And it begins

I am excited about the next update 😆🙃🙅‍♂️

What a twist

“I..I don’t believe it…” The taller one said finally. Before I knew what was going on, she hugs me. I felt my torso wrapped in her chest. “You came back to us.”

“Excuse me?”

“Our brother.” Luna added as she joins in on the hug. My eyes grow large from hearing this. As did everyone else’s in the room.

Why couldn't it be something actually logical. Oh you are the long lost brother of two immortal being, both of whom raise and lower celestial objects, and what have you been in the time you've been away; a human who would live to a hundred at most, one with no magical abilities or supernatural capabilities, but you are related to those two goddesses.

If you had said he was one of those who had combated Paradox and had came close to defeating her, it would be more logical, not by much, but still.

Now I enjoy this story so far, I just wish that you could have came up with a more original and/or interesting way to explain the familiarity.

And what of Rainbows punishment?

8397377
Don't forget Rarity. She did molest him. So that would be aggravated assault and attempted murder for Rainbow. Sexual Assault for Rarity, but then again, she is a princess so she might get off easy.

8397414 True but Rainbow is my least favorite member of the Mane 6.

8397377
Rarity to rape is no joke

?? Brother? Yeah, no comment

I hope the next chapter will shade a light of history.

8397414
Hear, hear.... And don't forget the verbal threat/abuse and rasist comments by Trixie.

“Fluttershy. Tell your thing that unless it wants to be donated to a science lab or a zoo--”

OMG this chapter wqs awesome I can't wait to see what happens next .

SonicBlitz18, please give Rainbow a justifying punishment because what she did to him ever since he came to Equestria is something she's not allowed to get away with. If it was me, I'd be pissed off and want to punch or slap her but I would never hit a woman so at least give her a restraining order or something.

8397884
One of those punishments should being banned from the wonderbolts and never being allowed to go any of their shows.

A restraining order against her.

Him not forgiving her in anyway as she begs on her hands and knees only for him enact the restraining order. To which she'll be arrested and thrown into the dungeons for a bit, as she's dragged away, kicking and screaming for forgiveness, she sees only rage or at least a dead look in his eyes.

As for Rarity. Don't know. She should at the very least be terrified of him now knowing that he could easily ruin her career and life should word get out of what she did to him.

Same goes for Trixie.

They should be tripping over themselves just try and make things right. Only for him to dismiss them every time they come to him.

I'd love to see Dash go into a mental breakdown realizing what she did and how she royally fucked up. Only for him to ignore her suffering.

And that's just the beginning in my opinion.

Also he shouldn't be trusting of the Princesses just yet. Make them work for it.

The pasties that covered her marehood and nipples on her rather huge JJ chest looked just like her cutie marks.

Yeah, I know they are called cutie marks but I like the word tattoo better. I’ll call them cutie marks if they correct me.

This makes no sense. He says Cutie Marks, then acts like he called it a tattoo not a Cutie Mark. In other words, he calls it A, acts like he called it B, and says he knows it's actually A. Change this.

First thing I notice is that her wings are HUGE. One wing by itself looks about as long as she is tall.

If you consider that ratio huge, I wonder what you think of the seagulls in terms of their wing to body ratio.

Calm down! CALM DOWN!! Since I’ve been here, I’ve been slammed against a wall, had my clothes burned, experienced the worst pain I’ve ever experienced in my life, had my body altered, had my virginity taken, and nearly choked to death… twice! I have had it with the whole lot of you! As a matter of fact, I think I’ll take my chances and try to find Zecora and stay with her. At least around her, I don’t have to worry about being killed by other mares that are around her. GOOD DAY!!” I start walking towards the door when I feel a hand on my shoulder.

Given what we've seen of Troy, this is out of character. He's not this aggressive, and while people can have angry outbursts, he's not shown to be prone to drastic mood swings like this.

“You feel...familiar…” She said, confusing me.

“What do you mean I feel familiar?” I asked. She then turns to the blue one.

“I..I don’t believe it…” The taller one said finally. Before I knew what was going on, she hugs me. I felt my torso wrapped in her chest. “You came back to us.”

“Excuse me?”

“Our brother.” Luna added as she joins in on the hug. My eyes grow large from hearing this. As did everyone else’s in the room.

