, sure. How's Dad doin'?" Tinker asked as he burrowed back into the pile before him.

"Still pretty steamed, but he's not trying to run off anymore. Ma and Pippin made everypony else leave so the three of them could have a private talk."

"Boy Tinker, would it kill you to clean up once in a while?" Snails leaned on the doorpost to look up and around the place. Spike joined him, but didn't say anything; he stood in the doorway, staring at Planet Diver silently. Diver tried not to pay attention to him it, but the dragon's hard stare wasn't easy to ignore.

"It's perfectly fine like this. I know where everything is... everything but-"

"It's right here," Cogwheel stated, picking a rolled up blueprint out of a rusty pail full of nuts and bolts. Tinker rushed over and snatched it up. "I thought you said you were discarding this one."

"Well, I don't know what I was thinking." Tinker cleared the entire contents of a nearby table onto the floor so he could open up the schematic. "C'mere and look at this, Planet Diver." Diver complied, wandering over to look over the younger pony's shoulder.

"Great... what am I looking at?" Planet Diver couldn't make heads or hooves out of the scrawlings on the page, and it wasn't just because Tinker's penmanship is atrocious. Snails trotted over and looked on as well, tutting and shaking his head.

"Your blueprints are professional as ever, eh."

"It's not about professionalism, it's about getting the point across!" Tinker declared. The way he drew up his plans was a sacred art he'd developed himself, but as a result he was the only one who could decipher them.

"I don't see how a picture of yourself declaring you're 'the smartest pony ever' gets the point across, whatever the point is," Snails retorted. Planet Diver considered that Tinker being the smartest pony ever could be the entire point, but he was too busy looking for the drawing in question in the chaos unfolding across the page.

"Is that it? I thought it was a dog or something," Planet Diver put his hoof on the messy caricature. "What's this thing here?"

"That's my mustache, of course." Tinker ran a hoof through the stubble on his upper lip. "But, I didn't bring you out here to show you that."

"Didn't you take me out here to save me from your father?"

"Nope." Planet Diver was starting to wonder where these ponies got their unyielding honesty from. "I wanted to show you what I've been working on. Whaddya think?" Planet Diver looked up at Snails for some guidance.

"I think it's an engine, eh."

"Super." Diver knew he wouldn't be able to appreciate what Tinker was trying to show him even if he could read the blueprints.

"Super doesn't even begin to describe it!" Tinker began to gush, as if Planet Diver was following along or invested in an explanation at all. He allowed his mind to wander while Tinker talked about pistons and optimal air intake. Instead, Planet Diver wondered if Pippin and her mother were having any trouble easing Big Lugnut's temper. He couldn't help but think he should be in there with her. Planet Diver couldn't help but feel useless. He couldn't defend their actions if he wasn't there, but he resigned to his fate when he considered that he also couldn't defend their actions if he was dead.

Planet Diver wondered what had happened to his plan to keep things simple in Ponyville. He had been resolved to stay away from parties, from mares, and from trouble in general. In less than twenty-four hours, he'd managed to go to a party, get with a mare, and find some good old trouble. He wondered if there was any way he could complicate things further.

"Do you wanna try?"

"Huh, what?" Planet Diver snapped back into reality when he realized Tinker was now asking him a question.

"Of course you do, c'mere." Not waiting for a definite response, Tinker trotted to the center of the room and threw the tarp off the mystery object. "Behold, my magnum opus!"

Planet Diver's suspicions had been right; it was an automobile. It was not, however, an automobile he'd ever seen before. Most automobiles in Equestria were box shaped. The basic design was a lot like the old one-pony carts, but without a place to hitch a pony up, four thin spoke wheels, and a roof. Headlights and a grill would adorn the front and an exhaust pipe would stick out the back. These components were standard on every model on the ground or in the clouds, but the amount of passengers that could fit inside sometimes varied.

The vehicle sitting before Planet Diver had only one seat dead in the center without any roof over it. The wheel axles were exposed to the elements for a good foot and a half between the wheel itself and the thin body of the automobile. The body was two and a half times as long as Planet Diver was from his chest to his dock and was just barely wider than he was. The vehicle had only one headlight affixed to the rounded front of the body just over the grill.

