VIII: Love Rollercoaster
ADORKABLE LOVE
By: Einhander
Edited by: TheLastBrunnenG
Pre-read by: Cola Bubble Gum
Chapter 8: Love Rollercoaster
“Pinkie.”
“Darling.”
“Wake up, darling.”
Pinkie opened her eyes to find Rarity encompassing her entire worldview. She also found that she couldn’t really move.
“I suppose you're wondering why you're tied you to this chair.”
Pinkie looked around. The last thing she remembered was speed, rushing wind, sudden pain and a metal clang. Now she was in Rarity’s boutique. Nopony else was there. After a few moments, she looked at Rarity and nodded.
“Well, there's something I need to tell you -well, ask you, really- and I wanted to make sure you didn't run away until I got to the end. It's a bit delicate."
Pinkie's face was carefully neutral. "Go on."
"It concerns a matter of romance and perhaps even true love."
Another pause. "You're blowing my mind, Rarity."
Rarity took a breath. "Cheerilee has a crush on Twilight, and Twilight has no idea, but the two are currently on what Cheerilee thinks is a date right now and we feel that disaster is imminent."
Pinkie blinked, and then breathed a huge sigh of relief. "Oh, is that all! Phew. I'm so glad you went first!"
"All? Yes, that is ‘all’. Only the future happiness and possible heartache of our good friends! We've been going crazy trying to figure out how to save this!"
Pinkie smiled and shook her head, "Tut Tut, fair Rarity. All will be well. Tell Pinkie alllll about it. Why does Cheerilee think its a date?"
"Oh, yes.” Rarity closed her eyes, took a deep breath and:
“Cheerilee received multiple gifts from my sister and her compatriots all in Twilight's name, when in fact Twilight only meant to give a book, which she wouldn't have given if we didn't push her to do so because we thought--it doesn’t matter what we thought, we were wrong--we later find out she doesn't feel that way about Cheerilee or anypony--well maybe, we got conflicting information later-- so we left them alone for a moment but they took off together and now they're out there somewhere, and I AM SO Tiiiiiiireeeddddd..." Rarity hung her head, sniffling and crying.
Pinkie looked at her with a kind smile. "Silly Rarity! Twilight is at her best when she doesn't- wait a minute.” She frowned. “'We'? We who?"
There was a crash from the kitchen, followed by the sound of quacking and Spike's version of swearing. Both ponies turned at the distraction, then turned back to face each other.
"Was that Quacky?"
Rarity dried her tears nervously. "Your duck will not be harmed."
"It's not Quacky I'm worried about."
"Son of a submariner!"
Spike kicked open the door, sucking on his wrist. His claws were covered in bandages, his arms had several cuts, and his face was Not Amused.
"That's one mean duck."
"Slander!" Pinkie shouted. "Quacky wouldn't harm a fly, unless the fly started it."
Spike looked at his bandaged claws. Pinkie added, "In this situation, you are the fly."
"Whose dumb idea was this?" Spike sniffed.
"Yours."
Spike blinked. "Right. Well, lets get on with it."
Rarity sighed. "You see, Pinkie, according to the Cakes, you can't be trusted to stay still for longer than approximentally three seconds without bouncing on a trampoline. Hence the... Tawdry way of securing you. I apologize, darling."
Pinkie looked at Spike, then at Rarity, then at her ropes, then back at Spike.
"Whatever you two are about to ask, does it involve sneaking?"
Rarity hesitated. “Well...”
“Spying?”
Spike crossed his arms. “In a sense...”
“Secrets?”
Rarity nodded. “Yes.”
“And in the name of True love?”
Spike shrugged. “Who can say, really?”
“I'm in.”
Rarity clapped her hooves in delight. “Wonderful!”
Spike was less sure. “But...”
“I said... I'm in. Now untie me. I've got work to do.”
Spike stayed Rarity's hoof. "Wait. We haven't even told you the plan yet. What ‘work’, exactly, do you have to do?"
"What plan?" whispered Rarity. Spike shushed her with a look.
Pinkie grinned. "This party isn't going to throw itself!"
Rarity shook her head, and lazily floated her fainting couch over and sat on it in defeat.
Spike slowly dragged his claws over his face. "Pinkie," groaned Spike, "that is your answer for, literally, everything!”
"Silly Spike," said Pinkie, rocking back and forth in her chair, "parties are the solution to everything! Somepony's sad? A cheer up party! Somepony's happy? A celebration party! Somepony's sick? A get well party! Somepony-"
Rarity glared at Pinkie. "If this is a drift, I assure you, we have gotten it."
Spike leaned in close to Pinkie, rope coiling around his bandaged claws. He hissed, "What about if this is all (probably) all our fault and if either pony finds out what really happened by accident it would make them SUPER mad at us? What's your suggestion for that?"
Pinkie Pie blinked. "Have you two thought about just coming clean to both of them?"
Rarity ground her teeth. "Be serious, darling."
Pinkie nodded. "Party it is."
Rarity buried her head in her fainting couch.
"No, not just a party.” Pinkie started bouncing in her chair with such force that it began bouncing with her, her eyes red, bloodshot and full of glee. “The biggest party that any pony has ever partied ever! And we have to throw it tonight." She started giggling. "It has to be big, so that you can get some time alone with them. Small parties are great, but you don't get any privacy, because everypony can see each other. At a super super big party, you can get them separate and maybe find a way to steer them on the right course."
Rarity was about to protest, then stopped and thought about Pinkie's words. “I wonder…”
Spike, never a fan of stopping or thinking, groaned, "I told you this was a bad idea, Rarity. Well, I told you it was a good idea first, but then I told you it was a bad idea, and I'm sticking with the bad idea, idea."
"Look, the biggest party that ever partied is your only way out of this. It's happening. No sleep till party! Now either untie me, or you'll have to gag me."
"Gag you?" asked Rarity.
"PARTY!" yelled Pinkie, "PARTY AT SUGARCUBE CORNER TONIGHT! "PART-"
Suddenly Pinkie's mouth was filled with rope. "Done and done," said Spike, tying the knot behind Pinkie's head, "and I mean done."
"Spike!"
"What? She gave us a choice..."
Rarity laid back on her fainting couch, tuning out the muffled shouts of Pinkie Pie. Weariness had been fighting her all night and into the day, and now it was winning. She just needed a nap, just minutes, then she could think....
"PTY!" Muffled Pinkie was not a silent Pinkie. "SGRCB CRNR!"
"We're going to need a bigger gag," said Spike, rubbing his chin.
"PTY! NSLP TL PTY!"
"Yeah..." Spike said grimly, preparing another strand of rope, "definitely a bigger-"
"ENOUGH!" Rarity screamed, buried her head in her cushion, and started crying. Not her oft-heard dramatic sobbing fakery, but actual quiet tears.
Both Pinkie and Spike were silent.
"I'm just so tired, I can't. I can't. I haven't gotten anything done, I made Twilight feel worse about herself, I... I..."