This makes no sense. This didn't just come out of left field, this came out oblivion. Also, them feeling familiarity could not lead to them thinking it's their brother, which means either he looks like their brother or he has a personality like their brother. Obviously, it's not his personality/mind, since he doesn't act with any familiarity towards them, nor does he know what they're talking about when they seem to recognize them, which would seem to be a pretty obvious clue they aren't your brother if you base it on personality. Thus, it's his body. But then, why would they have a brother who was a human and looked exactly like Troy does now? How did he go missing? Why would they assume that he would actually have lived this long if he was a human?

Ok so this came out sooner then I thought it would... but I still don't bet on the next comin out just as quick, so the wait is on again.

interesting plot twist looking forward to the next chapter

8398071
the thing about the him being there brother think of it like this they use magic to sense the energy/soul that is in him and it feels like something they have sensed before and cause celly and lulu are the age they are they can pick up on stuff like that quicker without trying

8398764
They don't use magic to "sense the energy/soul." Nowhere in this story is it stated that they can use magic to "sense the energy/soul." Alicorns can read minds, as stated in the third chapter, but can not detect the energy/soul. Along with that, to use magic to detect their "energy/soul" they would have to be using magic. However, it is not stated in this chapter that they are using magic (their horns weren't lit).

8398938 great kill my mystic speak i wasn't being literal in saying that and through out all the fan fics I've seen and read they are way more in tune with the magic and shit like that there doesn't need to be literal use of it to feel the connection of lets say a sibling that was sent away to return after lets say a complete wipe of the males to protecting him by teleportation magically no less to a different world only to return when it's safe for him to come back (rainbow dash treats not included) that is what i was trying to say and keep an open mind for this stuff I've seen 3 writers quit cause of stuff like that

8399001
To speak mystically, you must first learn how to use proper grammatical structuring and punctuation. If your point was that I should have an open mind about things like that, then you should have started your sentence with "Perhaps," rather than " the thing about the him being there brother think of it like this". By the way, don't ever say "the thing about the him being there brother think of it like this". First, you need to capitalize the start of the sentence. Second, say their instead of there, because there is an indication of a place while their is possessive. Third, "think of it like this" is a completely different phrase and thus you can't put it directly after "The thing about him being their brother" unless you use punctuation.

By the way, please use punctuation. Your comments are run-on sentences despite having places where there should be a period.

While I understand that you're saying that they may be able to sense magic and some soul essence, it has not been stated in this story that they can do say. It has only been stated that they can read minds. As such, I can not assume that they look into his soul or his magic and view the essence of their brother. Of course, as I'm typing this, I thought of something based off of that: If, and only if, they can sense or feel magic/a magic signature, then the amulet that transformed Troy may have been their brother's amulet, and imparted magic and a transformation to him, either because he's male, because he's human, or because he's both. That could be an explanation as to why they could think he's their brother: Humans generally don't have magic, but the amulet had their brother's magic and tied it to Troy, thus marking him with their signature. Of course, he could actually be their long-lost brother, but a lot of HiE stories include the human being some long-lost relation to Celestia and Luna. Going that way would be too cliched, and thus, it's better to have the explanation being the amulet if the magic users can sense magical signatures.

8399084
i don't really have a good sense of punctuation and grammar i got a D- in it. Which is why i'm not going to start a story my self and after a while i said fuck it. So i'm going to say ignore it please i'm try to make it some what better but i can promise nothing and kind of hard for me to focus when i'm on a small or long rant. Also think the amulet which only reacted to him and didn't to all the other i think 12-14 girl in the room with him and the beam only shot at him soooooo yeah that looks to something important to the story and due to it ended on celly saying he is her brother we do not have all the facts yet so don't jump to random ideas i think it's called a cliff hanger for a reason<------ not trying to sound like an ass even tho it's fun sometime for some one who need it lol like Arrested4Loitering the way he is i think he has a huge cast iron poll up his ass or something trying to belittle the only story he was reading and his favorites and following the writer nuf said and again ignore my grammar.

I really didn't wanted to get involved in this but after I read this story Somethings need to be said. Rarity will have to keep her distance from troy and try to ask for his forgiveness before their will form a relationship because of raping him even though he gave into it. I know he'll eventually forgive Rarity but not quickly as she might hope. I know Rarity will be mature enough to know that she'll have to earn Troy trust again if she ever going to want to be near him again. She went on her urges without even thinking of the consequences. If she didn't have protection spell of something she could have possibly been impregnated by him if he is affected by the alicorn amulet in the previous chapter concluded.