All in all, Planet Diver wasn't exactly sure what to make of it. Lucky for him, Snails had a few words of wisdom to impart.

"I see you reattached the front end to the back end."

"How was I supposed to know the brakes weren't going to work?" Tinker retorted. Snails could have made a thousand different, valid rebuttals, but he decided it would be a wasted effort.

"Tinker, Dad said not to let any living creature sit in that contraption, turn it on, and attempt to operate it. I'm pretty sure there isn't a loophole this time, and even if there was he'd be pretty sore if you found one," Cogwheel reminded his brother. Unfortunately, giving Tinker words of warning was like spreading seeds on linoleum tiling.

"I'm sure he won't mind if Planet Diver takes it for a spin around the orchard, right?" Tinker beamed brightly at Planet Diver.

"Uh... I'd kind of like to hear more about how this thing ended up in two pieces..."

"You don't need to," Cogwheel assured him. "Don't get in."

"Don't get in, eh."

"Yeah bro, don't get in! Vroom, vroom, ha-ha!" Sunny laughed from the driver's seat of Tinker's deathtrap.

"Sunny stop messing around," Diver flew up and pulled his brother, still making engine noises, from the seat. Momentarily blinded by Sunny's afro, he felt a hoof grab his shoulder and force him down into the seat. Before he could protest, a helmet was slapped onto his head.

"Safety first!" Tinker declared, reaching across Planet Diver to fasten the seatbelt he'd been forced to install the third time he'd crashed his creation. The helmet became a requirement after the eighth time.

"Tinker, if you were thinking about safety at all, you wouldn't have made this thing in the first place." Spike finally joined into the conversation, knowing full well the dangers of the road Planet Diver was about to embark upon.

"Of course I wasn't thinking about safety! I was thinking about progress!" Madness entered into Tinker's eyes as he twisted a nob on the dashboard of the automobile, causing its engine to roar into a life its tiny body didn't give it credit for. "Just keep in mind Diver," Tinker began to yell over the noise, "I reversed the brakes and the gas!"

"Why would you do that?" Planet Diver asked, pressing down on the brakes as hard as he could in order to keep the vehicle from moving one inch.

*vvvvvvVVVVVVVVVVVROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo...*

"I didn't!" Tinker shouted as Planet Diver careened out of the barn.

---

As the moment of his death seemed to grow closer and closer, Planet Diver began making a mental list of the objects that might have saved or even prolonged his life. Goggles, an anchor, a parachute, steel fur, or perhaps somepony to murder Tinker. Wishing for these things wouldn't keep him from dying, so he tried to focus on keeping his automotive coffin from burying itself in a tree.

The barn's front door had opened up into an empty road, but the road lead to a thinner one that ran through the apple orchard. It was winding, bumpy, and, of course, surrounded by apple trees. Planet Diver had tried to stop, but he soon discovered Tinker had never repaired the brakes. Even with his hoof off the gas, the automobile tumbled gracefully down the slight decline in the road. Diver's salvation appeared in the form of a tall hill. He thanked Celestia he had been able to maneuver safely to this point and allowed the deathtrap to coast up the hill. Before he reached the top, he came to a complete stop.

Of course, what goes up must come down. Planet Diver quickly found the hilltop receding as gravity took over and set a course for the bottom of the hill a split second later.

All it took was a quick glance backwards to confirm he was going to run into some trees if he didn't do something quickly. Reluctantly, he pushed the gas back down and let the engine do what it was designed to do. The wheels ground against the dirt path as they struggled to completely reverse the vehicle's direction. After only a few seconds, Planet Diver was steadily beginning to climb up the hill. He tapped the gas with careful, feather-light pokes of his hoof in order to slowly ascend the hill. After managing to reach the top in one piece, he leaned back and let out the breath he'd been holding in.

He tensed back up when the automobile began rolling forwards down the other side of the hill. His eyes looked down the road in an attempt to assess what obstacle was threatening to bring him an untimely death. To his surprise, the road before him was a perfect straight-away.

