Shifting Sands

The Golden Sea is an ancient desert with entire kingdoms now mostly buried under the scorching sand. A land so thick with legend and history it simply lay under the sand waiting to be unearthed. So, when Twilight is invited to go to an excavation in the desert she agrees, expecting to uncover ancient history. However, when she stumbles across an injured sphinx in the middle of the desert she quickly finds more than simple history remains hidden under the sands. Some mysteries are simply best to remain buried.

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Comments ( 5 )

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TRIODES

TRIODES #1 · Sep 8th, 2017 · · · Chapter 2 ·

you might want to look this chapter over again its got small errors scattered around. but other than that, I think this is great! definitely need more stories with sphinxes in them!
season 7 ep 18 spoiler warning!
I'm hoping to see some fics with that sphinx character from the last new episode she was amazing!

Sphinx_Herald

Sphinx_Herald #2 · Sep 8th, 2017 · · · Chapter 2 ·

8414191 Ah... so there is an episode with a sphinx in it, wasn't quite expecting that. Kinda reminds me that I should catch up on all the episodes that I have been missing. Still, thanks for the comment, much appreciated. Until next time,
-Sphinx

On a side note, could you point out some of the mistakes. I don't actually have anyone proofreading my stories (I kinda had some problems with proofreaders in the past). It would help out a fair bit.

TRIODES

TRIODES #3 · Sep 8th, 2017 · · · Chapter 2 ·

Lore shrugs and opens a door in the cargo bay, the door lead down a hall with door(s) of (on) either side.

(wouldn't saying "each side" be better?)

They pause for a moment when Twilight and Lore enter, but mare’s eye(s) grow wide once she see’s Twilight. She quickly bows, taking off her hat. “It’s an honor, princess.”

needs S for eyes.

Lore nods his head so fast it becomes a blur for a moment. Star nods and lets him go. Lore quickly runs out of the room and closes the door behind him. He goes over to the other door and it opens to another hallway. Twilight follows him in and open(s) the door to her room.

needs S at opens.

Lore sprints into his room and starts rummaging through his bag. “Oh, I almost completely forgot about the book I brought. A book that will keep my nicely distracted and out of your way for pretty well the whole trip.”

would be better with "pretty much" instead of pretty "well" the whole trip.

Okay, calm down, she thinks as she starts to take deep slow breaths. The air around her is cool, damp, there’s an earthy tinge to the scent, nothing like the arid desert winds. After a couple of seconds her eyes begin to adjust to the darkness, and she find(s) herself standing in a cavern.

find need an S.

She looks down to see what(')s covering her, while she still can’t see colors it looks almost like slime. It’s stuck in her feather(s) and fur. Slowly, she picks herself up, wiping off what slime she can. Where am I and how did I get here?

feather needs. . . . . . . you guessed it! a S.

She sits up and turns to look out her window. Outside, far below dunes of golden sand ripple across the desert. In the distance the sun is beginning to set, turn(ing) the sky into shades of orange and purple, making it hard to tell where the sand ends and the sky begins. There is nothing on the horizon, no towns, no trees, no mountains, just a sea of golden waves as far as she can see. I guess this is why it’s called the Golden Sea.

turn needs ing.

Twilight tries to follow him the best she (can). She never really got used to walking on an airship,

"can" is missing.

“Wow, it’s bigger than I thought it wa(s) going to be,” Twilight says.

another s at "was going to be"

“No clue, I’m not one of the archeologists, I’m only here to make sure no one splits their head open. Anyways, that’s about it if you have any question(s) just come find me. You have more or less free reign of the site, just don’t bug the archeologists and don’t break anything.”

question needs s.

“True,” Doc says with a quick nod. “But, you’re just as likely to be attacked as you are a pony. You’d probably be killed by a bandit, or a guard. I’ll tell you what, I’ll look into getting a guide and some of the others for a quick trip out that way, but that’ll have to wait til tomorrow at least. Until then, check out the site, get yourselves set up. I’m should head back now, by now someone should have sprained their ankle.” He gives a quick bow to Twilight then heads off toward the medical tent.

i'm should be replaced with I.

just realized I probably should have use red for errors instead of green. sorry if its hard to spot.
anyway I have done you a sevice. for my payment I want. . . . . . . . . the next chapter!

Sphinx_Herald

Sphinx_Herald #4 · Sep 8th, 2017 · · · Chapter 2 ·

8415103 Much appreciated, had I looked through it myself I probably would have found only half, if that. I'm not too particularly perceptive when it comes to a single missing letter, as I seem to have a problem with... Anyways, now that I know someone is properly reading my story I really need to crack down on the next chapter, (was going to do it anyways, but now I have better motivation). Anyways, glad you like the story as of yet, or at least it seems that way. Either way I'm glad and I hope you enjoy the rest of it. Until next time,
-Sphinx

Ps, thank you for the comment on the story always good to see one.

TRIODES

TRIODES #5 · Sep 8th, 2017 · · · Chapter 2 ·

8415153
no problem and yes if I wasn't clear I am liking the story! I actually have the same problem with forgetting to add the ending S'es in my typing too, its pretty common. anyway got this In my tracking.

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