"There there," said Pinkie, stroking her mane "it's alright..."
"No it's not," snuffled Rarity.
"It'll be okay..." Pinkie offered her a tissue.
Spike looked to his left.
"It's all a mess darling." Rarity took the tissue and sniffed, "A right proper cluster-buck, if you'll forgive my Appleloosian." Rarity blew her nose, and a sob came out as well as other things best left to the imagination.
Spike looked to his right.
"It's going to work out, you'll see." Pinkie took the tissue gently in her hoof and threw it in a trash bin.
"If I could just rest, only for an hour," Rarity laid her head down on the pillow of the fainting couch. "That's all I would need."
Spike looked to his left and then to his right. Then he looked down at the rope in his claws.
Pinkie pulled a blanket over Rarity, gently cooing, "You rest. Pinkie's going to take care of everything. You'll see."
"You're a prince, Pinkie..." Rarity felt her eyes closing and sleep taking over. "I mean. Princess."
"It's not possible," said Spike.
Pinkie grinned with her usual enthusiasm, but spoke at a much quieter and gentler pace. "And when you wake up, you can work on your dress, won't that be super fun?"
"Yes... I have to complete the Gallopsy... afterwards."
"And then you'll come to the party. It's going to be a doozy. I promise you that."
"It's just not possible," said Spike.
"And then Twilight will realize she’s in love with Cheerilee," Rarity murmured, "and she'll be happy, and she'll be happy... everypony happy."
"Happy ever after. That's my specialty."
Rarity smiled and closed her eyes. Pinkie stared at her, with a smaller and vulnerable smile, waiting until she heard the small rhythmic breathing that meant Rarity was asleep.
"Now," said Pinkie, "first--"
"How did you do that?!" Spike screamed.
"Ssh!" Pinkie held a hoof. "Rarity needs her rest."
"I tied you up! I gagged you! I was feeling slightly guilty about it!"
Pinkie looked over at the chair with the ropes. "Oh. Oops."
There was a cloud of smoke, and Pinkie disappeared on Spike's right. He turned to his left, and Pinkie was back in the chair, re-tied up, complete with the rope gag. She looked at Spike earnestly. "Idth thth bttr?"
Spike stared at Pinkie. Then he walked over and undid her gag. "How did you do that?" His voice was cracking.
"I don't know?" Pinkie looked up in thought. "I think it only works if it’s funny."
Spike got a very far away look in his eyes. "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills."
"Sounds like you need a new doctor," she grinned. "A FUN doctor."
"Pinkie, for once in your life, can you be serious?!”
Pinkie looked at Spike, who was shaking with anger. “I can try, Spike.”
“This is Twilight we're talking about. Twilight Sparkle. She’s… she’s my family." Spike sniffed. "This has gotten so complicated. I just want Twilight to be happy. And I think we've just made things worse. I don't want anything to happen to her."
"That's a funny thing to wish for."
Spike looked up. "What do you mean?"
"Well then NOTHING will happen to her." There was a pause. "Not very much fun for Twilight."
Spike looked at the sleeping Rarity, then back at Pinkie. "A party, huh? You think that'll help?"
"A little party never killed no pony, as would Applejack say." Pinkie grinned. "Of course, this isn't going to be a little party."
Spike undid the ropes, they freed Quacky from his bonds (after Spike apologized) and they left the boutique. Pinkie led Spike out the front door, whispering, "Did you have a name for this plan you and Rarity came up with?"
"Operation Adorkable," Spike whispered, closing the door behind him, "until we come up with a better name, that what we were calling it."
He found himself snout to snout with a wild eyed Pinkie. All her quiet and gentleness from earlier was gone. Now, there was just the crazy eyes.
"Operation Adorkable? I like it."
She stretched her smile far too widely, like a jack o'lantern. Her eyes blazed with joyful, unsettling intensity. The duck on her shoulder didn’t help. "Listen up, soldier."
Spike swallowed, feeling himself getting smaller and smaller under her gaze. "Yes?"
"Get your party paper and invitation writing claws ready, because we're kicking Operation Adorkable into Phase Two: Big Party in Little Ponyville. And you know why?"
"Er... no?"
Leering over a cowering Spike, she crowed, "Because Pinkie's in charge now."
Scootaloo was in a sour mood.
Sweetie Belle's words had been rattling around her head since last night. She didn't sleep at all. So she'd gotten up early to ride around on her scooter, hoping to clear her head.
Several hours later, it was clear that despite the excellent weather, riding wasn’t helping. Images from yesterday kept invading her mind, yo-yoing with her heart. The agony of seeing her poor teacher cry at her desk. The really happy feelings she got from watching Ms. Cheerilee jump up and down hugging the book. Then the drive home, when she kept waiting for the ground to open up and swallow her whole for the events she and her friends had put in motion. And when Ms .Cheerilee found out that most of the gifts were from them, and not Ms. Sparkle, she'd...
Scootaloo banked hard and skidded to a stop in front of Sweet Apple Acres.
She had no idea what Ms. Cheerilee would do. Would her teacher be sad? Upset? Worse still, capital D Disappointed? They all sounded terrible.
But while Miss Cheerilee's reaction was a mystery, Scootaloo had a good idea what Miss Sparkle would do.
Freak. The Buck. Out.
Scootaloo sighed. She needed her friends. If they didn't have a solution, at least they could stress out together. Sweetie Belle usually slept in on a Saturday, and she didn’t want to wake her up, so she'd made a beeline for Sweet Apple Acres.
She heard a creaky wheel behind her, and turned to find a familiar red stallion pulling a cart full of apples. Scootaloo relaxed. Big Mac always made her smile.
"Morning, Mr. Macintosh! Nice day, huh?"
Big Mac stopped to think for a moment. Then came his conclusion: "Eyyup."
Scootaloo grinned. "Applebloom around?"
He didn't have to think this time. "Nnnope."
Another sigh left her lips. Drat. "Any chance she'll be back soon?"
"Eyyyup."
Scootaloo perked back up. "Oh, cool! Can I wait in the clubhouse till she gets back?"
Big Mac smiled. "Eyyup."
Scootaloo sped off in her scooter, calling behind her shoulder, "Thanks! You're the best!"
Big Mac waved as she tore off into the distance. Scootaloo shook her head. That's the longest conversation I've ever had with him, and he still only said two words.
Oh well. He had said the right one of the two when it counted.
She rounded a corner, picking up speed. The wind on her face, the rows of Apple trees whipping by her, and the prospect of seeing Applebloom helped calm her nerves. The earth pony was the most sensible of the trio (well, except for that whole cutie pox incident), and would tell her she was just being silly. Just a product of her imagination, which she had fought several previous battles with. And lost, but who was counting?
She couldn't have gone to Sweetie Belle anyway. Her unicorn friend was a sweetheart and endlessly loyal, but she was NOT the one to go to make a situation less dramatic.
The clubhouse was in sight. As she prepared to stop, she almost felt serene. Applebloom would fix this. Everything was fine, nothing was ruined.