He got a feeling akin to the one he got when he jumped off of Cloudsdale as a foal. Ready to push the limits of safety, he gave the gas pedal a confident push. The engine purred, pleased with his submission to the rush. Planet Diver thanked Tinker for fastening his seat belt as the the impact of reaching the bottom of the hill threatened to throw him from his seat. With nothing but smooth road ahead, he opened up the gas a little more.

Once again, Planet Diver was getting ahead of himself in the apple orchard. At the same time, he was enjoying himself immensely. Even after the straight path turned back into winding roads and hills, he kept tapping on the gas little by little. He wished the breaks worked because then he could safely get a little more speed.

As he saw the barn appear back on the horizon, he made efforts to slow himself down. He was still coming in hot when he arrived at the barn, so he performed a slow circle around it before the machine puttered to a halt out front. Planet Diver took the nob Tinker had twisted to start the vehicle and spun it the other direction, silencing the engine. He popped the helmet off and hopped out of the cab with a huge grin on his face.

"Okay, that was pretty cool," he admitted to Tinker who was shuffling awkwardly right in the doorway into the barn. Planet Diver noted that Tinker wasn't alone, but Cogwheel, Snails, and Spike were nowhere to be seen.

"You have a knack for bringing out the worst in ponies, don't you?" Big Lugnut grunted, stepping out of the doorway to confront Planet Diver. "I honestly don't have a big problem with you getting behind the wheel of that deathtrap, but the fact remains that I didn't want it driven at all. You've gotten enough ponies to do what they shouldn't for my tastes, so I'm going to ask you to leave."

"I'll leave, but I want to talk to Pippin first," Planet Diver demanded.

"No, that's not happening."

"Fine, I'll just come by this evening."

"No."

"Alright, tomor-"

"Let me spell this out for you," Lugnut growled as he marched right up to the pegasus. "I want you gone, and if I ever see you around here again I'll nail your wings to my back shoes and go apple bucking. Am I understood?"

"... Couldn't be clearer." Planet Diver turned and left, only looking back at the farmhouse once. He sighed and continued towards the gate when he didn't see the pony he was looking for. He did, however, find Sunny waiting for him just outside the farm's final threshold.

"So... how was the ride?" he asked as Diver trotted right past him and began flying off. Sunny cantered after him, spreading his wings and taking off after his brother.

"I didn't like how it ended," Planet Diver grumbled. Sunny had been there when Big Lugnut had shown up. He expected the earth pony to tear a hole in the roof, but he was surprisingly calm. Sunny explained to Planet Diver how he'd ordered everypony but Tinker to leave. "I guess Pippin and her mom weren't able to talk him down..."

"What're you talking about? He didn't kill you, right?" Sunny pointed out. Planet Diver cast his gaze down on the building of Ponyville beneath them.

"You're missing the point. He told me I can't see Pippin again, ever."

"Ah well, another day, another mare. There are plenty of fish in the sea, so to speak," Sunny attempted to console his brother, but he'd missed the point completely. Planet Diver spread his wings and dove down, landing in a tree in the middle of Ponyville. Sunny followed after him, oblivious to why his brother had stopped.

"Sunny, we've already been over this; I'm serious about Pippin."

"Serious like you want her to have your babies?" Sunny probed for more information.

"Not that serious... but, you know what? Yeah, maybe one day. She's different from the other mares I've been with," Diver tried to explain. It had been less than twenty four hours, so he hadn't actually tried to reason out what was going on in his head. "The other mares were just... just flings, you know? I didn't know who they were, and I didn't care. I was just out to have some fun. Then Pippin shows up, and I know that she's not just some mare. I know she used to be a kid and it would be wrong to just use her. Even with everything that's going on, I think we actually have a shot at the real thing, you know?" Sunny took off his sunglasses so Planet Diver could read it on his face just how lost he was.

"'She used to be a kid', really? You never thought about where full grown mares come from? You thought they just... spawned from clubs?"

"You know what I mean," Planet Diver grunted.

"Actually, I don't. If I knew I wouldn't be asking... so... what did you mean?" Planet Diver rolled his eyes and heaved a sigh.

"I should have known you of all ponies wouldn't get it."

