Inspired by games like "The Last Of Us". Focused strongly on background ponies.
Eve was among the many who managed to escape the worst of "Experiment 71". She learns to survive the harsh environments of Post-Apocalyptic Equestria. Upon meeting one particular pony, she discovers that this whole 'experiment' thing was more complicated than everypony thought. With her new friends and allies, Eve journeys across the wastelands to uncover the mystery as of who could have done such a thing and she had to make a choice...
The harsh wastelands takes a toll on everypony, at what cost was this worth? A mere survivor, surrounded by broken cities, broken communities, will she pick up the pieces, or will she falter? Ponies fighting among themselves... not knowing the true enemy within them.
Hi there :3!
Listen, I really like your Story and all, it's just- You are having some problems with describing character. You might just wanna work on your description for a while.
Not only that but;
“That’s why we need gear.” “We can’t always rely on the military.”
Who is talking in which part? I'm a little confused here. You'll have to be careful of that, too, and, if you are short on time- don't worry about that. Once you feel like you are short on time, just look around your other chapters and start putting in more descriptive words. Until then, however, I'd probably fix that quote situation.
You have a really great concept, and I see great potential, just fix the small things.
P.S. Be gentle with the caps, instead of caps, Italicize!
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Thanks for the advice :)
I understand what you mean, I'll be sure to fix the problems.
Can you give me an example where there's a problem describing the character? I'll then know what exactly i need to work on. Thanks again.
Taking it a little to fast. Develop the environment more. The one thing a loved about the game above all else is how good it looked. Detail is the key
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The game is really beautiful and it could be quite difficult to describe accurately in words but i will work on it in future chapters. Thanks for the tip!
I agree with you
idk what to say, it was good tho...
Turns inton zombie, kills everyone, the end
3636019 Haha. Maybe, but that would end too quick :3