A familiar voice, not of the Apple clan, shouted. "GET OFF OF ME! YOU’RE HURTING ME!"
Another familiar voice, a voice she hated with the fire of a thousand suns, retorted, "You’re going to pay for that, blank flank!"
Or, you know. Maybe this was a day that'll end with her being arrested for assault.
Scootaloo unbuckled her helmet and hurried over to the base of the tree, where somepony had installed a trampoline. She gave it a moment's glance of confusion before forging onward, putting her hooves on the ladder.
Climbing up the ladder, a different kind of calm came over her. Not serenity. Determination. Inevitability.
Diamond Tiara had said it yesterday herself: It wasn’t over.
Big Mac brought the cart up to the barn, unhitched it and wiped his brow. Hard work was rewarding, but it was still hard. He didn't mind--actually it was his job not to mind--but on days like today, where he was working for two, it was especially draining. Turning to look at the family fields, he decided to take a moment and relax.
He sat in the grass, feeling the cool grass and breeze. That little pegasus filly was right, what a nice day. He smiled again, thankful his little sister had friends willing to come out and visit all the time. Big Mac considered himself not too shabby in the listening and being supportive departments of big brotherhood. He was less good in the conversation department, which became a problem as she had gotten older. Granny Smith was hard of hearing, Applejack was always busy and Applebloom had lots of questions that required more than a one word answer. Thankfully, that tension had gone away when she had made friends with Scootaloo and Rarity's little sister. And Applejack herself had calmed down around the same time, finally willing to accept not just friendship, but help from her friends.
Life had changed a lot in a short period of time. For the better. Except for that whole being enchanted into almost marrying the schoolmarm thing, followed by some polite but unfruitful dates. It would have been just fine with him if that chapter had never happened. He still felt awkward around Ms. Cheerilee. Other than that...
He closed his eyes and soaked in both the sun and the silence. Big Mac wasn't philosophical, exactly, but to the extent that he thought about the afterlife, he didn't fear it. Whatever came next, he had already lived a good life. To expect anything more was greed.
Eeeyup. The trees. The breeze. The peace and quiet-
"Hiya Big Mac! Howya doin? What's doin? How's the grass?"
-which was shattered by a light pink earth pony that was bouncing up and down in front of him. He opened his eyes to see Pinkie Pie smiling at him, a smile that both enveloped and scared him. It seemed bigger than usual.
Standing in front of her was a baby duck with an envelope in its bill. Standing beside and slightly behind her was Twilight's little dragon friend. He was wearing a shoulder bag stuffed with the same envelopes and wore an expression that screamed, 'She’s not going to leave until you give in'.
But what did she want? She kept smiling, but wasn’t talking.
Oh, darn. She had asked him a question. Several questions.
Double darn. They weren't yes or no questions.
Pinkie finally broke the silence. "I know, right? What could be better than sitting in the grass on a nice day like this?"
Panic leaked into Big Mac's heart.
“Why would you ever want to leave this little slice of heaven?”
Sweat starting pouring down his face.
“How could I possibly convince you to get all dolled up and leave your farm tonight?”
He wanted to throw up. The only thing he hated more than being rude was speaking outside of his comfort zone.
“I think it would have to be the most super duper exciting party ever in the history of everything…. what do you say?”
She was doing this on purpose.
“Do you promise to come tonight to the biggest party that any pony has ever partied tonight at Sugarcube Corner?”
“EEEEYYYUUUPPPPPPP!” roared Big Mac, causing Pinkie and Spike to back up at the sheer volume of his outburst. Mac slumped back to the ground, panting at the exertion. Then he realized what she had actually said.
Before he could say another word, Pinkie jumped forward. “YAY! Here is your invitation!” She grinned, grabbed the invitation from the duck’s bill and slapped it onto Mac’s hoof. Then she signaled to Spike.
Spike rolled his eyes and dug into his shoulder bag. He found a small index card with handwritten scribble on it, cleared his throat and began to read:
“Ahem. ‘Accepting this invitation constitutes a legally binding Pinkie Promise to attend Pinkie Pie’s Party to End All Parties, heretofore referred to as PPPEAP.’ Really, Pinkie?” He turned to her with a weary look. “There’s no way this is going to hold up in court.”
Pinkie narrowed her eyes. “You just keep reading, mister. I’ll handle the legal mumbo jumbo.”
Spike sighed. “’Furthermore, you have effectively crossed your heart, hoped to fly, and stuck a cupcake in your eye, and so and on such and such. No backsies.”
Spike yawned, flipping the card over and continuing to read. “Attire is summer formal, black tie optional. Party starts at eight. Bring your dancin’ hooves.’” He lowered the card and looked at Pinkie. She was waving her hoof at him, encouraging him to go on. He blinked in confusion, then said “Oh. Right.”
He reached into the shoulder bag and pulled out a clawful of confetti, which he half-heartedly through in the air.
“’Hooray for everything.’” he deadpanned.
“Double hooray!” cried Pinkie.
“Quack.” said the Duck.
“Seeee you at the party Big Mac!” said Pinkie, turning to bounce away.
Big Mac stared at the invitation, and answered honestly. “Nnope.”
Pinkie stopped. “But you promised.”
Big Mac shook his head. “Nnope.”
Spike sighed, and started scribbling something down on a piece of paper.
Pinkie somehow was very, very close to his face in a short amount of time. “You Pinkie Promised.”
He shook his head nervously. “Err… nnnope.”
Pinkie’s eyes were huge, they enveloped his whole world. Her voice was dangerously calm. “You Took The Invitation. You Pinkie Promised. You’re Coming. Right?”
Big Mac was shaking. Pinkie in his face was the most stressful thing to happen to him since he tried to ask Miss Cheerilee out a year ago. All of Pinkie’s focus was trained on him, willing him to say ‘Eeyup’ and daring him to say ‘Nnope.’
Before he could dare to say anything, Pinkie was holding her duck up to face. Somehow, the duck was near tears. “You’re going to make this duck cry. It’s a baby duck. It’s the saddest of all ducks. Why would you do that, Big Mac?”
“Errr….”
Now Pinkie was in tears. “You’re coming to the party, right, Mac? Right? RIGHT?”
Out of the corner of his eye he caught Spike waving a piece of paper with a hastilly claw-written message. It said:
SAY EEEYUP IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.
“Nnnn…..eee…..eeeyyyup?”
Everything returned to normal. Pinkie was out of his face as quick as she'd come. “Super! Say, anypony else around here?”
Big Mac dumbly pointed in the way of the treehouse.
Pinkie nodded. “Okie Dokie Lokie! See you at the party, Big Mac!” The duck flew onto her back and she began to bounce away.
Spike lingered for a moment or two, shaking his head and saying, "Don't ask because I really don't know. It's been a crazy two days."
Big Mac considered that. He had visions of a pink blur rocketing past the farmhouse several times yesterday, each time in the key of 'Wheee'. Now this.
