• Member Since 25th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 4th, 2018

Hooves Like Jagger

The thought "Oh no, not this guy again," given human form.


Ponies have done some crazy things for love, but Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash have come up with the hair-brained scheme to top them all. Based on the success Applejack had with her ex-automaton husband, they decide to wake up the robots Nil and Null. They don't see the harm in having the machines masquerade as their special someponies for the day. Surely, it won't have any lasting consequences.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 75 )
Comment posted by XxTestName69xX deleted Jul 26th, 2013

Robotic Stallion: Love Machines
Robotic Stallion: Love
Stallion: Love

This story was awesome. That's all I can say. That's all I need to say.

WELL SHIT I do believe we have something interesting on our hands...

I like...I like VERY much!:rainbowkiss::twilightsmile:

first when i saw it i thought it was a clopfic inspired by big lugnut then i saw who made it and the missing mature tag and it got me happy lol

wow, AI ponies, I was going to write a story about an AI pony, my premise though was far more, complicated. This is fairly straightforward, I like it a lot.

All of my yes!

Edit after reading: That was great! I've been hoping for more robotic pony shenanigans for a while now, and this hit the spot nicely.

Edit much later: Featured box! Well, non-mature featured box that is.

One of these days I'll follow you. I keep meaning to, but my browser won't let me.


This sounds suspiciously like the Batman Beyond episode, Terry's Friend Dates a Robot.

You have my interest. Unfortunately, I don't really have time right now, so this is going into my ever-growing Read Later folder.

You had me at heterosexual shipping.

:rainbowderp: Certainly... Interesting.

*Facepalms* Oh god, so awesomes. Bravo, just bravo!

Hey, a sequel. Good stuff. Looking forward to seeing how it all plays out. Keep it up!

Oh god! SO watching this!!!

*reads last chapter of first story. Sees link*

Oooooooh shit.



You sir deserve a pizza.

CADENCE! You should be in the Crystal Empire ruling it not accidentally causing Twilight and Dash to have robot stalkers.

Oh dear, this can only end too well and with much hilarity! :rainbowlaugh:

I wasn't so sure about a sequel, but my doubts have been most certainly quelled. Can't wait for more.

I find myself imagining Nil and Null's voices to sound similar to HAL's voice for Nil and a cyberman for Null.

There is going to be a lot of: "ERROR. 'Love' not found"
Eventually, it's all going to boil down to "what is this thing you call 'love'?"

1697709 Actually it would end with every pony in equestria singing "What is Love?".

Oh dear. This... This should be good.
Too bad I couldn't find one of a more preferred pony.

No. To large a scale.

You know how Twilight says that there isn't any organic part left inside Nil and Null? That pretty much guarantees that there is some left. In the story's title image, they look aware, like a pony. Not like some machine. In fact, I can already see this ending two ways. They deem themselves unfit or to dangerous for loving RD and Twilight and try to shut THEMSELVES down, or they finally grasp that love is unexplainable and either become real ponies or become the first fully sentient robots. Heck, the only satisfying endings would be a happy ending or a bittersweet ending.

Okay. I have just realized that Twilight and Rainbow Dash are the WORST girlfriends ever. If they can't think of anything better for having a boyfriend than them carrying stuff, it's no wonder they havn't been attracting anypony. Let's hope that they change as well by the end of this story.

Do you mind if I write a critique on this as it is written?

If you really want to, I don't mind.

I got a private giggle out of this:

1. Robotic Stallion Big Lugnut inspired me to write "Twilight and the Spartan Stallion."
2. In the story, Spartan is first released by Twilight from a statue-like stone form in a museum.
3. Nil and Null are released much the same way.


I am very excited to see a sequel, and certainly look forward to the shinanigans that will come from this. The only thing I would beg and beg for, is that you make sure to pound it into our heads which is which between the two of them. They have similiar names, similiar "personalities", similiar bodies and body language--- make sure you really go out of your way to separate them as characters, or we the readers will constantly mix them up.

I can see not everything is sunshine and rainbows in the Apple Household, but hey, such is life. Marriages are not perfect, and the big family is certainly energetic! Perhaps that is a lesson Twilight and Rainbow will learn? I bet it shall. Just remember, not so many story lines this time! The last one had... what... seven? Eight? I was pulling my hair out trying to keep up with it all! ...on a personal note, I love that you have hand-waved Pinkie Pie out of the story. I despise that mare. :rainbowwild:

Looking forward to more like I look forward to an ice cream sammich! :twilightsmile::heart:1715048


separate them as characters

Oh ho ho, I am way ahead of you on that one. At this point, though, there really aren't differences between them. One has a horn and the other has wings. Whatcha gonna do?

And puh-leeeeeze, Mr. Shield. This is Lugnut's successor, so of course there are gonna be subplots. Take comfort, though, for they shall be wound together quite neatly. I promise you won't feel like you're keeping track of completely irrelevant events.


1715059 Could it be? Another that doesn't like Pinkie? :yay:

1736142 I bucking despise pinkie. :ajsmug:

1736205 The too many Pinkies episode killed me man.

Daaaaw poor pippin~

nice chapter. looking forward to how nil and null are going to misinterpret the commands. Twilight might awaken to an entire flower shop on her doorstep
keep it up!

"Uh.... huh. So... do you even know how to love somepony?" Rainbow Dash asked. Null remained quiet. He silently searched through his memory for the proper way to execute his "Love" programming.


And then a robot penis sprang out of him and he POUNCED her! :rainbowderp:

...I mean, whut? :trixieshiftright:

Mares. You're supposed to love them, and they won't even help reprogram you so you can. It's all take and no give with these two.

this is such a good story cant wait for moar

That is exactly how many snails and some octipi do it.

I'm glad to see you're dedicated to fixing my mistakes even in these final moments of humanity.

Why does it say it's cancelled?
It's not actually cancelled, is it???
I just finished reading the story about Big Lugnut so when I saw this I got really excited, then noticed it says cancelled, and now I'm sad...

At first I thought this was an April Fools joke and.... I'm still not sure.

I'm not gonna lie: the portions with Novella nearly had me in a giggling fit. I can't help but hope we see more of her...

Fluttershy blushed. Apple Barrel was not born in the orchard, but he sure as sugar was something’d in the orchard. It was the only viable location.

...I'm so sorry.

cant wait for more :pinkiehappy:
im glad your back my friend :twilightsmile:

Holy shit I thought you were gone for good

Login or register to comment