• Member Since 11th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 23 minutes ago

MaskedPony


It doesn't matter what interests you're into. What matters, is taking your idea to new horizons and making them a reality.


Featured In1

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This story is a sequel to Nyx's Time with Rainbow Dash


Takes place after the events of Nyxs time with Rainbow Dash

Lunar is given a tour around Ponyville by Twilight, Nyx and Rainbow Dash. But they then discover that Lunar has strange powers that are similar to what Nyx now has. What could it mean? Could it be linked to the Equestrian Emeralds?

The cover art is made by me by using Pony Creator
http://xxmaskedponyxx.deviantart.com/art/Lunar-eclipse-413158777

Nyx belongs to Pen Stroke

This is an unofficial sequel/side story of Past Sins

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 21 )

there are a couple errors
replace

The dream ended with be getting a burn and i wake up."

with:

The dream ended with me getting a burn and I wake up."

replace

we are given Lunar a tour around ponyville."

with:

We are giving Lunar a tour around Ponyville."

3487984 any other errors that I need to know about?

3487997 there are some errors in capitalization

3488135 any others or is that all of it? i'm trying to get everything fix so i can submit it as a new story

Comment posted by Spacecowboy deleted Nov 14th, 2013
Comment posted by MaskedPony deleted Nov 14th, 2013

3488142 what about

became Nyx's Father and Nyx becoming a young ruler by Twilight's side. Nyx came home after the two weeks because she felt like she now has a strong bond with her Godmother, Rainbow 

instead of

became Nyx's Father and Nyx becoming a young ruler by Twilights side. Nyx came home during the two weeks, because she felt like she now has a strong bond with her Godmother, Rainbow

i'm in celestias castle

I'm in Celestia's castle

She was hopping This tour wouldn't go bad.

She was hoping this tour wouldn't go bad.

"Well okay, Is Nyx gonna be with us."

"Well okay, is Nyx gonna be with us?"

Why don't we give Lunar a tour around Ponyvile."

Why don't we give Lunar a tour around Ponyville?"

And that should be the last of them.

earth is goin on?

going

"I will if anyother stange things happen"

any other

"Uh i don't want you to freak out but....how do i put

i guess i have to

Capitalize the "I"

"Good. now what is it sis?"

Lunar. he is friendly

Capitalize the first letter after the period.

I am Nyxs Dad

Nyx's

a shied Cutie

shield

Well come to Carousel

Welcome

stopped a flutters

at Fluttershy's

The fact that there are three capitalization errors in the story description alone is dissuading me from reading this. I'm not going to tell you what they are; I want you to go over it word by word and clean it up. The more you learn to catch your own mistakes, the fewer you'll make in the future.

3564260 aware of that. I just didn't have the time. when i have time, I will go make corrections.

3564267 The time for making corrections is before you publish. No one wants to read something that needs to be deciphered.

3564274 I know that, but if someone tells me there's an error in to story or description, i will go and fix it, even if its already published. besides JoeyJumper94 is helping me out if theres an error. but thank you for telling me anyway :twilightsmile:

3564397

space. she came by

She should be uppercase

from Nyxs voice

and Nyxs Father

Nyx's

stopped and Fluttershys and Raritys.

at Fluttershy and Rarity's

i'm lost in thought right now. i'm

this, i believe

Twilight, i don't know

Well, i'm sure

"I" and "I'm" should be uppercase

"I guess it's because we didn't know about the moves."

what's this?

and celestia can help

and celestia about

Celestia should be uppercase

greeted applebloom with

Applebloom should be uppercase

The Day of The Lunar Eclipse

Capitalization error in the title. Nice.

Nyxs Time with Rainbow Dash

Punctuation error in another title. Fantastic.

a tour around ponyville

what could it mean?

Capitalization again.

pony creator

Yeah, we're done here.

3583194 the punctuation error in the other title, is my fault. sorry. but thanks for the comment, it really helps when i come back and do revisions. :twilightsmile:

found some mistakes

The tour was going grewat for Lunar

i think you meant great

the went on their to Carousel Boutique

the should be they

don't let i bug you

i should be it
other than that i enjoyed it :derpytongue2:


get some help with your spelling :rainbowwild:

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