"Eeeyup."
"I know right? But seriously, if you don't come to the party, she'll hunt you down. You don't want that."
Big Mac was forced to ponder again. He found this kind of heavy lifting awkward. "N'nnnope."
"So dig up your fanciest suit-well," he looked at the stallion skeptically, "Whatever you've got, I guess- and head on over to Sugarcube Corner!"
He threw his claws in the air with a flourish, then turned to leave, muttering, "If nothing else, it'll be epic."
Big Mac watched him go, then felt a wave of exhaustion roll over him. He let his head sink down the ground and sighed. Talking tired him out, but talking to Pinkie took more out of him than an entire day of bucking apple trees. He didn’t want to go to a party, but any prospect of a choice was snatched out of his hooves. He remembered his sister’s stories about what happened when she tried to break a Pinkie Promise down in Dodge Junction. It sounded… unpleasant.
He stared down at the invitation.
Summer Formal? Ah don’t even know what regular formal is.
Well… rumbled his heart, which had a few occasions to speak up, ya do have that suit ya got for… er… ya know.
Haven’t worn that in years. Actually, haven’t worn it all, since....
He closed his eyes as his heart contracted in pain. Accidentally, he had wandered into a memory he promised himself he’d never return to. He opened his eyes, hoping the invitation and the promise associated with it would vanish.
The pink card stared back at him. He snorted.
Doesn’t mean ya can’t wear it again, his heart gently nudged him. Get it cleaned up. Maybe get a new tie. Ya got the bits.
He mentally shrugged. Ah guess so. Seems a waste of’em.
C’mon, brother. Ya ain’t gettin’ out of this party thing, and besides., It’d be nice to have a good memory tied to the fanciest clothes ya own…
Sweetie Belle had done a lot of growing up since she had first met her fellow crusaders.
Earlier in the morning, when she had ran away from Rarity’s home and her problems to the clubhouse, she hoped to find her friends. But they weren’t there, so she decided to wait. And after an hour or two crying by herself, worrying about Ms. Cheerilee and Ms. Twilight, she started to remember the things she had learned since she had found her two best friends.
She had learned about loving your family. She had learned about finding your purpose and place, in your own time. She had not learned about cooking, sadly. She learned that you can’t force two ponies to fall in love, no matter how adorable it might seem. She learned (and re-learned today) that you can’t run away from your problems. She learned about being brave, standing up to bullies and that the only thing to fear was fear itself.
Then she heard hooves scraping up the ladder. She hoped it wasn’t Rarity, she wasn’t ready to deal with that yet. Then she figured it might be Big Macintosh or Applejack, which would have been okay. She hoped it might be Applebloom, which would have made her happy. AB would be able to talk her down from her panic ledge. Then she lit up at the thought that it might be Scootaloo, which would have made her very happy. That orange pony’s smile instantly made everything okay.
“Morning, Sweetie. Keeping our clubhouse warm, hmm?”
Out of all the clubhouses in all the trees in all of Equestria, Diamond Tiara walked into hers. And her little follower, too.
Silver Spoon was bad enough. But all of that facing your fears stuff went out the window when she found herself staring into the eyes of Diamond Tiara. And as far as Sweetie Belle was concerned, Tiara’s eyes were the same as looking into the very heart of fear itself. And the heart of fear itself was grinning like she was going to buck her up.
Sweetie gritted her teeth. “This isn’t your clubhouse. You know that!”
“Really? Then why does it have my name written ALL over it? Right, Silver?”
Silver Spoon was writing on the wall with a marker in her mouth. “Tht’s Rght!”
“Hey! You can’t do that! That’s crusader property that you’re-“ Sweetie’s rage turned to confusion a she watched Silver Spoon’s attempt at graffiti –“uh… that you’re writing on. Whatever it is that you’re writing, there.”
“She’s only writing the truth. Read it and weep, blank flank.”
Sweetie looked at the wall, then back at Tiara. “I can’t.”
Diamond Tiara cackled, “Aww, poor baby. Never learned to read? Ms. Dorkilee is a worse teacher than I thought.”
“Ms. CHEER-I-LEE is a good teacher! And I can read just fine, you big bully! But not even Ms. Twilight could make sense of that jibberish.”
A flicker of doubt shot across Diamond Tiara’s face. She turned and looked at the wall. She groaned. In crude hoofwriting, it said:
daymənd tɑrə roolz
Sweetie Belle snorted, “You tell me what that says.”
Diamond Tiara gave her comrade a death stare that made her back up a few steps. Her words came out slowly and painfully as she pointed at the wall with disgust and said, “What… is … this?”
Silver Spoon dropped the marker and hung her head. “Just… I wanted them to know. You know.” She looked up with a weak smile. “That you rule.”
“Really? Really. That I rule what? The Derpy Hooves society for retarded ponies?!”
Sweetie gasped. It was such an awful thing to say, and to say it to a pony that was supposedly your friend. Silver Spoon simply cringed and lowered her head again.
“This is how you spend your bucking second chance?! I gave you one simple task, to mess up their walls and let them know who rules, and you buck it up!”
“I’m sorry, Diamond…”
Diamond Tiara’s words were flying out of her like hail: cold, fast and they hurt like hell. “You’re an idiot Silver Spoon!” She was screaming in her friend’s face. “Just a flaming fillyfooling idiot!”
Silver Spoon backed up to the wall, until there was nowhere else to go. Her face was a frozen mask of pain and shame, especially with that last insult, which seemed to make her go limp against the wall.
Diamond Tiara kept screaming, but Sweetie Belle wasn’t listening to the words. She kept looking at Silver Spoon, and feeling something she never thought would breathe in her heart when it came to the silver-coated, pearl wearing filly: pity. Sweetie had always seen the two as a unit: the bully and the other bully. For the first time, she realized that being Diamond Tiara’s ‘friend’ didn’t mean you got treated any better.
Sweetie looked at Diamond Tiara. She was still yelling.
“Are you blind, Silver? Is that your problem?”
Sweetie’s pity turned to rage.
“Let me HELP you, then.” Tiara grabbed Silver Spoon’s glasses and threw them on the ground, sneering, “Maybe you need new glasses so you can SEE the mistakes you’re making!”
“Diamond, I said I was sorry! Give those back!”
“I’m doing you a favor.” Tiara readied her hoof over the glasses, a cold smile on her face. “They’ve always made you look ugly. This way, even if you can’t see other ponies, they won’t wretch when they see your stupid face.”
“THAT’S. ENOUGH.”
The voice was huge in volume and power, and no pony was more shocked than Sweetie Belle to realize it was coming out of her. But it stopped Diamond Tiara in her tracks, leaving the glasses unsmashed, and there was no turning back now. She roared, “Stop picking on her like that!”
Diamond Tiara paused, shocked at Sweetie’s newfound bravado. She threw Silver Spoon a cursory glance, like a toy that she’d forgotten she still had, and turned back to Sweetie Belle with a smile.