"I think I get it." Both stallions turned their attention to the end of the branch they were standing on. Swansong was looking up at them from a window that lead into massive oak's interior.

"Uhm, hey... uh... this is a tree," Planet Diver explained the obvious.

"Well it sure isn't my mother-in-law. This is Ponyville Library; it's built inside a tree. Come in and take a look," Swansong offered, disappearing into the aged tree trunk. The brothers glanced at each other and shrugged, but fluttered their wings and flew into the window themselves. There was, indeed, a library inside the tree.

"Wow... way to put your fire hazards all in one place," Sunny chuckled, flying back into the air to examine the contents of the shelves. Planet Diver took in his surroundings a little before turning his attention to the fetching unicorn who was smiling sweetly at him. He had to remind himself that he was going after Pippin for a split second.

"I should have trusted Pippin's infallible character judgement skills, you're not as bad as the papers make you out to be."

"Ah... ha, you were listening, then?" Planet Diver asked, hoping that his awkward speech hadn't been heard by any pony other than his brother. To his dismay, Swansong's smile went up another notch on the brightness scale as she nodded. "Please don't tell anypony what I said... please."

"I don't know how much good that will do you," she admitted. "By now, everypony in Ponyville probably knows you two got together last night. Pippin did admit it in front of my mother and Aunt Sweetie Belle, and Celestia knows they can gossip faster than anything I've ever seen."

"Ponyfeathers..."

"I wouldn't worry much about what Ponyville thinks, instead I'd worry about Big Lugnut," Swansong warned.

"Well, he already hates me. Not only am I exiled from Cloudsdale, but now I'm as good as dead if I step hoof in Sweet Apple Acres," Diver explained. Swansong furrowed her brow and heaved a sigh.

"I was afraid that would happen. I've never seen him that angry, even when Tinker caused that five vehicle pile-up in town. He's always been wary of anything that could harm his children, and he's had a rough time of it too. Pippin has always been flighty and careless and Tinker has a penchant for building mechanical disasters."

"What about the youngest one, Cogwheel?" Planet Diver asked, forcing another heartfelt sight out of Swansong.

"We don't know what's wrong with him, but we all know it's just a matter of time. Pippin was a handful right from the get-go, Tinker was only trouble when he learned how to use a wrench, so everypony figures we have a year or two before it's time for Cogwheel to cause trouble." From the little he'd seen of the young colt, Planet Diver found it hard to believe he could be a trouble maker. Out of the three siblings, he appeared to have his head screwed on the tightest. It could be possible there was pressure building up inside him, just waiting to burst.

"Swansong, do I have customers?" A voice called from upstairs. Twilight Sparkle's head popped out of her office to see for herself if her normally deserted library had some patrons. She recognized the two pegasus brothers as soon as she saw them. "Oh... have you two come to check out a book?" she asked hopefully.

"Nope, we just dropped in on a whim," Sunny admitted, flipping through a thick tome before cramming it back onto the shelf and taking out another one.

"I see... they're not bothering you, are they Swansong?" Twilight asked. Swansong shook her head.

"Not at all, we were just getting acquainted," Swansong assured her. Twilight searched her words for a secret meaning, but the comfortable smile of the unicorn downstairs made her drop her defenses.

"Well, if anypony needs me I'll be in my office," Twilight reminded them as her head went back inside her doorway. Her head poked back out momentarily. "Oh, and tell me when Spike comes back. I have mail that needs delivering."

"Sure thing," Swansong called back. Twilight disappeared again, leaving the three young ponies to their own devices again.

"I thought Pippin said she ran a school or something," Planet Diver noted. Swansong turned back to him with a confused look.

"Who?"

"Uh, her... Twilight, right?" Swansong's face lit up.

"Oh, yes! She's also runs the library and works as the librarian while she's here. Spike is the regular librarian, but sometimes I fill in," Swansong explained.

"And when you're not filling in, what are you doing?" Sunny swooped down and asked.

"I actually just started teaching at Ms. Sparkle's school in the Magic department, just like I wanted!" Swansong clapped her hooves together in excitement. "You see, I learned magic from Ms. Sparkle back when I was just a filly. She could do so many amazing things that I always wanted to be just like her, but I also wanted to get better at magic for another reason."