As Rainbow Dash she going to have to really make up for all the violent assault and accusations she inflicted on Troy. I can see Troy really won't forgive her that easily but he understood why she attack him but it won't excuses that she try to killed him. Which she should have some form of punishment in the near future if not sooner.

8400971
Keep your fingers crossed bud. I'm hoping the same thing. Because that's what happens in canon. Hades sums up Equestria in a nutshell

8400971
About the Rainbow comment, it'd be interesting if Celestia and the others made her become his servent or something.

Side note: Hopefully there'll be a new chapter soon.

Troy needs justice for these bullshit. But I can predict he going to be another human sex-slave-toy for the horses of this.

8404253
I'm against something like that. That is such extreme prevented fantasy.I want her to ask forgive so hard that she start to fall for him all over again. I wanted her to be punish in a way that she will learn her lesson but is forgiven eventually. Not forced in away against her willed I hate that with extreme passion. When she actually getting in a relationship I want to believe she got we deserve than she is forgiven and their relationship get a genuine reward. I want they relationship is brought out of forgiveness. As I'm sure many of them will be.

So, No! I don't want that at all!

I can see Sunset Shimmer,Starlight Glimmer and maybe Trixie Lulamoon helping Rainbow Dash through trying to help her through after her punishment.

8404974
I didn't mean as in forever. I only meant for a time frame of a couple weeks/months.

8404977
Still see it happening after a punishment thing.

re-read my comment again i edited it.

8404987
Don't get me wrong, I'm not arguing. It was just an idea for a possible plot thread.

8404999
i know you're not arguing. I'm directing towards the bottom with the involvement of Sunset Shimmer, Starlight Glimmer and Trixie Lulamoon.

What? Troy is Celestia and Luna's brother!?

Where's justice when you need it? Rainbow is literally a psycho! Heck that's literally how I would react if some crazy woman is trying to kill me for misunderstanding the situation I am in.

Honestly, yeah. Troy should stay with zecora THAT way rainbow doesn't do something worthy of a painful punishment cause already she has 2 assault's on poor troy.

8415589
Exactly my point. I never liked RD. Atleast Applejack, who also has some trust issues, gives most people/ponies the benefit of a doubt.

8404852
And given the fact that rarity is an alicorn, she probably gonna get off with a warning, which makes ponies all the more racist. Especially with tyranical princesses in the mix.

8422243

Pretty much.

Plus, while I don't hate rainbow dash enough to fully resent her (since she's the element of loyalty afterall) she is a little bit too loyal so much so that it's basically blinding her from being reasonable and just jump like a jaguar that hasn't ate for week's the moment someone takes a hair out of one of her friend's accidentally.

8412408
ummmmm i think that is the point i mean look at the title of the story if it isn't as close to or is a porno then it kind of loses the story all together

and i can just see little miss goth punk jumping his dick a lot if she thinks it as a way to rebel

Rarity should be charged for rape, sexual assault, and burning clothes that weren't hers.

Rainbow Dash should be charged with assault and battery.

Trixie should at least be warned about the consequences of racism.

Man I having a hard time of what is more funnier. Gleamer soon having to kneel and apologies to Troy for treating him. Troy now easily think of a punishment to Dash (although I think with Fluttershy and how reasonable he has being it will be mostly like 'I know have the right to grope, suck and pinch your nipples for exactly 30 minutes, that I will determine when and were 'evil smile'), that Flurry just got an uncle that might catch her attention and help her escape that face, or that Rarity unconsciously finally FINALLY got her wish to be with a prince…ah princess if she though the same with Bluebell and Twilight didn't have anything with any of the princesses.

Oh come on! If Celestia and Luna are siblings to Troy, at least have incest!

8397364
His Equestrian counterpart is possibly their brother.

“Not my fault your guards lack stamina.”

Does this take place in the same universe as A Flurry of Guards?

Nice chapter! I do hope that he actually reacts a bit more warily towards Luna, seeing how she was ready to skewer him in this chapter, based on a mere accusation. Such a rushed action having consequences would be great and also be a great conflict between the two. Even more so seeing as Luna, with her past, could feel less sure of herself, fearing she won't break out of said past and always push others away involuntarily.

Edit: Oh wait, Gleaming was meant with blue-maned. Wasn't that clear to me with just the mane color listed.

And I also do hope for some nice interactions with Flurry. She is snarky, so our protagonist here could snark back. They could have a bit of a fight and then become great friends. I imagine they could develop a rather interesting dynamic!

A hug and a sappy speech derailed him. Guess he wasn’t too upset.