“You’re right. She’s not worth it.” Tiara kicked the glasses over to Silver Spoon, who fumbled to pick them up. Tiara turned back to Sweetie, her voice suddenly syrupy sweet. “You know, Sweetie, I keep thinking. Why did we get off on the wrong hoof? It’s not like you’re an Apple Family hayseed, or a flightless Pegasus like Scootalooser. You’ve got good pedigree, Rarity’s practically the only pony in this town other than my family whose got some class. Except your parents, of course, but I’m willing to look past that.”
Diamond Tiara had a habit of monologuing when she should have been listening and watching. This was one of those times. Sweetie Belle was a sweet filly, but right now, she looked capable of murder.
“I’ll also ignore that silly scrape we had yesterday when you stood up ‘Miss’...” Tiara shuddered, “Cheerilee.” She sneered “It’s not your fault you got tricked into thinking that fillyfooler knows anything worth teaching us. In fact, there’s a lot you don’t know that I’d be willing to teach you. You’re going to have to learn quick if you’re going to be my new best friend.”
Sweetie Belle again had the curious sensation of rage being replaced by bafflement. “Me?”
“New best friend?” said Silver Spoon, very quietly.
Tiara looked down at Silver Spoon. “Sometimes a cutie mark doesn’t necessarily mean maturity.” She turned back Sweetie. “Of course, we’re going to have to get you a cutie mark—can’t have other ponies seeing me running around with a blank flank—but we’ll get you set. It’s nothing a few hours in my world can’t fix.”
Sweetie Belle looked at Silver Spoon. She was quietly putting on her glasses. She was trying not to cry.
Diamond Tiara adjusted her crown, and smiled at Sweetie Belle. “So what do you say, Sweetie B-“
“You’re a jerk.”
Diamond Tiara’s face fell.
“That’s what you are. You’re lucky to even have one friend, and she shouldn’t be your friend, the way you treat her.”
Tiara snarled, “Well you’re a stupid ninny!”
“You don’t deserve anything you have. Not Silver Spoon, not your cutie mark, not your crown, not a teacher like Ms. Cheerilee, nothing.”
Sweetie Belle’s words were cold and precise. They hit their mark. Tiara was close to losing her composure.
“You three and your… precious Cheerilee! She’s so stupid, with her stupid grinning little flowers! Getting me in trouble because she’s off doing whatever instead of her job. I bet she really is a fillyfooler, I bet she was off on a date with some mare, and-“
“So what if she was? There’s nothing wrong with that!”
The words hung out there in the air. All three fillies heard them.
No backsies.
Sweetie realized what she had said. She realized it was true. There was nothing wrong in Ms. Cheerilee falling for another mare. There was nothing wrong with it at all. There was nothing wrong with her at all. In her heart, she knew that it was okay. She was okay. And if Diamond Tiara thought the opposite, then what as good as the word of Celestia.
Then she looked at Silver Spoon, whose eyes were as big as saucers. A lot of words had been flying towards her in the last few minutes; mean, nasty ones. But these words, for whatever reason, got through. They had a moment of eye contact. Through her glasses she saw Silver Spoon’s eyes, and they were a tempest of confused emotion.
Finally, she looked at Diamond Tiara, who had a giant grin on her face.
“So it IS true.”
The ground was shifting underneath Sweetie’s hooves. She gulped.
“I always thought. Silver Spoon saw Twilight go over to Cheerilee’s house with a gift waaaay late. And then I saw Dorkilee her walking along like a happy idiot, dumb flower in her hair. I thought, but I didn’t know for sure. I do now.”
Sweetie glared. “You don’t know anything. So you just… shut up.”
“No, I don’t think I will. I don’t think I can. Daddy can’t get rid of Twilight, being the Princess’s pet and all, but you can be bucking sure this town won’t stand for a gross fillyfooler teaching their foals. I’ll get her out of here so fast it’ll make your head spin.”
Sweetie summoned her inner Scootaloo. She roared, “You leave them alone. I’m warning you!”
“Nope, nope nope! I’m going straight to Daddy, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” She turned and looked at the cowering Silver Spoon. “C’mon. We’ve got work to do.”
Spoon blinked, and nodded slowly. Shaken, but visibly relieved to be included again, she stood up and started for the rope ladder. Diamond Tiara followed.
Sweetie Belle stared at the retreating form of her nemesis.
“You’re a just bad pony. Celestia says there was no such a thing as a bad pony, but she must not have met you. You’ve got no love in your heart. For anypony.”
Diamond Tiara turned to stick out her tongue. “Sticks and stones.”
It should have ended there. Sweetie Belle had already said enough, and Diamond Tiara had said more than that. But for reasons she wouldn’t be able to later explain, Sweetie Belle added:
“Your Dad must be ashamed of you.”
Diamond Tiara moved like lightning. She attacked Sweetie Belle and threw her to the ground. Snarling and scratching, she screamed “Take it back take it back take it back! ”
Sweetie Belle cried out, “GET OFF OF ME! YOU’RE HURTING ME!”
“You’re going to pay for that, Blank Flank!”
Silver Spoon hopped back and forth beside them, incoherently jabbering, “Guys, stop it, stop it, we’re gonna get in trouble-“
“Shut up you moron!” raged Diamond Tiara, who then grabbed Sweetie Belle by the mane. She yanked it, hard, causing Sweetie to scream. The white unicorn was crying.
Silver heard a sound and turned around. She gasped, “Uh, Diamond-“
Diamond Tiara closed her eyes in frustration. “I said SHUT UP!” Then she hissed at Sweetie, “Take it back, now, or I’m going to-“
But nopony found out what she was going to do.
Scootaloo grabbed her the back of her throat, pulled her up on her hooves and socked her in the jaw. Diamond Tiara went spinning across the floor.
Sweetie Belle gaped at her savior. Scootaloo leaned down and said gently, “You okay?”
Sweetie nodded, sniffling. Scootaloo then turned around walked over to where Diamond Tiara landed.
“Get up.” Scootaloo commanded.
Diamond Tiara held her jaw with her hoof, leaning against the clubhouse wall. She growled, “When I tell Daddy what you’ve done, he-“
Scootaloo struck her again. She went down. “Go ahead. I’ll tell him what YOU did. Now get up.”
Diamond Tiara scrambled to her find her footing. She was crying, but the tears were as was from anger they were from pain. “I’m going to have you arrested, you little fillyfooler! Daddy’s going to put you in jail for this!”
Scootaloo cocked her head to one side. “No. I’m probably going to get chewed out. I’ve been chewed out before.” She raised her hoof again. “Now, get up.”
Diamond Tiara was trying and failing to raise herself when Silver Spoon threw herself inbetween the two of them.
“No!” she shouted. “Please. Don’t. Don’t hurt her.” She held up her hooves. “Just let us go. Please.”