"What would that be?" Planet Diver asked.

"Well, my dad can't talk because he's cursed. I thought if I got good enough at magic and applied myself I could break it, so I worked really hard when I was little. In the end though, I never was able to break his curse."

"Is there any way to break it?" Planet Diver questioned further.

"Well, there is one way," Swansong confessed. "He would have to use music to make one thousand ponies cry."

"Jee, that's easy," Sunny laughed. "You just hold a big concert and play some sappy tunes! Easy peasy... if he could sing."

"He can sing," Swansong revealed. The pegasi brothers gave her odd looks. "It's a weird curse, but he actually did try that. It wasn't until later that we learned that the ponies weren't supposed to cry because they feel sad or touched, but because they were... hurt."

"Oh... wow." Sunny nodded to himself.

"Dad said he'd rather be mute forever than do something so horrible," Swansong noted with a dramatic tone. "Speaking of my dad, I actually should be getting back home." Swansong glanced up at the clock.

"Sorry, we didn't mean to keep you. We should get going as well, right Sunny?" Planet Diver looked over at his brother, who took a brief glance around the library before responding.

"Yeah, this isn't really my scene." The brothers and the unicorn departed from the tree and said good-bye before heading off to their respective destinations. While flying to their temporary home, Planet Diver struck up a conversation with Sunny.

"I have to see Pippin again."

"Well, you don't have to," Sunny reminded him. "From what I remember, her huge dad plans on turning you into a pancake if he ever sees you on his property again."

"I'll just see her outside of his property. He can't stop us from seeing one another," Planet Diver asserted. He cast a longing glance back at where Sweet Apple Acres was disappearing over the horizon.

"I dunno, dude. This is her father we're talking about. He didn't kick you out of his home because he doesn't like your face, you know?" Sunny pointed out.

"I know, I know. I just don't wanna admit it." Planet Diver was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He wanted to prove to Big Lugnut that he would treat Pippin like he wanted him to, but right now Big Lugnut didn't want Planet Diver treating her at all.

"You've gotta understand where he's coming from even a little, right man? I mean, you remember the scumbags that tried to hit on JC at the conservatory, right?" Sunny was of course referring to the upper-crust pegasi that would go after their triplet sister every once and a while at the conservatory she went to. Even if she was only there for less than a week each month, some poor stallion would show up at their doorstep with flowers.

"Not really, they all kinda run together after a while," Diver joked. In all honesty, the brothers never investigated the ponies who wanted their sister's hoof, but they simply judged that nopony was good enough for their precious sister. Planet Diver took a moment to reflect on protecting his own sister from stallions, but going after other mares without much regard. "I guess when a mare is important to you, she's important to you," he muttered to himself.

"I think you just need to sleep this whole thing off. Tomorrow morning, this whole Pippin thing won't even bother you!" Sunny assured his brother. "Trust me, you'll sleep like a foal!"

---

Planet Diver could not sleep. He stared up at the roof of his sister's old cloudhouse and got no closer to sleeping as the night dragged on. His mind was full of other things besides sleep, and all of those things were Pippin. He wanted to know what she thought about her father kicking him out. He wanted to know if she wanted to see him too. He wanted to talk to her for a while about anything, just to get to know her better. He never knew much about the mares he'd been with, but with Pippin the fact ate at him.

Planet Diver rolled over and buried his face in his pillow. All in all, he missed Pippin. It was just that simple. He was certain life in Ponyville would be hardship, but he was far more certain he could put up with it all if Pippin could be a part of it. Planet Diver decided right then and there that he wasn't going to forget about her just because her father had more muscles in his legs than he did.

Planet Diver decided to do something just a little stupid.

Comments

[Fluttershysawhoooooooors]

He's going to the farm, isn't he?

[djthomp]

Well, Planet Diver does seem to be good at stupid, so I'm sure this will work out well for him if he plans it like that from the start.

[TacoTown]

i love it! more updates please!

[Jonnyboy]

Wait why is this story cancelled? ITS AMAZING!