- Member Since 17th Dec, 2015
- offline last seen Apr 30th, 2020
KittyKatKitKat
A Kittykat who writes stories online about ponies.. Sounds Legit.
KittyKatKitKat
Joined 17th Dec, 2015 ·
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I like it. I wanna see how this all plays out for our Anon. You have my like and fav!
8151483
Thank you! This story took over a year to make! A lot of thought and help came into this first chapter, but it will not take as long as that. I plan to keep the story as consistent as possible, ya know?
8151755
Awesome! There are to little stories with proper spirits or 'ghosts' as it is (The none evil spirit kind). It's good too see you put your heart, soul and perhaps some blood into it.
As long as you keep the story alive most will be happy.
8151878 I agree with you man. This 'ghostly tail' is gonna be good!
Very nice job here!
I can't wait to see more of this.
I wish there were additional stories that had 'not-evil' or 'less-evil' or 'normal-person' type ghosts around. Most places I read stories with spirits in them have that character be unnaturally antagonistic.
I love 'cute ghost' type stories!
8152711 Thanks~! This story has been floating around in my head for quite some time.. I´m glad you like it, and there sure is going to be more!
Cool idea, poorly executed.
You should look for an editor. Also, space out your paragraphs, when they get too long like that, people tend to just skim read or skip them entirely. You don't want either of those.
Edit: I see this is quite the old story, so I don't know if you're actually working on it or not. Carry on I guess.
8153669
Thank you for the feed back!
I´ll try my best to find an editor, and fix the paragraphs. This may be an older story, but it´s been in my mind for some time. And since people don´t really make stories like these, I figured I might as well give it a shot.
For those who want a full view on the characters, find them in this Blog I created with ALL of my OCs and other existing characters i´ve read/created:
WARNING!! THERE MIGHT BE SLIGHT SPOILERS IN THESE! READ THE BIOS AT YOUR OWN RISK!!
https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/597901/list-of-characters-in-stories-i-like-making-and-ocs
8152800
You're welcome!
By the way, I received an email notification about a new chapter of this story, but when I go to read the new chapter it is not listed. I was all excited to read it...
I hope you know about this already, but if not I just wanted to bring it up since I've never seen something like this before!
I'm glad to hear back from you! I really appreciate you responding to me!
lh5.googleusercontent.com/73NgI3gji9zQofPkTjslUfPFrm7noTkQPCROAxiYHisJtoXUUwAh0wr0-ThWLN_CDaxPPxQcNTxsyo4=w1280-h956-rw
Explain this >:'v
why :'v
Disappointment
8174128
Oh, sorry about that!
I accidentally pressed Publish when I was trying to save the story. Sorry to get your hopes up. But, keep them up because it will be coming out soon~!
Waiting for next chapter be like:
media.giphy.com/media/3a1P9ikraSUHC/giphy.gif
8174225
Sorry, on the device i´m using (A Shitty Chromebook
) I can´t see the image.. Describe to me your disappointment.
For those who are interested in the filly ghost, and don´t mind spoilers.. her name is Lilly Cottonflower! Her bio is in the, well.. bio! I also have quite the few OCs and such in there as well. So, if you want to know more about here or about others i´ve written about, then go to the blog. It´s in another comment. BEWARE! THERE ARE SPOILERS IN IT! I WILL TRY TO HIDE THESE SPOILERS, THO!
Ok so constructive criticism time, I like the story, its unique among the ones on site. But the current pacing and formatting is really jarring, it makes it hard to get into. This is especially important for 2nd person stories, first of all I'd suggest breaking the text up more following syntax. In example if someone new is talking or someone hasn't talked in awhile start a new paragraph, that alone should help tons. Secondly try to be more descriptive with what's going on around anon and what he's doing physically and a little less about internal monologue. Internal monologue can be really great in 2nd person but it needs to come with a lot of descriptive text. 2nd person is all about showing not telling, while that is true with all writing it is even more so important with 2nd person narrative. Look forward to reading more. :)
8174399
Thanks!
I truly appreciate you getting back to me so quickly.
I figured it may have been something like that. At least it wasn't FimFiction losing a story or chapter, like I had feared.
Soon? Yes, excellent!
8174401 s7.postimg.org/5dfxzbg57/disapointament.png
I just received the notification of a new chapter in my mail, and when it arrived there was nothing;
My heart breaks
PD: the error in the imagen was me not the chromebook...
8174987
I will try my best to fix the mistakes, and possibly hire an editor! I can't thank you enough!
Thank you so much for the feedback!
8175249
Oh! I am extremely sorry for that! I accidently pressed Publish instead of save! I am so sorry for that. And yes, the chapter will be coming out soon!
The newest chapter is out, peps~! Check it out~!
Well this is certainly intressting
As for guests I vote gaming luna I think she could be intressted in those games
8189852
eh heh heh.. I'm goin' to make it a running gag to rename almost every single gaming system or game ever made for this..
So far its a pretty good story :)
8194751
Thank you~! I've had this in my mind for a while now, and I just didn't know how to executive it right! Welp, good thing I got it right this time!
Really good story.Its true
8198099
Thank you~!
This might seem a bit like nitpicking, but the chapter names are Chapter Numbré uno/dos. If you are trying to translate from Spanish like i think you might be, then that would actually translate to Chapter Name one/two, instead of Chapter Number one/two. If you wanted number, then the proper word would be número, turning the chapter names into Chapter número uno/dos.
(Note that I don't really remember too much of my Spanish, and I might be a little confused, so be sure to fact check me before changing it because it is 3:35 AM and i should probably go to sleep.)
8229353
Oh! Thank you! I don't really take much Spanish, so I tried my best. thanks for the feedback!
8229884
It was no big deal. I'm always happy to help if I can!
When is next chapter I love this story so far
8500919
I'll get back on here.. And the next chapter..
Oh, Sorry! I haven't been on FIMfiction for like, 3 months! My bad!
I'll get right on that! So i'm sorry to make you wait for a bit more.. But it'll be out in no time!
It's alright and the story is really good
8504698
Ta da!! chapter three is out! I'm sorry for it being so little.
alright how do you have sex with a ghost as far as I know normal and fighting type moves can't touch them
8505753
This may reference Pokemon, but it doesn't abide by the laws. So, you technically could have intercourse with a ghost in Eqestria. Or at least, I think you can. It's best not to think too hard on it.
8505764
so anon has the scrappy ability then?
8505782
I guess so
8505798
well at least ghost cant get pregnant or can they
8505804
If by popular demand has people wantin' Lilly getting pregnant by anon, then that's what they will get. Or not. Just kinda depends.
8505812
i wonder what a ghost baby will look like? i wonder if you could see the baby as it grows since you know ghost are see through
8505822
Anon is literally what the human representation of the internet is, so i'd imagine it'd probably have the whole green-gray anon thing going on there. And it would depend if the baby is more human than ghost pony. if the baby is more ghost pony, it wouldn't be see through. the opposite is true if the baby was more like anon.
8505825
i would imagine the kid would be quite skilled and necromancy (or at least controlling souls)
8505828
I might incorporate that! (If it ever comes to that!
)
OOh!! Good idea!
8505833
welcome and if it wouldnt be to much trouble put some meat in the next chapter this one looks a little thin (HA)
8505840
ah ha. I know. People wanted a chapter, but I'm kinda busy, so I made an in between for now. I hope you don't mind it..
8505855
i dont mind it just a little short
8505866
Alright.. that's good.. I haven't even thought about what's going to happen in the next chapter..
8505873
maybe start a rivalry between luna and lilly
8505878
You sir/madam have now given me the idea. You need a cookie!!