Scootaloo stared in amazement at the spectacled filly, standing up for her awful ‘friend’. Then she stared at her hoof, which had a little bit of blood on it. She felt the anger drain out of her, and her hoof lowered. She spat and said, “Get out of here.”
Diamond Tiara snarled, but didn’t say any actual words. She struggled to get up, pulling away from Silver Spoon’s offer of help. She wobbled over to the stepladder.
Scootaloo called out, “Tiara.”
The pink pony stopped.
“That’s right, I am a fillyfooler. And if you go running to daddy, I’ll be too happy to tell everypony that a fillyfooler kicked your butt.”
Diamond Tiara, without turning to look around, sniffed. “C’mon, Silver Spoon. Let’s go.” She went down the rope ladder without another word.
Silver Spoon walked over to the ladder.
“She’s never going to feel the same way about you, you know.” Sweetie’s voice radiated a tired kindness. “I don’t know what you see in her, but she doesn’t see it in you. You deserve better.”
Silver Spoon stood at the top of the rope ladder, looking at Sweetie Belle. There was a moment of silence. Her eyes were hard and sad.“You don’t know me. You only think you do.”
Then she was gone.
Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo looked at each other. Scootaloo opened her mouth to say something, but Sweetie stopped it with a hug.
“Thank you.” she whispered. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“Hey, no sweat.” Scootaloo said uneasily, feeling a strange warmth go up and down her body as she wrapped her hooves around her friend. It was adrenaline mixed with something else.
They held each other in the morning quiet. Neither pony let go.
“Did you mean what you said?” asked Sweetie.
“I dunno. I might get more than chewed out. I’ve never actually hit a pony before. And I hit her pretty good.”
“No, I meant…” Sweetie gulped. “The other thing. Being a fillyfooler.”
“Oh.” Scootaloo slowly untangled from the hug. “Honestly I was just thinking of the thing that would tick her off the most. She has this thing about fillyfoolers, and I don’t know what that’s about but I thought-“
“Yeah, she does.” Sweetie said, trying to hide her blush and changing the subject. “Um. Is there a mark on my face?”
Scootaloo squinted at Sweetie’s head. There was a giant red patch on her right cheek, that was getting redder by the moment. Scootaloo coughed. “Nah, I can’t, uh. I can’t see anything.”
“It really hurts. Not here-“Sweetie pointed to above her mark, “or here so much,” she pointed below, “but right here. Like, a lot.” She was gingerly pressing the mark.
Scootaloo managed a weak smile. “Nope! Her bark is worse than her bite.”
Sweetie frowned. “Not so sure about that. She said she’s going after Miss Cheerilee.” Scootaloo groaned. “What does THAT mean?”
“She said she was going to go to her dad, and tell her about her and Miss Twilight, and try to get her fired. That was BEFORE the fight, so, who knows what she’s going to do now.”
“Get her fired? For what?” Scootaloo was trying to figure it out. “For liking mares?”
Sweetie Belle looked away, shrugging. “I guess so.”
Scootaloo rubbed the back of her head. “This is just great.”
Sweetie Belle shook her head. “It’s worse, actually. I was coming to find you before she showed up, because… I think we messed up.”
Scootaloo’s heart sank. “You mean with Cheerilee and Ms. Twilight?”
“Yeah… my sister says that Twilight doesn’t feel that way about her… but we KNOW that she feels that way about Twilight.” Sweetie Belle sighed. “I think we’re going to get a lot of ponies hurt. I was feeling awful. I AM feeling awful. That was before I got into it with her highness.”
“Hey, Sweetie.”
Sweetie looked up. Scootaloo was smiling that smile she had wanted to see earlier.
“It’s gonna be okay.”
Sweetie sniffed. “Promise?”
Scootaloo nodded. “I promise.”
They hugged again. It didn’t last as long this time, but it was still nice.
“Now, we need to find Applebloom.” Scootaloo said. “Fast.”
“Maybe you’ll find her AT THE PARTY TO END ALL PARTIES?!” came a sing song voice of madness and joy.
The two fillies quickly got out of their hug and looked around wildy. They found Pinkie leaning in their window, grinning widely. There was a duck on her head, with an envelope in its bill.
Sweetie went first. “Um… Ms. Pie?”
“Thaaaaat’s right! I’m here with an exclusive, never before heard offer to attend the-“ she interrupted herself with a loud gasp, “Sweet Celestia! Sweetie Belle, what happened to your FACE?!”
Sweetie glared at Scootaloo, who was staring at the ceiling. “I knew it.”
Ice cream was imminent. All of its tasty conspirators were rumored to be in the vicinity of Sugarcube Corner, ready to pounce on pony taste buds. And, Twilight noted with a little bit of self satisfied smugness, Applebloom was excited.
There had been some initial kerfluffle about being let into Sugarcube Corner. The place was deserted, except for the Cakes, who were hesitant to open the door to anypony. After several assurances from Cheerilee and Twilight that they were not, in fact, Pinkie Pie, or sent by Pinkie Pie, or in any way bringing in a trampoline. Mrs. Cake reluctantly let them in.
Mrs. Cake then forgot all about Pinkie Pie when she saw Applebloom. She was a sucker for the trembling lips and big eyes of a filly who wanted dessert. She sat them down and took their orders, then bustled off to the kitchen.
The little filly sat inbetween Cheerilee and Twilight, practically twitching with anticipation. "Gosh, how big do ya think this sundae’s gonna be?” She fidgeted with her bow, smiling widely. “Applejack'll never let me get one. Bigger than me, ya think? That'd be... Pretty big."
"We'll find out soon," Cheerilee said, tying a napkin around Applebloom's neck. "Just remember, small bites okay?"
Applebloom giggled. "Yes, Ms. Cheerilee."
Twilight saw Cheerilee wrinkling her nose. She’d seen her other enough over the past two days that she knew when Cheerilee was blushing. Right now, she was blushing.
Twilight leaned over to Applebloom and whispered "I think just for today, you can call Ms Cheerilee... Well, Cheerilee. Okay?"
"Really?" Applebloom said at a slightly-louder-than-necessary conversational volume. "Ms. Cheerilee, Ms. Twilight says I can call ya just ‘Cheerilee’ today. Is that alright?"
The adults stared at one another, eyes wide and smiling awkwardly. Twilight opened her mouth to speak and-
Most ponies were of two minds about things. A pony’s mind and heart, or perhaps her body and her soul, would wage bitter battles about matters both trivial and important.
Twilight Sparkle was not most ponies. She had only one voice in her head.
And it never stopped talking.
Great, now we're both blushing. Stupid biological reactions to social situations! Now I look like an idiot! I guess we both do, but blushing looks good on her, I just look like a popscile. AND, I’m the reason we’re in this mess to begin with! Applebloom was just saying hi, and then I suggested taking her out for ice cream! Cheerilee doesn’t want to ‘hang out’ with a student on her day off. Well, I panicked. That’s what ponies do when they have a new friend they don’t want to annoy in an awkward situation, they panic! I didn’t know what to do, I just said the first thing that came into my head. “Ice cream.” Fillies like ice cream. Does Cheerilee even like ice cream? She didn’t say no. Ohhhh Celestia, I’m a mess. I haven’t slept. I should have gone home and had a nap, or drank a lot more coffee before coming out on this adventure.
