• Member Since 27th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen Sep 28th, 2017

AppleJared


Future USMC Officer.

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Being a soldier is something most equate to honor and the highest respecting position in the world. Some soldiers offer the ultimate sacrifice for their country, others come home in one piece. Big Mac isn't in the glory business, he just wants to serve his time and come home. He finds there is no such deal with the army.

Picture by GordonFreeGuy. This man is a drawing genius. http://gordonfreeguy.deviantart.com/art/Comrade-Macintosh-316577336

Chapters (6)
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Comments ( 18 )

Wow...... Deep stuff good story also

4539700 Thank you. After checking out his stuff, I can say that the man is a virtuoso. He deserves all of the attention his art can get.

Really good job with this chapter.

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Thank you for the kind words. Couple more chapters still left!

A good chapter. I'm glad you added Celestia's responding letter, it was good characterization.

4574607 Thanks. I had some trouble writing in her character and I feel it could have been done better.

I do hope that mac doesn't die on his last mission as that'd be a bit cliche, but so would him returning and just shaking off the damage his psyche has taken. Your characterizations have been quite good so far from my experience of knowing a few soldiers of various amounts of experience, if a bit severe. His sudden epiphany seems a bit abrupt to me though. Perhaps a few lines about how he's slowly turning away from military life, or an increasing longing for home being the catalyst for his decision to finally leave the Military/Special forces/Private Military Contractor he's involved with.

More chilling was the princesses response to Applejack's letter. Both understanding yet with some subtle undertones of a form letter, or at least one she's written many times before. Mac is apparently a very good killer and she has no intention of letting him leave early, both out of fairness for every other soldier and a practical need for experienced murderers.

While a dark ending would fit this story I kind of hope it ends on a somewhat hopeful note; not sunshine and roses but at least with his family happy to see him. They'd have a right to be angry considering he never wrote but if AJ tells him where to go when he's finally home it could be the final reason he's looking for to hang himself.

4583547 I'll probably release the epilogue today, so I won't be talking about the ending until afterwards. There's also a bit of explaining in the last AU as well so keep an eye out for that.

However I can talk about Mac's epiphany, which is anything but sudden. It may not have been stated but there were signs that he was mentally getting better as time went on. His sentence form got more coherent and he said the "I can't cry" line less often. Little things, but still small changes that are supposed to make you believe that Mac's mental state is becoming better. Especially when he admits that his gun is the best friend he has been speaking of, that was the first big step to healing and realization.

I am glad you picked up Celestia's reasoning as a ruler for not forcing him to leave. Writing as her was a bit difficult at first but even the most peaceful and merciful ruler needs killers like Mac.

Thanks for the read and comment.

An interesting Epilogue. Overall, a nice short story.

And it ends.....I enjoyed it, but that lingering question of; 'did he make it back?' is going to haunt me and for that reason I'm going to make me remember the story for a time.

When I was a young boy my Uncle who we always loved and was a caring man went to war, he came back 4-5 years later different, the things he saw scarred him for life, he was still a caring guy, but not as much as he was before, PTSD destroyed him, and we (As in his family and us) kept him sane, but he will never be the same again, no matter how many PTSD sessions he goes to, he is a good man, but war fucked up his mind, No-one deserves that, but we still need a fighting force, so when I become a USMC soldier I know I will get scarred, but its for people how deserve to live, so I don't give a damn.

OH MY GOD WHAT ABOUT WINONA IS SHE ALRIGHT.

The applejack and celestia chapters really elevate this above the typical "my first war is hell story"

Methinks Spring knew he was a dead man. So rather than drag it out...he stepped off the mine and said goodbye with What time he had left.

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