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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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okay i take it into the read later folder, hopefully i don´t miss the update again.
I nearly said the same thing as the last time, but this isn´t really against Trixie here, just something that is probaby true, and even if this would not be about her mother, she would still have to change it.
i am only this far right now, and i like what they have to say till now, but i still hope Mary, or her mother doesn´t get away with everything, i want both sides to have mistakes.
Thank you for that, that little bit made the three chapters around her mother that much better, it was good befor, but i needed that piece of the story.
I am not sure if Maud did something like that with Trixie too, if they did, then Platinum is going to be the suprised one i guess, i mean if Trixie should play with her a bit. Actually i wanted to say, it somehow looks like it would make sense, that Mary and Maud where those which had a playfull moment like that, because Mary already had a Marefriend, and somehow i got used to think that Maud is a bit more foward if she likes someone.
Not sure which set-up i like the most at the moment, Maud X Trixie, Trixie X Platinum, or Maud X Mary.
Oh you still need Platinum X Mary, but Mary just got used to Maud i guess.
Maud X Trixie just seems right to me, because Maud seems to be very understanding, and because Trixie is poor Trixie in every story, it is a cute pairing.
Trixie X Platinum, even if she looks like she would be a bit more experienced in family matters like that, i think Platinum is still something like a nestling, even to Trixie. Earlier in the story it looked like Trixie was her first Crush, and Tixie is already used to the relationships.
I just noticed, even with Trixie now being a secretary, Platinum still have nice, but less importan? impressive job.
I think i just try to say, that Platinum still have a few things to learn, and i am not even sure if that is what she is supposed to do, since i forgot what her Cutie Mark was.
i would have to look again, because i don´t remember it, but i am curious if Trixies mother already knows about all of her Marefriends.
6054845 Don't worry you didn't miss much.
I've actually been having trouble writing the next part, so I took a break from the story anyway and focused on my other stories. I'm finding it difficult to write these days. I even took a break from writing and only read for a few days to cool my head. To be honest though, I'm not sure if I can finish the story as it is now. I'm so close to the end and don't want to stop but it was only suppose to be a week long in story.
Oh, what to do!?!
I'm glad you liked that part. I honestly have the hardest time writing these parts. I can write great action and love sequences, yet due to personal experiences i have difficulty writing things like this, so it makes me happy to see you being supportive. Not to say what things you hadn't liked weren't appreciated either. If somethings bad I like to hear my readers point of views. Helps me improve overall.
Now, as for the pairings, well, I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but I was heavily influenced by a story I read a long time ago called The Teacher, the Sorceress, and the Wonderbolt. Great story with great plot. AANNND lots of sex.
I honestly love the characters I made so much I can't decide who should be the most common hookups. I want them all to have equal time together, good lord I sound like Starlight Glimmer, and I just can't decide!
6055180 Maybe even if i don´t like it that much, you should end the story somehow, and make room for a sequel that you can do if you feel like it, maybe with children, but i guess four Ponys, and children could be to much.
I would prefer a hiatous, or that you make room for a sequel if they started to like each other enough, so that no timeskip would be weird, and then if you feel like it you can write more.
Starlight Glimmer,...well i think i would like to read a story about her, but i am not sure what kind of story.
Right now i like to read more, because i need a bit distraction from the things i have to do in the last time, but no story last forever.
The Teacher, the Sorceress, and the Wonderbolt
It is a bit weird, i am not sure if i really know what i like, and what i don´t like in a story, but i know who i would act in every situation, but i am always suprised if i don´t like some certain stuff, i think i had such moments mostly in romance storys, but i read them the most somehow. (i just like adoption, and stuff like that.)
What i mean is, is it written good or not? the relationship, and the sex? Everytime if i think it is weird that i don´t like it, that Rainbow Dash, Vinyl or any other Character is weird, or to foward in a story, then there is nearly the same situation somewhere else, and suddenly i like it.
Don´t know if you can understand the last part, but i am curious about the story, but at the same time i hope the relationship, and the sex moments aren´t somehow messed up or overdone/overused.
Long story short, i noticed that sometimes it is just the way the author is able to write that kind of stuff, and not because of me, i don´t know why i told you this right now, but well it didn´t hurt, so...how good is the story? Is there a sequel?
6055477 Its so far got a sequel a prequel and a sequel to the sequel. It's a good set of stories very similar to mine, I might add. Or I guess to be more accurate mine is more like hers. A bit of action here and there a lot of sex in it but it's not centrifiacl to the story except to get the ponies to like each other more. Think of sex in the story as very personal bonding time.
6067801 Maud and Platinum are at home at this point.
6074495 I'm enjoying the story quite a bit. I do some writing myself, so I know how it goes. It has been quite interesting so far.
6074532
I'm glad. If you happen to find anything else wrong please let me know. I'd be happy to fix any errors since this story is my 'golden child' of all my fics. Aside from the constant battle with grammar, using the right words can really suck when you aren't very good at writing t begin with. Take this comment for example, it takes on average three minutes for me to do about three to four sentences due to how many errors I usually make in each.
I also suck a typing that doesn't help either. But all that aside glad you enjoy the fic and the conflicts it brings. Sorry if the issues presented aren't very original.
One thing I have to say before I finish reading. There are times in this story that you really need to clarify which 'she' you were talking about. It was confusing at times.
Okay, I finished it. I like the interaction between characters, but there are two things I want to point out/ask about. First, why were Sweetie Belle and Silver Spoon surprised by Trixie's reaction about her mother? Weren't they there with Apple Bloom when Trixie told her story about her father? And Second, how did Mary know what was happening in the room if she was in the kitchen downstairs? Yes, Mary can hear them, but how did she know about the ear nibbling?
6089524
They weren't so much surprised by her reaction as they were her outburst. I shall rewrite that section hopefully to help clarify it. The point of view thing has, hopefully been fixed. I'm also glad you like that ponies interactions with one another. I like to write lovely intimate scenes. But soon there will be hell to pay with Trixie and her mother.