Sigh.
Well, now what? I’m STILL blushing as normal reaction to blunt honesty from Applebloom. So is Cheerilee. Ponies blush all the time because of outbursts from the younger generation. ‘From the mouths of fillies,’ and all that of that. It’ll blow over.
Oh no. Cheerilee isn’t just blushing, she looks uncomfortable. Crud. Okay, I need a solution to make her feel better about herself. Umm…. okay, I’ll try to be funny! Jokes always make things! Er… better, I mean! Make things better! Make with the funny!
All of this took place in about two seconds, the time inbetween the glance between the two ponies and Twilight opening her mouth.
“So-“ was all Twilight got out.
Cheerilee turned and smiled at Applebloom. "If it’s alright with you, Applebloom, you can just call me Cheerilee. We’re not in school right now, so let’s just be friends today. I think that'd be... nice.”
Twilight blinked. The problem had resolved itself.
“What do you say, Twilight?" asked Cheerilee.
Uh oh. She’s looking at me again… Twilight’s mind was racing again, I can still make a joke! It’s not too late!
Twilight smirked. "That’s Ms. Twilight to you."
Cheerilee rolled her eyes and chuckled. Twilight joined in.
Yesssss…. Success!
Applebloom just looked confused.
"Wait, why are you a Miss,” Applebloom pointed at Twilight, “and she's just her name? Didn’t we learn ya give titles to older folks? Aren't you much younger than Cheerilee?"
The two ponies just stared at her in horror. Then they look at one another.
Sometimes fate cries out for a white unicorn with blue hair to be in the room, spinning a record, just so there can be a sound of a record scratch after a comment like that. In this case, fate was sorely disappointed to later learn that Vinyl Scratch was passed out on her friend’s couch, and had to settle for an awkward cough from Cheerilee.
Oh no oh no oh no she’s blushing BAD, she’s upset, I made her feel bad. ‘Let’s make a small joke’! Great work, Sparkle. Celestia, I’m such dork.
Cheerilee was staring down at her glass of water. Somehow, even the flower in her mane was drooping to match her mood.
Must. Say. SOMETHING. Fast. Find a gentle way to re-assure her about her age, like that essay on female pony friend relationships I read in Cosmare. Okay, okay, uhhhmmmm….
“Not that much younger, Applebloom” said Twilight. “We’re… more or less the same age. Right?”
Cheerilee was now blushing wildly. “More or less…” she said with a faint smile.
I have no idea how old she is. I have just made things worse.
I want a bush to hide in.
Nopony was saying anything. Applebloom was staring at both of them with that confused face again.
What I wouldn't give for something to interrupt this awkward moment.
“Who’s ready for some ICE CREAM?!” came Mrs. Cake’s sing-song voice. Applebloom's confusion turned to outright squeeeful joy. The two Cakes were carrying the Pinkie Surprise Sunday(TM) out from the back.
Cheerilee visibly relaxed. Twilight grinned.
That’ll do nicely.
The Cakes placed the Surprise (TM) in front of the drooling Applebloom, and offered her a spoon. Applebloom squeaked, graciously accepted the spoon, and stared at the concoction.
Three scoops. Three flavors. Two bananas. Chocolate fudge. One extra scoop of a mystery flavor ("That's the surprise, silly!" Pinkie would say). Extra fudge. Whipped cream. Rainbow sprinkles. Whipped cream. Chocolate sprinkles. Whipped Cream. And because tradition demanded it, a cherry on top (but because this was Pinkie, it was filled with more chocolate). It was less a dessert and more an all out preemptive strike for a pony's taste buds. Carrots and oats didn't stand a chance.
Mrs. Cake grinned at Applebloom, “I hope you like it, dear.”
Mr. Cake said in an oddly calm voice, “Yes. Feast now, before the pink one returns.”
The little filly turned to Cheerilee and Twilight. "This... This is one of the best things that's ever happened to me."
Their earlier awkwardness forgotten, the pair grinned at each other and then turned to Applebloom, to soak in her joy.
Twilight was extremely satisfied.
Yes! Advance planning pays off! Ice cream is the way to brighten a filly’s day. I read the book. Bad day at hoofball? Ice cream sundae. Didn't get in the school play? Ice cream sundae. Did get in the school play? Ice cream Sunday. Lactose intolerant? Uh. Sherbet. And the filly is happy!
"And that's why we read books!"
In both worlds- the real one and the one inside Twilight’s head- there was silence.
I didn’t just say that out loud, did I?
Cheerilee, Applebloom and Mrs. Cake were staring at her with various stages of confused expression. Eventually, Mrs. Cake coughed and said, “That’s nice, dear, but we just wanted to know if you wanted your own spoon.”
Twilight turned and saw Mr. Cake was holding out a spoon, although he seemed to be staring into space.
Yep. I totally did. Urggghhhhh…...
“Er… yes, I would. Thank you Mr. Cake.” Twilight grinned sheepishly and took the offered spoon.
“Yes,” replied the wide-eyed Mr. Cake. “Eat your ice cream and repent your sins. Time is but a window, death is but a doorway. She will be back.”
They all stared at Mr. Cake. Mrs. Cake sighed and took her husband by the hoof. “I’m sorry, he’s been like this since yesterday. We’ve gotten no sleep because of Pinkie and her trampolines.”
Mr. Cake’s eye twitched. “There will be no sleep till we all dance.”
“I think he just needs to lie down. If you’ll excuse us…”
She led her husband up the stairs as he kept muttering, “Yes… we all dance, then it all falls apart, then the sender will be revealed, and then…”
Twilight heard the door close upstairs. She turned to Cheerilee, who shrugged. “Actually, I’m going to use the little filly’s room,” Cheerilee said, standing up from the table.
“Aww!” said Applebloom, “I have to wait?”
Cheerilee shook her head, “You two start without me.”
“Are you sure?” asked Twilight.
Cheerilee winked, “Just make sure I get a bite.”
They shared another smile. Cheerilee, adjusted her mane and walked away.
Twilight found herself watching her go.
Her coat really is such a lovely shade… er, in a purely objective sense, of course. Like, if Rarity was making a dress. She’d say, “What a lovely shade, darling.”
Why am I stressing about this?
Twilight turned back to the Sundae, and found Applebloom staring at her with a big smile on her face.
“Does it taste as good as it looks?” asked Twilight.
“It’s just too adorable!” cooed Applebloom.
Twilight stared at the desert. “Uh… really?” It was many things, but adorable was not one of them. Sloppy and over the top and delicious, but not adorable.
Applebloom giggled. “Not the sundae, Twilight. The two of you!”
The two… huh?
Twilight blinked. “What about us?”
The giggles continued as the filly was rolling her eyes. “Your date, silly!”
