I’m a feminist woman looking to write stories on a male dominated site. It’s an uphill battle but a satisfying one, only as long as I succeed.
A short walk in the Ever Free Forest brings Princess Celestia to meet a very special guest.
No, this story is not in the same universe as my other story World's End, in fact, it's a side mini story. It is in no way related to my other story.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Despite all the improperly spaced words this was a pretty good story. It teaches you monsters are not truly monsters and can be gentle at times. Though there are a couple things you could fix to help the reader read this easier. Fisrt space your conversation's out like this:
“So you live here?” She asked. I nodded.
“Yep.”
“What about Timberwolves?” Apple Bloom asked.
That way the reader knows this is a conversation and not a jumbled mess and at the start don't use periods for everything use comma's or try transition words out they help a bunch. All in all this was a good read and I probably will go check out your other stories after this so yeah. Have a nice day.
Sincerely: Ernest
O... kay. A little disturbing there.
Otherwise, a very nice story besides missing commas and stuff.
The ending was a little unsatisfactory. Maybe you could have ended with a letter from Emerald?
Otherwise, great story. I really liked it.
I thought pony dragons were called Kirins. Not a flaw just something im not sure about.
5315307 In Chinese mythology, there is a legend of a creature called a Longma and it is part dragon, part horse. I thought it was pretty cool. I'm not so sure what Kirins are though.
5316028 huh, I didn't know either. Seems to be a little more integrated than a satyr.
>>Star Pearl Kirin are, in essence, similar to an eastern dragon. Not as long and draconic, but still considered a dragonoid or drake species regardless. I don't think they can fly either. Although I think they're powerful in spiritual magic.
6155390 Longma, Kirin, it's all the same to me. It can be whichever one you want.