• Member Since 25th May, 2013
  • offline last seen January 27th

Grenazers


T
Source

A diamond dog name Angus has taken up resident under a bridge near the outskirts of Ponyville. Angus has set up a toll for his bridge. If you want to cross it, you pay the price or get eaten. Unfortunately for him he is about to meet the three apple siblings.

Note: crossover is with the "Three Billy Goats Gruff"
Cover: LunaDarkridge11

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 6 )
Comment posted by xd77 deleted Aug 24th, 2013

"Applebloom was grounded by his sister."

Total 404 Error

Applebloom is not a boy!

Well, it could use some work to clean it up and such (you left the g out of "Angus" once, for example), but overall it worked pretty well as a ponification of that old story, with some decently amusing moments.

3097987

Oh god dammit!:twilightangry2:

Thanks by the way :twilightsmile:

Whenever I think of big Macintosh I always consider him to think of philosophical questions.:eeyup:

There are a lot of tense problems here, switching from past tense to present tense and back, you need to just pick one and stick to it for the whole story. For example: Angus looked at the ponies and sighs. You have looked in past tense and sighs in present tense, looked should be looks, or sighs should be sighed. But this story is really cute and I love it.

Login or register to comment