Twilight froze.
Applebloom leaned in to Twilight and whispered, “I think it’s going really well!”
What.
Applebloom leaned in further. “She likes you.”
Twilight stared at the filly.
The door to the bathroom opened, and Cheerilee came out, humming a tune, flower still in her hair.
Applebloom leaned back and said, “Trust me.”
Cheerilee sat back down, smiling. “So! How is it?”
Applebloom said, “It’s alllll good.” She took a big bite of the Sundae and winked at Twilight.
Twilight only had one voice in her head.
And it was speechless.
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3127580
SparkleCheer
TwiChee
TwiCh
SpEer
Also: best cover art ever!
I giggled.
Why can this story take my lols and my feels? That ain't right, man.
... Inglorious Basterds? Is that an oblique reference to Inglorious Basterds?
3153378
The only accidental reference so far in this story is 'That 70's Show'. Assume that otherwise, if you caught it, it's on purpose.
3153407 I... didn't say it was accidental?
3153427
That was my roundabout way of saying "yes".
“Yes… we all dance, then it all falls apart, then the sender will be revealed, and then…” Why did you give away the ending of your own story
But seriously, great chapter and I cannot wait for the resolution, for it will be glorious
I lost my shit at Mr. Cake's Ghostbusters II reference.
Pinkie is pinkie, but I'm trying to figure out how Cheerilee is drying her hooves as she's walking when she uses them to walk. Dragging them on the dirty floor, maybe?
I dunno. Good chap, chap.
Interestingly I think Apple Bloom has the right approach here. Confuse Twilight until she accepts the situation.
I don't know if AB is doing that on PURPOSE, but she's sure-hell doing it.
Urge to kill Diamond Tiara rising. Damn it, Silver, wake up!
Anyway fave parts. Scoots punches to the face.
Twilight pulling a JD from Scrubs.
No mysterious package this chapter is the only negative.
Great Chapter, noticed one small thing:
You’re don’t -> should be: You don't
Can't wait for the next
3153504
Urg. You are right. Fixed.
3153460
You are also right. Adjusted.
3153520 I didn't mean it was a bad thing, I just couldn't wrap my mind around it
“It really hurts. Not here-“Sweetie pointed to above her mark, “or here so much,” she pointed below, “but right here. Like, a lot.” She was gingerly pressing the mark.
TOMMY BOY!!!
3153270 I think Cheerilight, or Twirilee works well :p
BOOM-A!!!!!!!
"This little duck has too much boring and not enough burning... TORCH EVERYTHING!"
Well then. I wanted to go to sleep, but NOOOOOO, you had to update the fanfiction at 12:15! And now I'm hungry.
Mr. Cake seems to have become a mad oracle. I suppose lack of sleep could do that to a pony, but still...
3153753
Mr. Cake, from a chapter or two ago:
Yay, more Cheerilight is always good. But, damnit, Twilight, get a clue already!
Also, someone needs to tie Diamond Tiara to a beehive.
I think you just broke the record for most new ships introduced in a single chapter; three, was it?
Also I was literally thinking about that Finding Nemo line toda - OH MY GOD WAS THAT A HOMESTAR RUNNER REFERENCE
3153881
Everything is fine, nothing is ruined.
315327
Sparkilee?
3153893
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4fj7fDMtn1rvs1mmo2_500.jpg
I think someone watched the Great Gatsby, if those references were intentional
I'm madly in love with this story. There's something whimsical about the way you write, it never reads as cynical, or snarky, like a writer who tries to be funny, it's just this wonderful flowing innocence from paragraph to paragraph, like what would happen if you gave a kitten a type writer and asked him to re-write To Kill A Mockingbird.
I just wanted to say that, and also, that you're drastically under rated as a writer and also a world builder; you've got more going on here in one story than a lot of writers could pull of in several, and I'm sure you'll tie it all together in a cute and adorable (or should that be adorkable?) little bow.
Keep up the great work!
Oh man this was well worth the wait. Twi's reaction to this revelation is going to be amazing.
And before I forget
YES! I can't believe I've never seen anyone use this reference with Pinkie before, It fits so damn well. Applause to you good sir.
Applebloom, the greatest awkward moment machine ever to come into existence,.
Excellent chapter and Twilight's reaction is perfect.
Are all the chapter titles songs? Just wondering because I haven't heard of a few of them. If so, I'm predicting 'Love is an Battlefield' to be the title of climactic chapter. It's just too fitting to be anything else.
Ooooooo... Sweetie getting that burn on DT... and Scootaloo with her Big Damn Hero moment.
Nine thousand words go by really quickly when the thing is well written, this ended way too fast!
Nice Roger Rabbit shoutout.
Spike is having one of those weeks...
Can't decide if Ghostbusters was the reference or World of Warcraft since, if memory serves, its ordered differently in the movie but not in WoW.
Bloom silence Twilight's mind... the apocalypse is imminent.
3127580
Twi-Lee
Dammit, Applebloom!
Am I allowed to laugh now?
Brilliant chapter and an epic cliffhanger. I love how Twilight's inner voice works and her neurotic behaviour is written really well in this one. At once both adorable and heartbreakingly sad. Now I just can't wait to see the next chapter.
Also, way to overdo it on the Pinkie Pie is being Pinkie Pie scale. Seriously, her madness now rocks the entire town to its core and this is only the warmup to the actual party. The Cakes are already broken and Big Mac could not have been strongarmed more thouroughly even if he were suddenly facing the Godfather and An Offer You Can't Refuse.
Not sure how I feel about that. Sure, the comedic element is nice but it isn't priceless as I was going to write originally, because it does come at a price: Pinkie Pie is in no way heartwarming or kind when she gets this crazy. Usually in the show she functions quite well in spite of (or even because of) her weird behaviour, but she always finds a way to be soothing before it becomes really bad. In this story, it got really bad a few chapters ago and her madness is still spiralling out of control.
So yeah, comedic element for sure but nice Pinkie is nowhere to be found.
Don't sweat it though. Writing Pinkie Pie is really hard and having her go overboard is a nice way of making people laugh. I did laugh reading this on several occasions. The comedy is pulled off brilliantly.
Also, I strongly suspect Pinkie will find a way to redeem herself in the eyes of the readers.
3156195
Thank you for your thoughts.
....yeah, uh.
Spoilers: Pinkie's not done being crazy.
LESSONS WILL BE LEARNED....?
So many epic moments this chapter. I think that the punch won, however.
Wow! What a way to end a chapter! I don't really know what to think now @.@
I hope we can get a new chapter sooner, rather than later, since I have GOT to find out if this will explode, implode, or become awesome!
This sentence is missing a part, e.g. a "Scootaloo" after "mystery"
popscile -> popsicle
I died.
Off of.
Also, each chapter seems funnier than the last.
When I first read this I though Sweetie had gotten her Cutie mark in, I don't know BEING THE BEST PONY EVER!!!!! but it was just a bruise, on well.